Do many couples attend routine medical and dental appointments together?

[momtoboys]

I have two sets of friends, both in female same sex marriages (which may not have any bearing), that attend all medical and dental appointments together. Including one of the couples goes into the dental appointment and sits next to her wife while she is in the chair having her teeth cleaned. I truly am not judging, it just never occurred to me to do that with my DH.

Do many couples do this?

Thanks.

No that’s weird.

No that's weird

I will admit I went with DH to routine dental appointments and made sure he went into the room, knew I would wait for him and come in if needed and would come in to take him home.
he has a severe dental phobia and needs diazepam just for check ups.
thanks to his dentist working hard with him l now only have to go if he needs dental work.
i would say without a phobia or similar genuine need of the other for simple routine stuff being in the same room at the time is well…..odd at best.

Weirdest thing ever. Routine GP and dental appointments? In the consultation itself? It would never occur to me.

We don't, and have appointments at different times in different months.

Love the perspective! Thanks for the laugh!

87 yo DPs go in to the doctor together so they both know what's going on.

But they wouldn't do the dentist together, that's just weird.

OP said that one of the couples goes into the dentist, not the doctors.

I didn’t really notice other people saying they go into the doctors office other than those with additional needs or disabilities.

I'm 40 and have never done that, don't know any friends who do either.

My friend takes her (medical malpractice barrister) husband to all her medical appointments as she finds she gets a much better service when he’s there funnily enough.
I’ve asked if she will loan him out but apparently he’s very busy.

Sorry. I consider dentists part of the doctors. My bad there

Err, no, because I’m a fully functioning adult, with agency over my own life!

Odd behaviour, unless there is some anxiety for either of them and they appreciate the support….

Not to the dentist or doctor, we're too busy to find time at the same time anyway. The only time I've accompanied DP was to A&E when he broke his elbow, and obviously pregnancy scans we've done together. Routine things I would just do when I can find an appointment available.

I only take my DH to appointments that require me to have procedures that require being released to an adult or mean that I can't drive myself home.

Saw this today when I was in doc surgery/ utterly weird that two old couples were in there together. Do they really have such empty lives that they need to attend together?

No , never . We both manage our own diaries & arrange our own !

Older couples sometimes attend with each other because of aspects of aging that can affect memory or other functions.

I'm old. DH is old. At this stage of our (very full lives, thank you), we do sometimes need the support of the other as our health issues steadily increase.

Absolutely weird

Yes, that’s how it worked for my parents. If one forgot something the other would hopefully remember it.

I know a couple friend of mine that does this. They always go together.

I always go alone. A few years back I was having a small lump removed (they were worried it was cancer) and my husband kept asking me do you want me to come with you and I said no just stay with the kids and once in the room I regretted it. But did I learn my lesson? No… 😂 a few years later I booked my surgery in such a manner than he and the kids were distracted and I (almost) went alone again 😂🤦‍♀️. Hopefully if I need anything else done I have learned my lesson

We attend routine dental appointments together (as in have consecutive, separate, appointments) because we have to travel over an hour in the car to get there, so it makes economic sense for us to both travel together in the same vehicle. If we went to a local dentist, then no, it would not be a shared experience!

No, i dont bring my dh with me. He might drive me because its a nightmare to park, but he doesnt get out of the car.

I do go with him sometimes, but only to drive if he is having treatment. I might go in with him, if he or the doc want me there.

No foot massages though. I am not sure i believe that. Do you ask if the dentist minds? Or just start?

I know a couple who does this and I find it really weird. They also go as a whole family to A&E too.
I did have a hospital appt yesterday and parking was a nightmare and I did find myself thinking of that couple and how handy it would be if DH could have dropped me off. But then I remember that, with that couple, there was once an anecdote about how they were both late for her appt due to parking and someone asked why her DH hadn’t dropped her off and she just looked very confused and then said that she needed to be there to help him park and then they’d have to go into the hospital together. As it was, it’s not a surprise that parking is bad so, after a quick check that they hadn’t magicked up another car park, I drove to the one a ten minute walk away as I’m capable of doing the walk so might as well leave the ones in the hospital car park for those that can’t.
DC1 is 16 and, for the past few years, I’ve been increasingly leaving her to speak to the GP etc in her appointments and she had started going in by herself. She’s got a few complicated things going on at the moment so I’m in with her but they usually ask me to leave for a few minutes so they can ask her about risk of being pregnant etc. We were saying after her appt last week that DS won’t be able to have the same build up as he’s 14 and hasn’t been to the GP since he was 3.

I think it depends. It one partner is very scared of the dentist or needs sedation, being accompanied makes sense. For a quick scale and polish it’s weird.

Doctors: again, it depends. If someone feels they aren’t being listened to then having a partner there can help you to get better treatment. I took my mother once in desperation (in my 20s). But for any regular check ups it’s odd.

DD2 used to get really offended in her teens, by GPs banging on about sex! She was going about endometriosis, and every appointment they asked her, if she was in a sexual relationship. She didn’t believe in sex before marriage then, and in fact was never sexually attracted to anyone. Patients shouldn’t have to discuss being asexual with GPs, who are making assumptions, based on the majority!

I finally went with her, to ask for a referral to a gynaecologist, because I’d seen lots of mature women with endometriosis at an infertility clinic myself, and I didn’t want her to go through what they did.