I need to keep busy

[NAB3lovelychildren]

Maybe I am being unrealistic at how soon I will feel better.

Will be alone tomorrow.

Tears not far away.

Just want kids in bed so can relax with DH.

Agree with CD. I think you need to work on your relationship with DH now - however bad you're feeling, he is likely to be feeling just as bad seeing you in love with another man.

I think I might leave everyone.

NAB, you WILL get through this as unlikely as it seems at the moment.

No matter how you want to spin it, the reality appears to be that he is not that interested. He's not responding because he doesn't want to mess his/your life up/he's actually not that unhappy with his wife/whatever reason/he just doesn't want to that much so ..... he is not responding.

And that tends to be because someone doeasn't really want to.

Really hope you can give yourself a mental kick and shake and get yourself into a better frame of mind. He is not your knight in shining armour about to whisk you away to a dream life and happy ever after.

I probably sound quite harsh but I am so sorry you are going through this.

I have been lurking on this thread.

What do you mean NAB?

I know why he isn't answering. He is trying to give me space to get my head straight. Not working though.

I want to run away.

I agree with CD and snoringnightmare, you need to stop torturing yourself.

You will never get over him if you keep trying to rekindle something. Your DH deseves better than this. The more you continue this 'quest' the more likely DH is to find out and you may well have the choice taken out of your hands. He may well leave you and you'll have neither of them.

I know it's harsh but all this navel gazing is no good for you. You must be able to see that.

NAB you don't know why
You have no idea what he is thinking
That is what you want to think
Am I right in thinking that he has said he wants to stay with his wife and not see you?

Sorry I missed the original thread about this so not sure of the facts, but I would say if that is the case then you have to leave him alone and get on with your own life.

No more messages.

Have to get on with my life. God knows how. A very long sleep would suit me just fine now.

This is worse than before and worse than not having any contact and knowing nothing.

But I only have 2 choices and I have to pick one.

He told me why he wasn't replying when we stopped the first time.

It was never going to be that either of us would leave. It wasn't ever going to be anything other than a long distance contact.

You don't have any choices as far as I can see. He has made his decision and I think you need to respect that.

I know.

I will.

I wish I wasn't so bloody emotional about everything.

You do have the choice of leaving your dh if you are unhappy with him. You don't sound like you are though and he sounds very much like he loves you. It is just a serious case of grass is always greener I feel.

Big deep breath.

Have talked to Hubby. Cried some more.

I can do this.

I will move on.

I can do this x 4 million.

Your dh sounds lovely.

He is

Good luck NAB.

I have news.

Please no one faint.

Come on then spill.

Sorry, had to email a friend.

I have been feeling much better. I have to just get through a minute at a time. Can't wait to see Dh.

Got home. Checked email and nearly fainted when I had one. And you know what I WAS RELIEVED IT WASN'T HIM. That has to be progress, right?

My oldest pal giving me advice saying someone who is in your head is meant to be there. Not reading too much into that as HAVE made progress and can not bare to slip back.

Yes come on Nab I have children to sort out....

eek cross post - sorry!

Why don't you have a nice meal in tonight with your dh after the dc are in bed?

Just hang on to that positive feeling. That's good. These are very early days so don't be too hard on yourself if you feel yourself slipping a bit. BUT hurrah for positivety.

I can do this, can't I?

Making yummy chicken casserole - DH's fave.

You sound happier than this morning which is good.