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Original poster

Husband walked out of his job issue

135 replies

Flowers76 · 06/02/2026 13:04

We are both 55..My husband has walked out of his job , as they have given him a report saying due to his attitude and adruptness with his words and lack of completing certain jobs correctly they haven given him a warning. If it does continue then it will be a displinary matter..
Well basically he told them where go go ! Literally..

He had this so many times before with previous jobs.i was really hoping this was different as nearly been it it a year.
And yes he does have issues with his attitude, hes the type of bloke that thinks its everyone elses issue..not his..
Weve just sorted our selves out finacially as well, im so mad...
Becouse weve been here before im getting tired of it now..so now again pressures on me to pay all the bills...i cant support him orveven speak to him as so mad , am i wrong ? Ive stuck at jobs in past that reduced me to tears but never walked until i had another job lined up..i would never walk as got bills to pay...just feel like getting to old for all this crap..

OP posts:
ednaclouda · 06/02/2026 22:13

PineappleMelon · 06/02/2026 13:31

Could you be better off without him?

thats not helping is it

Pipsquiggle · 06/02/2026 22:23

What kind of job does he do / which sector?

I am sorry you are going through this @Flowers76
Does he take all constructive criticism in this way?
At 55 and being given consistent feedback from several different employers you would have thought he'd have the emotional intelligence to do something about it.

GoldenPearls · 06/02/2026 22:25

How is he with you? Do you have children? Do you wait on arms and foot to his desires??

pedropascalslittlefinger · 06/02/2026 22:49

I used to be married to someone like this. I finally cut him out and I haven’t looked back.

Imisscoffee2021 · 06/02/2026 23:35

Flowers76 · 06/02/2026 14:07

Well hes spent the day in bed so far, with a headache, while im off soon to my second job.
He wants me to say it going to be okay dont worry, i cant!
He needs a job that wont give him negative feedback.

For last few years this has been a issue regarding his jobs...

Any job can be one that gives no negative feedback ... if your behave in a professional and nice manner to the people around you while doing the job. You don't even have to be stellar at a job if you can simply be courteous to people, it's on him to control that in future.

selffellatingouroborosofhate · 06/02/2026 23:46

AnotherHormonalWoman · 06/02/2026 18:27

The only excuse that I know of for this is Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, which often comes with neurodiversity, but I am TIRED of everybody saying "Maybe he's neurodiverse" to explain men doing shitty things, and funnily enough ND women with RSD don't tend to have the same issue biting their tongue so I lose sympathy🙄

In fairness, I do have this problem holding my tongue, but I've never walked out of a job.

Crikeyalmighty · 07/02/2026 00:00

Zov · 06/02/2026 20:54

Not gonna lie @Flowers76 I'd be gone if I were you. Your husband appears to bring nothing to your life but stress and headaches. He sounds immature and irresponsible. I could never stay with a man who thought it was a good idea to jack in his job/walk out of his job, (with no job to go to,) because he CBA, or is finding a bit 'stressful.' He would be showing he doesn't give a fuck about our financial security or how it affects me and our children, and is happy to throw us into the financial mire.

Women put up with ALL kinds of shit in life. Stresses raising the kids and juggling the work-life balance, holding down a job, looking after elderly and infirm parents, doing all the grunt work, domestic tasks, general day to day drudgery, and most of the childcare, and we just fucking get on with it. We don't walk away, or jack it in. We stick it out. Most men do fuck-all except go to work, so if a man can't even be arsed to hold down a job 'because it's a bit stressful or boring' when he's got very little else to do in life, he can fuck off. I don't want him. I don't need him.

I do agree- with most women I know it all seems somewhat one sided

ByUniqueViper · 07/02/2026 08:36

Im not sure how you can be with such a person. If this is his behaviour at work I suspect hes the same at home?
Were similar ages to you and have had some financial struggles over the years, but everything is pretty steady now. Who wants or needs a load of upset and uncertainty at our age.
I would have lost any respect for this man a long time ago.

cacboi · 07/02/2026 17:46

My husband sounds similar in many ways, and eventually we arrange for an assessment which confirmed my suspicions - he is on the Autistic Spectrum. This explained a lot of his issues over interactions with other people.

Dextersgoneovertherainbowbridge · 07/02/2026 17:53

What is the point of him?

ByKeenTaupeDreamer · 07/02/2026 18:21

PerspicaciaTick · 06/02/2026 13:44

Most men with attitude and anger issues are able to keep a lid on it at work. They'll speak to their families in a way they'd never speak to a colleague.
If your husband can't even control himself at work, it makes me wonder just how badly he treats you behind closed doors.

Give him a break I've had some horrible employers aswell maybe it's them picking on him pure shame .

House12 · 07/02/2026 18:59

Flowers76 · 06/02/2026 14:07

Well hes spent the day in bed so far, with a headache, while im off soon to my second job.
He wants me to say it going to be okay dont worry, i cant!
He needs a job that wont give him negative feedback.

For last few years this has been a issue regarding his jobs...

He doesn’t need a job that won’t give him negative feedback, he needs to climb down off the pedestal he’s got himself on. What a brat. Why are men so emotional?!

