Political Differences

[bananagrama]

Do you and your partner have different political opinions? Do you know any couples that do?
Do you think a relationship can work if you don’t agree on this subject (in the broadest sense, obviously no two people agree on everything).

I won’t say specifically what we disagree on but I don’t want to discount a new partner on the basis of this alone, as I like lots of other things about him but find it hard to talk about.

How strange that Mumsnet posted my comment 4 times!

I wouldn’t date someone with very different political views to mine. My red line would be a reform supporter. Right or wrong, i’d end it straight away as no chance i’d even want to be friends with a reform supporter, let alone a relationship. We wouldn’t be compatible so what would the point be.

For me that’s exactly how it is. I can’t be with someone who I don’t align with on core values.

It’s less important to others but for me it’s one of the most important things.

I just can’t imagine building a life with someone who thinks/feels fundamentally differently to be on key issues.

Yes we do. I’m an ex-Labour activist who votes for centre left parties, although in recent years I have become increasingly sceptical about toxic, divisive identity politics.

DP is a Thatcherite conservative who believes in small government, big tax cuts, even bigger benefit cuts & privatisation. He has libertarian social views, eg he supported same sex marriage.

It works fine because we each respect one another’s views and have the intellectual self-confidence to agree to differ on some issues. Isn’t that what most intelligent, well-educated adults do?

I think this explains how some people are with people with completely different views. Some people clearly don't even discuss politics when dating. I couldn't imagine not talking about it - it's so intertwined with everything important in life. It's not an extra add-on. But I do see/work with people who never really think about politics except in a very surface level. Which is fine if that works for them. But I could never have stuck with someone who had no real political views and didn't talk about them.

I couldn’t, but my career is linked to politics and it’s part of my identity.

I'm conservative NOT far right and Farage makes me very worried for the UK. I've never kissed a leftie and never would. DH and I share values. We believe in personal responsibility a free market and a safety net for those who need it genuinely. Neither of us are that fussed about immigration.

DH & I have very different views, he’s a Thatcherite Tory, I’m a Gordon Brown Labour person & Party member. We’ve been married 35 years. Since Brexit the gap has closed considerably. But I haven’t moved 😂.

At the end of the day, our political views just reflect our core moral beliefs. That’s why it really matters to me what my partner stands for. I divorced my ex because he was an abusive, entitled twat—and while it might be a total coincidence, he happened to adore Putin, Johnson, and Trump 😆

I totally agree . Born in the early 60’s and politics have always been important to me

Don’t give up hope, some of them must be desperate.

Me and DH broadly agree on most things and have similar values. There are some things we disagree on - like the death penalty for example (I am against full stop, he would allow it in very limited circumstances).
The most important thing for me is that he will listen to my point of view and consider it even if he end up not agreeing though.
We often vote the same but sometimes have voted differently. We both voted remain for Brexit but he was less bothered than I was

I’d say it’s because people in the left are less capable of understanding that good, moral people exist across the political spectrum.

I think people have very different ideas on morality and good.

I have no doubt there are good people who have been swept up in right wing rhetoric and hateful policies. Still don’t want to shag rhem.

I don't think you necessarily need to vote the same way, but political choices ultimately boil down to values, and if your values are fundamentally misaligned, then I can't see how a relationship would last. Particularly if you want to have children, as you need to be able to agree on how to raise them.

There are plenty of things that DH and I disagree on, but our fundamental world views are aligned and I wouldn't want to be with him if they weren't.

This is going to offend some, but it’s my belief so I’ll write it.

My husband is incredibly intelligent, and it’s great. If he fell for anything Farage said I’d find it impossible to cope with. I’d wonder what had happened to his brain.

Reform are the line in the sand for most people I guess.

Sadly, no.

My partner is more right wing than me and sees a lot of reform that appeals to him but he’s a firm conservative. I’m a left of centre Labour supporter. My absolutely red line is a green supporter and someone who actively goes on Palestinian marches. I absolutely couldn’t both of those would be immediate relationship ending for me