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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Did you do 'checks' on a new boyfriend? (Eg disclosure schemes)

151 replies

GreyCarpet · 12/09/2025 07:50

I didn't.

I've had cause to check someone before (not someone I was dating) and work in a safeguarding role so I'm not oblivious but I'd known him for several years as a friend and wouldn't have dated him if I'd felt the need to check.

He asked me outright a couple of weeks ago if I had (we were discussing the case which brought about Claire's Law). I was a bit surprised by the question, tbh.

And he seemed quite surprised that I hadn't but accepted that I wouldn't have dated him if I'd thought I had any reason specifically to do so. He'd assumed I just would have done given the level of violence against women and children.

I just wondered if it was something many women did really.

OP posts:
Chilliprawnpls · 13/09/2025 16:54

bittertwisted · 13/09/2025 15:12

And having applied and got one I am pretty sure I know what I’m talking about

I don’t know you from Adam and nor does anyone on mumsnet

fact is… the actual published priests and indeed the statistics say that your experience is either made up by yourself OR the police didn’t adhere with the published process

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