It’s weird to refer to your spouse as your best friend.

[joseline]

Why do many of y’all refer to your spouse as best friends ? Your husband or your wife is the one person that can betray you the most, poison you, even kill you.

but besides that, when you are with your spouse, you sort of have to perform and be at least close to perfect. You have to stay fit to keep them attracted to you, have to be good in bed or otherwise they will mock you, if you are a man you gotta have the biggest member possible and as a woman you gotta have the best looking behind possible. You have to do grand gestures wether it’s gifts, trips, dates or else.

and let’s also talk about bad times. If you get severely ill and need to be hospitalised and cared for. Even worst, if you have cancer. Chances are they gonna dump you at the worst possible time. It’s not guaranteed that they will have your back. Heck, when women get pregnant the men often loses attraction even if the men doesn’t dump her right away or cheat on her (which he will). And if a man gets severely ill and need to be hospitalised, the woman will dump him.

overhaul, this whole love thing is a fairytale fantasy. That doesn’t exist in marriage. It only exist in family and friends.

when you are with your friends, you can just let loose and be your flawed self and you won’t get judged for it. When you are with your actual best friend you can confide in them and be vulnerable and you won’t get judged.

why do many refer to their spouses as best friends ? They can’t be. Spouses can stab you in the back. Specially now in 2026

Whoop whoop - Incel alert - whoop whoop

He’s not my best friend, the position of best friend was filled on my first day of school in 2003, but he’s up there.

He’s definitely my friend. Even if we weren’t married I would still consider him my friend - even if we get divorced we have three kids so we will have to be in each others lives. My mum and dad spent 40 years married and then got divorced, but if you saw them you’d never know they were married and have 6 kids you’d just think they were mates. If you marry and have kids with someone it’s advantageous to be their friend because you are stuck with them. And it’s not just 18 years, you’re gonna see them at birthdays, weddings, big family events… you will probably share grandchildren with them.

when you are with you spouse, you sort of have to perform and be at least close to perfect

What? I don’t. My husband is the person I’m the most myself with. I don’t perform anything.

have to be good in bed or otherwise they will mock you

You have only dated dickheads. This cannot be what you think every marriage is??

You ok hun?

I’m guessing all this is based on a sample of, what? Two people you know? One? You?

And suddenly you’re generalising about every other relationship on the planet and bilging out a weird list of what we all apparently do and say, as though you’re bestowing trufax upon us rather than your own narrow and bitter opinions.

But thanks for the heads up. Y’all are quite the little ray of sunshine on a Thursday morning.

Well you marry them because they’re your best friend I hope!! They’re the person you want to turn to for comfort, to be there for bad times and to have a laugh with. They’re the one you want to be there if something awful happens and vice versa. Op people slag off namalt but honestly they’re not, there’s psycho men out there and psycho women too

I give up!

Are you okay?

Well my DH was my best friend for years and then we started dating. Here we are more than twenty years later, children grown up and me and my best friend are back exploring and having adventures. No harsh reality here. Nothing guaranteed of course, but when is it in life.

I'm sorry for whatever you're going through or been through {mention:joseline}@joseline,do yo u want to talk about what happened to you?

The question seems very rhetorical so I'm not sure how to answer.

Oh well, at least you’re not bitter.

Love that saying! I’ve never heard it before

Has school been called off today OP? Why don't you find something useful to do instead?

Wow. Someone is super bitter today 😲. Non-spousal best/friends have been stabbing in the back too since time immemorial (heard of Judas and Brutus?). And do you also laugh at those posters who's spouses have cheated on them with their "best friends"?? Don't laugh at people's misery. Karma is a bitch. It feels like seeing someone unhappy and miserable is what keeps you happy and feeling alive OP! It's very sad.

If this is your experience of relationships, you are doing it wrong.

You seem very jaded OP.

20 years in with DP, and the love hasn't faded yet. No, we're not married, but I really doubt that would make any difference to how much I loved her or she loves me.

And this bit - when you are with your spouse, you sort of have to perform and be at least close to perfect.

DP is the one person I can just be entirely, completely me with and not feel I have to "perform" at all.

I actually agree with your original point that spouses and best friends are different, I get entirely different things from my relationships with my friends than I do with DP. But unlike you, I trust my partner completely. Yes, there's a chance she could hurt me, but thats equally true of any friendship.

My dh wouldn’t poison or kill me. He’s the one I go to with anything, the person I can be myself with and not act. I wouldn’t necessarily walk around proclaiming him my best friend but he is.

What is this nonsense OP ? Who on earth performs and tries to be perfect around their spouse 😂
Presumably you've never had a relationship.

This thread is weird. Of course your partner can be your best friend and yes op, even “best friends” can betray you. Bizarre.

Why does the that make you laugh, would you rather a good old honest poisoning?
This is the weirdest post I’ve ever seen, well done.

I met my dh more than 37 years ago. He has always been my bestest friend, through bereavements, joys, children, in childbirth he looked away when I pooped. We have tackled our ups and down together, embrace our wrinkles and grey hairs and I still see the handsome blonde I first met and he still sees my 29 year old self, despite our self deprecating comments.

I think you may need to raise your bar op.

You have a very unhealthy view of relationships.

I don’t ageee with anything in your post at all.

Another weird ragebait thread. They’re coming daily at the moment.

Well then you're pretty horrible and spiteful, aren't you?

Aren't they just?!