He kicked me out and took my son

[444pinkunicorns]

For the last 18 months I have lived with my partner in a property he owns. Today, following an argument he has asked me to move out immediately and has allowed me to take a small bag of my belongings.

We have an 8 week old son together, who he is refusing to allow me to take with me. Currently he is keeping our son away from me and refusing to let me see him, hold him, or take him with me following the break up.

I am our son’s primary caregiver and do pretty much all of the parenting. I have somewhere stable to move into and will be staying close to family.

Can anyone advise on what I should do or what my rights are?

She may lack confidence or be psychologically ground down.

So you are saying that in the UK, a father is allowed to prohibit a mother from seeing her newborn baby on a whim? Can you point to me where, in current legislation, this is allowed?

Possibly because she’s dealing with it all????? And hasn’t got time to answer questions from randoms on the internet.

Ring the police 999

He is controlling and coercive and has taken an 8 week old baby from his mother.

Don't leave and call the police saying he isnt letting you leave.

Call children's services in your local area. Your baby is too young to be taken away from you even by his Father unless he has significant safeguarding concerns and can evidence that your are a risk to your baby.

Or be fucking desperate and not be thinking straight.

When I worked in local government, there was always a duty social worker on call, and always a council solicitor on call in case they had to get an emergency court order or the social worker needed legal advice. Even on Christmas Day, there would be people on call.

It's alarming if that's changed.

IF the baby is breastfed then his welfare may well be at risk. Many mums have found their babies to turn up their nose at bottles, my mums group passed around all different brands of bottles with trying to get their baby to take them at various times. There’s no guarantee a breastfed baby will take a bottle if that’s not their routine. My eldest didn’t. I’d absolutely go to the police and social services if my breastfed baby was taken away from me- it is a welfare issue.

but that may well all be irrelevant and a court order is the only thing that will get your baby back so I’d be speaking to women’s aid asap as well as social services, and asking my parents to help fund a lawyer. Lots of good advice op, my heart goes out to you and I hope you see your baby soon.

I can assure you health professionals are sent out all the time to complete welfare checks, not outlandish at all… sincerely, someone who receives referrals from 111 🙃

This happened to my sister. Her son wasn't a newborn, but was still a baby. His father took him and wouldn't return him. The police said there was nothing they could do and she'd have to take him to court.

Please call the police and ask for their help. Failing that take a group of friends round and get your baby back. I know if my friend called me and said her nasty ex had kicked her out and kept her 8 week baby from from her. I’d be round like a shot. And I wouldn’t be leaving without that baby, put it that way.

Call the police and say you are worried about his behaviour and both their wellbeing’s

Do NOT leave that baby. What planet is he on, hell would freeze over before I went anywhere without my child

So you are saying that in the UK, a father is allowed to prohibit a mother from seeing her newborn baby on a whim? Can you point to me where, in current legislation, this is allowed?

Yes.

If he is on the BC, he has PR and has equal responsibility for the child. He won't be presumed to be anymore of a risk to the child than the OP would if she'd decided to leave and take the baby with her, which is something people often advise doing on here.

She will have to do exactly what posters advise women on here that the men will have to do, which is seek legal advice.

It's one of the very good reasons for not putting the father on the BC if you're not married, tbh.

My DH has been a Police Officer for 20 years, and he is now a Controller. I've just asked him what the Police would do, if you called in with this, and he said 100% they would send someone to the house asap, to speak with him. It would be a concern for baby's welfare and he would be told to hand baby over to Mum. If you haven't called already, please do call 999 now.

Call the police, OP.

Is your partner on the birth certificate? If he isn’t, he doesn’t currently have parental responsibility so the police will return your DS to you.

If he is on the birth certificate, PPs are correct that the police may not be able to force him to return your DS, you will have to go to court to get a court order. However, they will do a welfare check to make sure your DS has is okay.

Tell them that he has previously threatened to take your DS away and not allow you to have contact with your DS if you leave (you can show them your previous MN posts to corroborate this). That is coercive control and he is acting upon his threats. Given that he has made those threats and has acted on them, I would raise concerns that he might be a flight risk.

Taking a newborn away from his primary caregiver is abusive, especially if the baby is breastfed. Throwing you out on the street with no notice and only allowing you to take one bag of your belongings is abusive.

The police may have no legal power to take a baby away from his DF (if he has PR) but they can arrest him for his abuse and coercive control.

Out of hours social services will be working today.

Fucking stupid response. My exclusively breastfed baby point blank refused a bottle of my OWN expressed milk from my Mum. He would only feed from me.

Obviously we have no idea whether baby is breastfed or not but separating a newborn from their mother unexpectedly is child abuse. The threshold to remove from mother is so high that they will keep drug addicts and post partum psychosis patients together with their babies under supervision and only remove from Mum if baby at serious risk of harm.

Phone the police op.

I think Forty Elephants is not living in the real world their responses to everything are incorrect at best, downright insulting and dangerous at worst.

Making false and hyperbolic claims about the baby's safety isn't going to help anything.

Least of all the OP if/when found out the allegations are not to be true

Is he from the UK or another country? Make sure he isn't going to do a runner with the baby

Why is everyone troll hunting when literally its been about 3 hours since the post

It's allowed because in the law, either parent who has care of a child can choose who the child spends time with. The only legal remedy for this is to apply to court for a court order.

I take it from your question that you aren't legally qualified? And yet you are given incorrect advice with the implication that you have some authoritative knowledge on the subject?

Absolutely