Has anyone found ChatGPT too sympathetic towards an ex?

[Asq]

I have started using chat GPT to go over my relationship with my ex as certain things still bother me a lot and I never had anyone to talk to about it at the time. I have started using chat GPT to write down how I felt and go over situations I felt were wrong, but it often seems to “side” with him, I don’t know if that’s the correct term but it often seems to sympathise a lot with him. Is this normal? I have even said to it a few times that I felt like it was siding with him. I don’t want to say what the things are as the great reason for chat GPT is it doesn’t judge me for things, but is this anyone else’s experience?

Heavens

No one has been “vile” to you on this thread and yet you’ve got yourself worked and defensive.

You even have done the same with ChatGPT because it hasn’t been saying what you damn well wanted it to say.

You don’t want to actually process this and move on for your own sake and the sake of your children - you just want people and ChatGPT to say “you were right and the ex was as wrong. The end”

But op you think people on this thread have been “vile” to you.

Is it possible that you are one to always see yourself as a victim?

I’m not talking about this thread, sorry if you’ve misunderstood I meant people have judged me in the past when I’ve posted on here and I’ve said that already a few times throughout the thread that I’ve been judged when I’ve posted about my ex on here and yes some people were openly vile and I would say bullying behaviour

it’s interesting that when there are threads on this, overwhelmingly people who use chat gpt find it useful. People who don’t tell them they are wrong to find it useful. Given this profound lack of listening, I wonder how they think they are illustrating that talking to a human is better?

Therapists are trained in techniques. Chat gpt is feeding off that. It’s using the same techniques a human would.

Humans are often crap therapists. I know this from experience. It’s very common to hear people say they did not find a therapist helpful, or even found them harmful. It’s also worth remembering that the human to human relationship in therapy is a deeply transactional based on payment. See how much your therapist cares about you if you stop paying them.

sure a highly skilled therapist will be better for some people and their specific needs. But ChatGPT better suits where I am at than a human. It just does.

You have had to ignore everything I have told you about my actual experience to continue in your viewpoint.

You really can’t persuade me that something I have repeatedly found very helpful has not been.

Not this thread! Please learn to read I said when I posted about my ex.

used it to look at a relationship issue with DW as I had no one to discuss it with, didn’t find it sided with her in particular, it probably validated how I was feeling and the concerns I had but if she’d put her side in , I imagine it would have done the same for her

The research, involving humans who use it, is informative.

You really can’t persuade me that something I have repeatedly found very helpful has not been.
You are right that no one can persuade you, no one can ever persuade another person.

etc, so I’m not worried about thinking it’s a me issue I know it isn’t

so if you think you had no role to play in the breakdown, when you say you are trying to process this what you really mean is you’re trying to understand your ex and why he behaved as he did?

I had no one to talk about it to at the time, I told friends some things but not everything and I want to discuss the things he did since I had no one to talk about them to at the time

Try deepseek. It’s much better than chat gpt . I find chat gpt argumentative and patronising

If I were you…… I would seek counselling. Either NHS via your gp/self-referred (if in the UK) or paid. It will definitely help.
Whilst there be sure to also discuss your attempts to use a robot to help.

I will use another one thanks.

not doing counselling had it in the past when I was younger and they just sit there and listen, that’s not for me. Felt like I was talking to myself and often felt weird after the sessions. Might work for others though.

That first sentence was clearly meant to be a put down. An attempt at shaming and humiliation. The irony of you using this technique whilst your case is based on the power of human relations and empathy. Your undermining your own case. But acting bang on type with other posters who make deliberate attempts at cruelty and shaming to those who find benefit in using chatgpt. Maybe if there were research on the humans who do this, that would be informative too. I don't need that research though. I think the psychology of these humans is pretty clear.

Your last sentence is just bizarre. Yes, humans can persuade other humans of the truth of something. That's how human civilisation and progress works.

No it doesn't. It's a machine. It doesn't feel anything.

It sounds like you're having a really rough time, but obsessing over it to chat gpt doesn't seem like a healthy coping mechanism.

If your ex was a dick (and if you say he was then I believe you), nothing can undo it or make it OK. You just have to find a way of continuing to live in spite of it. If you prefer online talking that can be done at home and in your own time, an online cbt course might be more productive.

I think what’s concerning here is you’re talking bout chat gpt like it’s a person and there is real thought going on. There is not. It’s a computer program that generates sentences in response to what’s entered. And slants it based on the nuance of what’s asked.

I’m aware it’s not real don’t worry.

You don’t think using AI is like talking to yourself?

Not really, only if it didn’t respond 🤣

Ok it’d just the words you’re using about it being sympathetic, not judging etc in images otherwise.

I just don’t know how else to word it

This

OP, I have some sympathy with you having just been through a very traumatic break up which blindsided me. I started using ChatGPT over the past month to process how I was feeling and did find some of its responses helpful.

But… I soon realised it’s a really unhealthy way to deal with difficult emotions. You’re already trying to what happened in the relationship and now you’re trying to de-code ChatGPT too. It’s exhausting!

Of course you can’t just stop thinking about him. You’re brain is quite literally hardwired to have a hit of dopamine when you think about him, when you look back through messages and photos, when you check out his social media…. You’re no different to an addict suffering from withdrawal. The only way to move on is to be sad about it, cry when you need to, accept that it hurts like hell, but then slowly start to focus on building a new life for yourself, a new better version of you.

The relationship is over. No amount of ChatGPT telling you why it’s over will change that. Sometimes you have to just accept that you’ll never get the answers to your questions.

I found that journaling has helped. I wrote a letter to him that I’ll never send. And I’d recommend watching Sabrina Zohar on FB for a better understanding of what your brain is doing. Trust me, it does get easier. Be kind to yourself.

Thank you, I don’t plan to stop using it as despite what I’ve said I have actually found it helpful in some ways.

It 'feels sorry for him' because you feel sorry for him. I bet it is picking up certains ways you talk about your ex and applying it back to you. It's a language learning model after all. You might not even realise you're doing it.

Don’t you dare complain when you live in a desert.