BeddysMum · 07/02/2026 19:13

I'm so sorry to hear that. He needs an attitude adjustment but it's not your job to do it, or bail him out.

I've been in your position before, trying to gently coach ex husband into not freaking out and quitting jobs, suggesting coaching, therapy, coping mechanisms etc. I was unsuccessful because they have to want to change, and he didn't.

Sounds like he may have a lot of repressed anger. Maybe you could nudge him in the direcrion of Andy's Man Club. They are brilliant.

Otherwise sending hugs and a reminder to take care of yourself.

SpringTimeIsRingTime · 07/02/2026 19:34

Is he neurodiverse?

Windday · 07/02/2026 19:37

I have heard of women like you, living on the edge, always being the parent in the relationship, whilst he is a petulant man child with a bad attitude.

How long have you wasted on him?
What a waste of a life.
Time to go it alone.
You will be working until your 70's with him, get out while you can.

echt · 07/02/2026 19:40

ByKeenTaupeDreamer · 07/02/2026 18:21

Give him a break I've had some horrible employers aswell maybe it's them picking on him pure shame .

Show quote history

Have you bothered reading the OP's OP?

Or are you the husband?

WhichTyler · 07/02/2026 19:41

Maybe he'd benefit from counselling

SanFranBear · 07/02/2026 19:42

Sounds like my ExH - he did this several times during our relationship and it was horrendous ever single time!

I've heard from my DC that he's done it at least twice since he left and whilst i have a slight pang for his gf, the peace in knowing it is nothing to do with me anymore is blissful!I

I'd be off, OP - once it's just about understandable if it's simply an untenable situation but when it's a pattern, as this so clearly is, run a mile. He sounds pretty horrible, too - always blaming others and not taking any responsibility. Horrible flashbacks!

Retiredfromearlyyears · 07/02/2026 19:43

He is dead weight and hes not getting any younger for conquering the job market! Offload him! He sounds horrible anyway!

Allergictoironing · 07/02/2026 19:47

FFS can we stop with the ND excuses?

I have ADHD off the scale, and I've walked out of one job ever in my life (I was having a full blown breakdown due to the pressures of that role). Yes I can be very sensitive to criticism but I've learned to hide it & just crack on as being single with a mortgage means no job = no home so you have to. Even when a job has been almost unbearable I wouldn't leave until I had something lined up.

The only way to be employed without some criticism is to be 100% perfect, and to be honest not even then as there will always be someone who doesn't like the way you stir your tea, or thinks your lunch is smelly, or doesn't like the way you dress.

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 07/02/2026 19:53

Why would he need a job when you have two? He needs kicking to the curb. You’ll function better without him.

Original poster
Flowers76 · 07/02/2026 19:59

Thank you all your replies.
Were not actually talking at the moment as he said im not supporting him etc etc
i suggested change of job sector , currently in warehouse sector, maybe try somthing new...fact i have made it clear hes has put money worries on my shoulders now, im stressed how to find next months rent. I told him all jobs get feedback.
But in his eyes hes is perfect employee and company is picking on him...but since theres a track record here now defintly with last few jobs he had same issue, he didnt like way he was spoken to ( in every job, he has walked) Anything i suggested hasnt gone down well.
Just finally got ourseves on our feet too.
It has exhauted me ..mentally exhaused me.

OP posts:
dementedmummy · 07/02/2026 20:02

Flowers76 · 07/02/2026 19:59

Thank you all your replies.
Were not actually talking at the moment as he said im not supporting him etc etc
i suggested change of job sector , currently in warehouse sector, maybe try somthing new...fact i have made it clear hes has put money worries on my shoulders now, im stressed how to find next months rent. I told him all jobs get feedback.
But in his eyes hes is perfect employee and company is picking on him...but since theres a track record here now defintly with last few jobs he had same issue, he didnt like way he was spoken to ( in every job, he has walked) Anything i suggested hasnt gone down well.
Just finally got ourseves on our feet too.
It has exhauted me ..mentally exhaused me.

There is a great post from jade on Dave Ramsay's show around if you need money, get a job, any job.its not the time to be picky. He needs to get over himself and get out to work.

gardenflowergirl · 07/02/2026 20:12

Would he have done that if you weren't there to pay the bills? As an adult you do what you have to do to pay the bills, but sounds like he doesn't think he has to. Seriously consider what this guy brings to your relationship.

VoltaireMittyDream · 07/02/2026 20:16

Xerp · 06/02/2026 14:17

I work in HR in an industry that often attracts men who thinks the world, and organisation, revolves around them.

I’ve dealt with a number of men like your husband. Not even to disciplinary level, but men who will throw a tantrum and resign on the spot at the slightest hint of criticism. Typically, they’re well able to criticise the work of others, but can’t take it themselves.

It’s always the wife I feel sorry for. I figure if someone can behave like that in work, they have to even more difficult at home. Plus, I imagine it’s the wife picking up the financial slack as these men job hop with no safety net.

I’m sorry OP, he’s a knob.

…software engineers, by any chance?

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