I think my parents are very unfair about him

[Cyrodillian]

This is complicated and I somewhat understand my parents' reluctance to accept my new (rekindled) relationship, but I also think that they are very unfair.
My former foster brother and I have found each other again, and have started seeing each other. He only stayed with my family for a few years when we were both young and we developed a pretty strong sort of relationship back then. Once my parents realised he was removed and it was obviously very upsetting for both of us, and also for my parents.

I was mad at them for ages back then but as an adult I totally understand that this was the only right thing for them to do. But I find their attitude very offensive. Since then they have maintained that he was abusive and led me astray etc etc etc, which simply isn't true. We were both children, about the same age, there was no age or power imbalance. I spent some time thinking about this as I went through therapy for a different issue, and I genuinely don't believe that he did anything bad or that he "corrupted" me in any way.

It was very upsetting when it all came to an end I know that he suffered more than me as he was uprooted again and ran away trying to come back a few times until it stopped. When we reconnected he told me that he had sent me letters but that he never got a response and stopped after a while. I asked my parents about this and they confirmed that I had gotten letters but that they had thrown them away to let me move on.

We're both adults now, and the situation is obviously completely different, but my parents were abhorred when I told them that we had taken up contact again, and they keep bringing up these abuse and violence allegations and other stuff, and I got really mad at them earlier but I also feel guilty now.

I'm sorry OP but having sex with your foster brother at 11/12 is really not normal. Of course your parents were horrified and them still being upset now is perfectly reasonable.

You and he are now 30 odd and are not the same people you were as children. You are definitely romanticising what you had as children.

Please end it and continue with therapy as this early sexual relationship has probably warped your view of what a healthy adult relationship should be.

But look at how most people here have decided to condemn the boy and even called him an abuser, when he himself was a child and likely abused himself. Sometimes I really hate MN for the way that boys are always blamed by default.

The only thing that helps the OP is to advise her to proceed with caution as she ought to do with any other relationship.

I do think this is a bit more serious than ‘proceed with caution’ though. It’s a bit more complex and concerning than just dating a guy you just met from OLD I think. I think the fact that op wants to revisit this at all is really worrying.

Thank you. I don’t get this either.
Part of me wishes that I hadn’t posted this here but I will keep the feedback in mind even if I disagree with some of it.

Ok we’ll get her for sexual assault then.

The whole thing is ridiculous. It was two kids doing what they should not have been doing. Consentually.

I understand the parents upset. I would also be very upset. But in no way do I consider this rape.

reminds me of a story in our local press years ago. Two 15 year olds having sex. Girls parent finds out and goes to the police. Boy gets charged and put on the sex offenders register. I do believe the law needs to change. A child at 15 knows what they are consenting to and in this case there was no imbalance of power or force.

Parents are naturally very protective over children.