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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Is it acceptable for a married man to call on a single woman after the pub shuts?

526 replies

harman · 08/12/2008 11:21

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motherinferior · 10/12/2008 11:54

Mr Inferior was out at a work do last night - it's Christmas so he's out at quite a few of them. 'Were there beautiful women there?' I enquired, as I usually do. 'Oh, yes, this time there actually were,' he said sounding quite pleased. 'Nice for you,' I said, meaning it, just before I fell asleep...

I've been Missis Jealousy in previous relationships, to everyone's great unhappiness. These days, I'm rather happier and more secure. Even had Christmas Decorations been admired, I really don't think I'd have been remotely bothered.

If, however, I was instructed to restrict my male company to my partner alone, I'd be livid.

notdoingthehousework · 10/12/2008 11:59

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daftpunk · 10/12/2008 12:01

twitteringbirds...maybe it's just my experience, but when i've been chatting to other men in pubs (doesn't happen often as i don't go out much) they always seem to have that look in their eye.

FioFio · 10/12/2008 12:03

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QueenTinselShadow · 10/12/2008 12:04

Next time, when a group of people, longstanding friends, or newer aquintances decide to go to somebodys house after the pub, for coffee, or more wine, the owner/occupier MUST REMEMBER TO ASK IF ALL PEOPLE PRESENT ARE MARRIED, AND THEN BARR ENTRANCE.....

Is that really done?

noiamnot · 10/12/2008 12:05

lol @ fio

but maybe daftpunk is just gorgeous?

twitteringbirds · 10/12/2008 12:08

Daftpunk, does being a bit glinty mean that you'd have to jump their bones though?

Obviously I'm not advocating you put yourself in a situation where things happen that you don't want to happen - and going alone back to a man's house after the pub may well be that situation (especially one with a glint in his eye!), but this isn't what has been outlined in the OP.

You do seem to be suggesting that all men want sex - or all men want sex with you? Not sure which?

chamomilequeen · 10/12/2008 12:10

it's just occurred to me - that infidelity stems from what happens (or doesn't happen) during the time couples are together rather than when they're apart, or with other people

FioFio · 10/12/2008 12:11

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noiamnot · 10/12/2008 12:12

but I wonder if anyone would be inviting him round for coffee....

FioFio · 10/12/2008 12:13

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motherinferior · 10/12/2008 12:13

Daftpunk, I can absolutely assure you that, as a former slapper, my expererience is not all men are after sex.

HolyGuacamole · 10/12/2008 12:15

twittering - I absolutely don't see it as scarlet woman behaviour. I don't make automatic assumptions of shagfest scenarios, flats, houses, or anything else (except in jest). I don't think the OP has anything to answer for and neither does the married man. I just think that we all have the right to run our relationships in the way that we feel is right for us without being criticised for it.

For me it is all a bit simpler. Some of us are cool with it and some of us aren't. Our reasons for being cool or not cool are endless and varied, therefor, to make judgements with limited knowledge (of those reasons good or bad) is, in my opinion, parochial. I totally understand the thread and quite frankly, even after your kind explanation, cannot see how the thread has descended into comments on being deserving of a vote or not....maybe a firmer argument could convince me, who knows? But, I do respect your opinion

Although I am shocked by some of the assumptions being made in some of the posts, this thread still makes very good reading (apart form the insults), it is obviously a very hot subject

daftpunk · 10/12/2008 12:16

i don't know what to say anymore.

fiofio....you can have him!

harman · 10/12/2008 12:17

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GraceGrapello · 10/12/2008 12:18

Wel I can remember at least ONE PERSON on the anti side on this thread going out for a drink at a pub with someone she fancied very much. And her h trusted her.

Mistletoe and wine anyone

noiamnot · 10/12/2008 12:19

had to laugh at that despite myself...

daftpunk · 10/12/2008 12:20

lol harmen...you've seen us!

chamomilequeen · 10/12/2008 12:21

harman, that's them on a good day...

harman · 10/12/2008 12:22

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noiamnot · 10/12/2008 12:22

obviously cham. I'd just had my makeup done and my monthly wash and curl at the hairdresser.

noiamnot · 10/12/2008 12:23

...

noiamnot · 10/12/2008 12:23

i'm off to get xmas tree...

maybe harman can loan me some of her decorations...

QueenTinselShadow · 10/12/2008 12:29

la dum di di dum

VeniVidiVickiQV · 10/12/2008 12:30

I think respect is about leaving your partner to decide whether they think something is appropriate or not, and behaving accordingly.

I think there is evidence of shriveled pudenda here.

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