Would you continue this relationship?

[EagerTaupePlayer]

I think I know what most posters will say but would like opinions. I’ll try and give as many details as possible without it being revealing.

Relationship relatively recent and I live in a different city from partner. Partner lives in a different city for work. Last week he got arrested for ABH. He apparently got into an argument with another bloke outside a pub that escalated. He apparently hit the bloke over the head with a metal pipe and bit him. He claims it was self-defence as the bloke went for him first. He also apparently resisted arrest and had to be brought to the ground by police and rear cuffed. No drugs or alcohol involved. He was the only one arrested, the other bloke was not although he (the victim) did have to go to hospital.

He was held in custody for 21 hours and has been released on pre charge conditional bail. He has to go back to the police station next month.

He claims that it was all self-defence and a response to him being hit first. I have never seen him be violent before so it was a big shock when he told me. My friends that I’ve spoken to in real life are a bit divided, some think that it could be dropped as he hasn’t been charged yet but he claims the victim is supporting prosecution.

WWYD?

You definitely did the right thing.
He’s very obviously got a very violent side to his character.
I’d hate to know the history of this Jekyll and Hyde.

Sounds dodgy to me. I'd be out of there if it is an early relationship. I don't think it matters if he gets charged or not. He walked past a pub and got into an extreme fight. Not good.

Well done! You are only 20, so many years to go and chalk this one up to a bad experience.
I remember a friend of mine met someone like this - said he was sober, always happened to be walking past a pub….
The last straw was when he smashed her windows in.
These men are violent, no matter their background or education.
Take good care of yourself and keep trusting your intuition.

Good on you, OP. Violence of any kind is never ever OK. If someone is willing to be violent then it is someone you do not want in your life.

Am glad you got out.

JFC.
On one hand good news its over... on the other hands....yikes!

Do the freedom programme before you date anyone else

He says bloke started shouting and swearing accusations at him that he was looking at him out of the blue so partner started shouting and swearing back at him.

That's not self defence, that's antagonising someone. Self defence would be walking away.

Basically they are saying that if he isn’t charged, it becomes justified because he was protecting himself according to police/cps.

Not quite. What happens is the police take statements from witnesses including the victim, any observers and the police officers themselves who were involved. They interview the suspect to get their version of events. They then send it all to the CPS who decide whether or not he should be charged.

Now this decision is a bit of an economical one, rather than who they believe is right. All the CPS look at is 'is it worth the cost of a prosecution' ie if there were no witnesses or the case is likely to fail then they won't take it to court because it would be a waste of money. They make the decision based on the evidence put forward by the police. People are bailed so that the police have time to collect and collate the evidence.

So if he is charged it will be because the CPS believe there is enough evidence to secure a conviction and if he is not charged it will be because they think there isn't enough evidence. It's actually nothing to do with whether they think he's guilty or not.

Just seen your update OP x