Photo posted of children without my consent

[OneCalmReader]

Hi,
I recently posted about my Narcissistic MIL. She had got angry about me not posting a photograph of her hijacking my two DDs first look at my wedding. She ruined part of my day by sabotaging a first look between my DDs and she can’t seem to understand why I am upset about it and she decided to call me horrible names and say things to belittle me.
Well, yesterday she changed her profile photo on Facebook to the photo I never wanted to post. It wasn’t supposed to happen and she had access to it from a private album of our wedding photos. Where do I stand with this? I have reported it to Facebook for violating my privacy as I haven’t given her consent to post an image of myself and my children, but I haven’t heard anything back yet. I’m just not sure how to take further action.

I think the strongest stance is silence. Go low contact and don't rise to her. Let her play her games but rise above.

Two of them look like they're giggling behind their hands. I don't think that bodes well for the bride's look.

The two of you sound like you deserve each other.

Lost me at having a content creator at your wedding.

Oh well everyone will have seen it by now

its just one of many wedding photos….you in a presumably white ish dress 🤷‍♀️

If you also post these photos on SM I think you’re being petty.

And first looks are between a bride and groom. Did you cut the cake and have a first dance with your daughters too?

Birth photography is huge these days. Especially in Aus and the U.S.

I no longer understand this world that has been created. It's become a far more complicated and more stressful unhappy place than it needs to be.
You are really overthinking this and making yourself more miserable in the process. You cannot control everything. Life is not insta perfect. So, it was a bit annoying that your mil walked in at the wrong time, but what's done is done and ultimately, all she's done is post what she sees as a nice photo of you and her grandchildren/child online.
Is this really the sort of relationship that you want going forward with her? I couldn't be bothered with all that drama.

Once I read this I realised you’re acting like a child and lost all sympathy for you.

Can anyone show me the posts were people got triggered by the mention of a content creator at a wedding please? I mean, I can imagine people pissing themselves laughing or rolling their eyes, but has anyone said they were “triggered”? How very bizarre!

Also, is anyone else feeling sorry for the newly wed husband here??? He must be wondering what on earth he’s got himself into!

OP, you sound nuts!

Also, is anyone else feeling sorry for the newly wed husband here?

Absolutely not. If you read the OP's other thread about him, you won't feel anything other than contempt for him.

Only in Aus and US.
I've never heard of its happening here.

Hang on - the 11yo CHILD requested the first look photo from the content creator? An eleven year old? But the MIL took her own photo of her grandchildren having their first look and put it on her own FB? And the mum is angry with her for this?

So really this is about IP rights? Nothing to do with children’s privacy being invaded or lack of parental consent? It’s just a dispute over WHO took the photos of the children - a grandmother, or a paid content creator at the actual request of said child.

(I just need a moment to collect myself: an 11yo child requesting that a photo of her be taken reacting to seeing her mum in her wedding finery is so beyond my realm of experience. So the child knows her reaction will be photographed - and so is cunning (?), astute (?), experienced enough in social media to pose for said photo presumably in a suitably shocked way? I just can’t…)

I loathe the idea that the father of the bride gets a first look, rather than the mother who has given birth to her daughter and done all the hard work over the years.

Fuck me OP, is this all you have to worry about ? By the sound of things unless you chill out and take a step back you’re going to spend the rest of your life warring with your MiL.

No, @jonthebatiste it was the adult daughter of the OP who wanted the first look photo.

Yes I’ve just found it. OP sounds much less nuts on there. MIL sounds dreadful!!! Sorry OP, your MIL sounds batshit. Not really sure why you’d want a content creator at a wedding but don’t mind me, I’m old! You carry on. Hope your MIL gets her comeuppance!!!

You sound like a nightmare!

No it wasn’t the daughter is 11!

Not an adult.

What on earth is all this utter tosh about content and first looks. How ridiculous!

Absolutely agree. OP sounds very hard work

Nobody cares about your dress. Hope this helps

Does your H realise who he married - and that he’ll be living some sort of curated fake life with content creators documenting the ‘special moments’ of your joint life.
Weddings are a family affair. You allowed total strangers in yon observe the staged/made up ‘first look’. And threw a fit when it didn’t go just so…because MIL came in.
Storm in a teaspoon —— not enough even for a teacup.

Wondering now how long anyone can stay married to this level of mental….
(separately - your poor pre-teen daughters. They have no chance…)

I think you’ve got bigger problems than your MiL. Why on earth would you go through with marrying him?

I really don’t think you’ve helped your cause by talking about first looks and content creation because it sounds utterly ridiculous unless you’re Kerry Katona and flogging your wedding photos to OK magazine. But what’s done is done. I think you’ve need to think about this sensibly. She didn’t ruin it; your DDs still got to have a photo taken of their reaction to seeing you for the first time. It wasn’t the ideal emotional moment you imagined, but I think that there are probably a few things about this relationship and marriage that aren’t the way you’d imagined it.

Personally, I like to think I’d rise above it. I’d more likely be having a chat with the photographer and asking him to find the most unflattering photo of your MiL possible. But, essentially, the less you react, the quicker she’ll find a different photo to post. The more she knows she’s upset you, the longer the photo will be up.

OK, OP, you are getting a really hard time here. Whatever people think of your approach to weddings, I think what you are describing is not that unusual these days.

So, as far as I can see - you and your daughters had planned an official photo of them seeing you in your dress for the first time, MIL wasnt invited but pushed into the room and then took a photo of your children from a private FB album and put it where it could be seen publicly?

It does sound disrespectful of your MIL. I would not blame you if your husband and you have a word with her about not sharing photos of anyone in your family without their permission. But remember the there is a lot of pressure around weddings and this can blow things out of proportion.