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Relationships

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Are you happily married?

127 replies

IcyRubyHiker · 15/02/2026 17:16

I would love to hear from anyone really!

Who is really, truly, happily married?

Who is just indifferent and has decided to put up with it / is staying for the kids? Who has lost the romance and is just avoiding the upheaval of leaving?

Is the idea of being happily married just unrealistic?

I am married but we are not in a romantic relationship. We are more of a domestic partnership / financially it is easier than being single… and I have no idea if I am the only one… I’m pretty sure we are both just going along with it because no one wants to rock the boat / blow up our child’s settled home life.

How does anyone who just has a ‘fine’ marriage ever have the courage to do anything about it, or even leave?

OP posts:
Safarisagoody · 03/06/2026 06:54

I always find these threads , and there has been many, not realistic, often over romanticised, as just no one is wandering around in the first flush of love after many years together, as some posters are basically indicating. I’ve never ever met anyone where that’s the case.

I love my husband, I’m happily married, I’ve been with him 37 years since I was 20, we have been through some rough times, not in terms of the relationship, but life, and some good times, we are content. We support each other if and when required, and are a happy family unit with our now adult child. We talk and we communicate.

is it perfect, no of course not, we seldom argue, but it does happen, we can disagree, generally about minor shit like taking the bins out,

do I have a good marriage, yes I do, if I was to give you one bit of advice, is romance fades, love is whay endures.

do you love each other, not care for, like, but love. Is there support, communication, mutual goals, kindness, do you have independence when required.

because that’s what matters, if those things don’t exist, then it is better for the marriage to end, but if there is love, kindness, support, etc, then romance isn’t what it’s all about.

AnonymouseDad · 03/06/2026 08:09

We had got to that point after 20 years. I think a lot of people do.
Some things happened and we came very very very close to divorce. Then we stopped and realised there is only us. Its always been us.
She was the one i wanted to talk to about how I was feeling as was I to her.
We did have counselling and that helped a bit. We also found a couples app that really worked. It asked each of us questions daily and got us thinking about stuff we didnt realise about our needs and wants.
Now we both take every monday off work and have day dates. We sit and watch stuff snuggled together in the evenings and laugh a lot more.
I wouldnt want to be with anyone else. And thats what she says to me too. Sex picked up too and we even tried new things. We've gone away for weekends just us two.
It took a big big kick up the arse to happen but I can honestly say we are happy.

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