Hi all, I’m navigating through finding a new ‘me’, or rather, reviving the old one, after a horrible situation with my ex partner with whom I lived and was due to marry.
of course it is all subjective, but I’d be really interested to hear from your experiences as to what you have found to be the most valuable attributes, particularly those of you who have ‘gone the mile’ in relationships and deem it to have been fairly happy and functional.
I guess I am trying to figure out what is really important, because in my thirties, I feel I’ll need to make some allowances as I’d want made for me.
things to consider; attraction, kindness, reasonableness, communication, work ambitions and finances, sense of adventure, eager for self growth and learning. These feel important to me, but I am mindful I may let some that are more superficial overrule the others, which actually may be more important things for a happy future.
i have a good job and keep myself well, so mindful that I can be a little conceited in terms of what I may expect. My exes have all been the breadwinner and quite ‘flash’. I didn’t look for that, but superficial connections seem to have found me, and left me in some not very nice situations where, upon reflection, I realised I was never valued for me and rather I was more of a ‘trophy’ to add to their self proclaimed status, and I don’t want that again.
apologies if this is waffly, just really keen for some lived experiences from anyone who has taken the time to read.
Thanks all