Give him a choice
- Registry office and 2 witnesses or
- To get marriage-like protections without actually marrying, you have to recreate the legal framework piecemeal. This means using contracts, property arrangements, and legal tools to cover:
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Financial security if you split
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Rights to the home
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Parental rights & responsibilities
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Next-of-kin status in emergencies and for inheritance
1. Secure Home Ownership Rights
Joint ownership – If you buy the house together, put both names on the title and register the correct form of ownership:
Joint tenants → automatic inheritance if one dies.
Tenants in common → each owns a defined share (can be unequal); you need a will to pass your share.
Declaration of trust – A formal document that sets out who owns what share and what happens if you split
2. Define the Relationship in Law
Cohabitation agreement – A private contract between you. Covers:
How bills, mortgage, and childcare costs are split.
What happens to the home and possessions if you separate.
Any agreed spousal-style maintenance.
This needs to be drafted by a solicitor to be enforceable.
3. Parental Rights
Parental responsibility:
Mothers automatically have it.
Fathers get it if married, named on the birth certificate (after Dec 2003 in England/Wales), or via a Parental Responsibility Agreement or court order.
Without it, a father’s legal say in medical, education, and travel decisions is limited.
4. Inheritance & Next-of-Kin
Without marriage, partners don’t inherit automatically — even if you’ve lived together for decades.
You’ll need
Wills naming each other as beneficiaries and appointing guardians for children.
Possibly life insurance in trust for your partner and/or children (avoids inheritance tax if done right).
Register each other as emergency contact/next-of-kin with GP, school, and employer.
5. Pensions & Death-in-Service Benefits
Tell your pension provider you want your partner to get any lump sum or survivor’s pension.
Many schemes require a nomination form — it’s not automatic.
6. Medical Decision-Making
Consider Lasting Powers of Attorney (LPA) for:
Health & welfare – allows your partner to make medical decisions if you can’t.
Property & financial affairs – allows them to manage money if you’re incapacitated
7.Protect Against Relationship Breakdown
If you’re unmarried, there’s no legal right to maintenance for yourself (only for children).
The cohabitation agreement should cover division of assets and financial support.
For child arrangements, you’d use a Child Arrangements Order if needed.
8. Review Regularly
Revisit wills, cohabitation agreement, and nominations every few years or after major changes (new child, moving house, financial changes).