Me and dh have been married for 25 years. He is 51 and has been having erectile disfunction for a while but completely unable to get a errection for two years now.
I have asked him repeatedly to go to the Dr and he did about 6 months ago. Was given some tablets but they didn't work. Before this he was buying tablets off love honey but they didn't work either. The Dr said if this didn't work he could try injections. They would be into his privates so he will never go for that.
He still tries to initiate sex, but I have told him he needs to go back to the gp. He doesn't do anything to try to seduce me or date nights etc. Just suggests sex which is often disappointing. He does do other things in bed but I struggle to get past him not seeking more help. I get he is embarrassed but I feel I'm not worth him feeling uncomfortable for. This with lack of seduction and only touching me when we have sex isn't working for me.
I tried talking to him yesterday and he is always instantly making excuses in difficult conversations. So he tried to think of reasons to explain it away and shut the conversation down like " I will go back to the Dr" when he has only gone once in two years. Then when I pointed that out he gets louder so I feel like he is shutting me down.
He clearly still wants sex, but just shit sex on his terms with no conversations on how to improve things. I'm 52 and my desire for sex is zero as it is. But trying to find a solution for his sake. The conversation ended with him shouting at me. I asked if we could talk but it's always me bringing up the fact he can't get it up but I can't solve that.
Right now the options are shit sex that doesn't work for me or nothing. Ie everything on his terms. I'd happily never have sex again after years of this. He'd rather that than talk about it.