Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

I need to keep busy

129 replies

NAB3lovelychildren · 29/12/2008 17:20

Maybe I am being unrealistic at how soon I will feel better.

Will be alone tomorrow.

Tears not far away.

Just want kids in bed so can relax with DH.

OP posts:
socialpariah · 29/12/2008 17:55

Why will you be alone?
Just hope you ok. Didn't want your post going unanswered x

devilsavacado · 29/12/2008 18:06

Hope you can have a peaceful night.

Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 29/12/2008 18:09

DH at work and kids at ILs

FGS I must be out of tears by now.

OP posts:
honestfriend · 29/12/2008 18:12

I find lots of energetic housework helps! clean the floors, do the bathroom, etc etc!
Not joking- seriously!
Or phone a friend who can't or won't talk about HIM so that you aren't moping at home alone.
Do not expect to feel better so soon- it may take ages, but you will get there.

Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 29/12/2008 18:18

I keep telling myself it has only been about 2 weeks since all this started and it is only day one of really knowing it is over.
A real physical pain is hard to get past. Sick of bloody crying. I do intend to keep very busy cleaning tomorrow after I have been shopping but the tears are never far away as he is on my mind.

OP posts:
LiffeyAgSnamhAnLaCoille · 29/12/2008 18:21

Is your husband leaving you? Would you not like a day to mooch around the shops, have coffee and read the paper..?

What happened two weeks ago? Sorry to make you go over it all again.

Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 29/12/2008 18:25

No, it isn't anything like that. Take no notice. I am being an idiot.

OP posts:
LiffeyAgSnamhAnLaCoille · 29/12/2008 18:33

You go and get your hair done and then have a cup of coffee and read the paper in peace. I know that wouldn't solve a really serious problem, it'd still be there, but it'd be less lonely.

Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 29/12/2008 18:48

Dh just made me laugh

He is messing about with his microphone and piano and sang "I am a smurf" and not I am a smell which DS1 thought he had said!

OP posts:
lonevoiceinthedark · 29/12/2008 19:49

And if I recall NAB a lovely shepherds pie maker. And just look at those highlights. Plenty, plenty good going on just where you are.
Deep breath and let this take its course.
Keep on keeping busy.

Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 29/12/2008 19:51

I have managed not to cry since 6.30 but just shouted at the boys as DS1 woke up DS2 and I hurt my foot on the book/toy I had asked millions of times to move.

OP posts:
lonevoiceinthedark · 29/12/2008 20:19

You are doing the right thing here. Keep going, put it all into a little box in your mind and try to open the box when the time's right. If that's every few hours today, ok, it might only be once a day in a week's time.
Just keep working through this. You will get there.
You have been better with this the last two days than you were before.

lonevoiceinthedark · 29/12/2008 20:21

Also, NAB, my dh has made me laugh messing around with his microphone and the Singstar. Only trouble is, he is wearing the Hannah Montana wig. This is the third time he's been caught in this wig - both dd and I are starting to worry.
We are needed - you need to explain what a smurf is, I need to hide that Hannah Montana wig.

Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 29/12/2008 20:23

You don't know what a smurf is????

OP posts:
lonevoiceinthedark · 29/12/2008 21:34

I know what a smurf is. [BTW who was their 'man' - Father something or other wasn't it] But I am not sure my dcs would know what a smurf is - so not surprised your DS1 thought he said smell.
The Smurf Song was the first 7in single I ever bought. Or was it Rosetta are You Better (Are You Well Well Well) by Pinky and Perky. See, nothing Modern or 90s for me. Strictly a 70s girl.
See, NAB, that's another 20 secs passed. Now it's time for another cuppa, you are doing this and I truly respect the decision you have made here.

Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 30/12/2008 10:43

I had to read your post so many times to get your point about the smurf!! So daft, me.

Well, I have sent my last text, I have bought a yummy dinner for DH and I and now I am off to really get this house looking decent.

Only the one lot of tears today when I told MIL it was finished.

I WILL get through this.

OP posts:
Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 30/12/2008 17:52

Keeping busy did help and I have a mostly tidy house too. Kitchen a bit of a mess and I refuse to do DS1's room days after I had done it but all in all the house looks heaps better.

OP posts:
Fizzfiend · 30/12/2008 18:21

lonevoice - you have just whisked me off to my childhood. rosetta are you better...I remember that one. Remember 'riding along on a pushbike honey, when I notice you...?' Thanks!

lonevoiceinthedark · 30/12/2008 19:25

Jolly good NAB. So we pull up our bra straps (really wide ones in my case) and get through to this time tomorrow.
Here's another oldie for you 'One day at a time, sweet Jesus...'
Fizz I would scrape the bottom of the barrel to keep NAB thinking of other things at the mo. But I do remember that one, along with the legendary 'I've got a brand new combine harvester'.

Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 30/12/2008 21:23

I am fine.

I really feel I will get over this.

that I feel I have lost a friend but he knows where I am and it will NOT be like it was before. (Don't think I will hear from him again tbh. He is with his wife and knows he can't be friends with me. But just in case)

All good.

Off now for an early night

Thanks guys

OP posts:
Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 31/12/2008 20:49

Been thinking about him tonight and feeling we can't wish each other a happy new year.

OP posts:
misscathcart · 31/12/2008 21:00

sorry you are having a hard time, don't know the history to this but wanted you to know it hadn't gone un-noticed! I hope you get through the night ok with the help of mn of course

misscathcart · 31/12/2008 21:00

unoticed*

Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 01/01/2009 10:19

Thank you.

I was sure I replied to you last night but maybe it is flying around cyber space!

OP posts:
Original poster
NAB3lovelychildren · 01/01/2009 21:34

It is hard to let go when I never wanted too in the first place all those years ago and now feel like this was another chance, but for what, who knows.

I know I am being a pest posting loads about this but it has to be better than emailing him.

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread