PC & Kew - hope Nick wakes soon - though I too wonder if his body is keeping him asleep to give his brain more time to recover. It sounds positive that he is breathing unaided. Still praying for you. Why is PC likely to murder her Mum??
HW - hope H manages to see MIL - you mustn't blame yourself for not interfering years ago. MIL could only have been helped if she asked for it. The dreadful thing in these situations is that you have to sit by and watch, the most you could have done was let her know you were there if she needed a refuge. But if she was content - or too browbeaten - to make a stand against him, you had no alternative but to leave them to get on with it.
Try not to feel so bad about whether H loves as much as you do. Remember how he came back to you and how he keeps showing you that he wants to keep your marriage going. If that's not love, I don't know what is! If his feelings for his mother seem to be not so strong, that's understandable as he may have felt he had to batten down his love as an act of self-preservation. Otherwise it would have been too difficult to live with being separated from his mother and knowing that she was living with a tyrant. I'm glad you're feeling a bit better today
Fubsy, good luck with the valuations. I'm a bit addicted to the property programmes - I like fantasising about living in some of the gems they find in cheaper parts of the country - like the amazing Victorian villa on 'to buy or not to buy' yesterday morning, which cost less than ours is worth, and was twice as big with loads of lovely Original Features! I do think, though, that those programmes can damage the market as they do encourage buyers to make ridiculous offers. OK, we all like a bargain, but the seller needs to be able to move, too! When I was selling my flat, my buyer made a ridiculous offer initially, and when I refused, came back immediately with something nearer the asking price - so I knew he was just taking the piss (he was an estate agent himself, and a mere year after moving in, he put the flat back on the market for a HOOOge amount. It's been a great satisfaction to me, that he has been unable to sell . Especially as I found out from my ex-neighbour who still lives in the upstairs flat, that he abuses his girlfriend). As for the buyers of DP's flat, they arsed around so much trying to get the price lower and lower and lower, that in the end we had to call their bluff and say look just sign the contract or we will put the flat back on the market. If they'd pulled out, we would have lost our own house, but the bluff paid off.
So the moral is, stand your ground Fubsy, and if you can hang on till the Spring, the market may be better all round .
Baffy, you sound so much more positive these days. How is LO percolating? It must have been exhausting for you having DS ill and wakeful whilst having to continue your work. Is there any chance of reducing your hours to get some rest? I'll tell you a funny story about when I was going through the tired phase. When I was expecting DD, my office was next to the first aid room which had a comfy bed. I used to pop in there for a nap at lunchtimes. I never overslept because there'd be phones ringing or people coming and going. One day my boss was away, and it was a very quiet afternoon - no phonecalls, and as we were in the basement, no visitors. I slept on and woke up to find it was pitch dark . I was terrified that it might be after 7pm when the caretaker locked up. Luckily it was just 6.45, or else I would have had to spend the night there !
Things with DP continue to improve. He muttered something about not being allowed to leave last night, but I kept to my new resolve not to engage in his negative thoughts and ignored it, and the conversation moved back to positives, like finishing our bedroom makeover this weekend. He refused to let DD watch the TV - but as he'd let us watch Heroes the night before, that seemed fair enough. We've been looking after a friend's TV whilst they're away - it doesn't work terribly well, but without prompting, DP said why don't we try it upstairs, as there's a TV point in our room. Unfortunately it didn't work, but it was interesting that he himself tried to offer a solution to the problem of DD's and his relaxation conflicts. I think trying to develop our own individual spaces within this house may be a way forward, and I keep talking to DD about it so as to keep her on side. Of course, setting up TV and music will cost money we don't have, but it can be a long term aim, and if we can keep the spare room rented out, it's not impossible.
So - trying to keep positive.