DP positivity thread, anyone?

[LastPostISwear]

Just wanted to excess my feelings somewhere! (I already tell DH constantly.)

I just love him so much. Today he came home and just chatted so much, and I was so happy to hear all about his day and his thoughts. (If I could crawl inside his mind and live there, or occupy the same physical space as him, I would; that would be perfect intimacy for me.) He is so smart and kind and thoughtful and handsome, and is always trying to be an even better partner to me (and he succeeds!) I feel incredibly lucky to be his wife.

What are some things you love about your DP?

Were you exploring ethical non-monogamy together as a couple or did you consider yourself single and a free agent at the time you were having lots of partners?

Clarification of question ^.

The bulk of my partners were had when I was single.

But you began your relationship with your now husband when you were 18!!!

Quite telling of what? That I was horny?

Yes? I’m not sure what people are getting at.

And your relationship with a much older man wasn’t filling that gap?

so you began your relationship with your now husband at 18. But 20 you were feeling very horny and slept with TONS of men.

ok

Just pause and think

at 18 you began a relationship with your now husband
in your early twenties you slept with TONS of men despite being with your now husband in the early throes of a new relationship

don’t know about you, by my now husband and I were like rabbits in early years and there wouldn’t have been the desire let alone the time to sleep with anyone else let alone TONS of men.

Which was what, between 17 and 18? 🤔

Exactly

Op?

No. From early 17 to late 18, I slept with a tonne of men (and some women)

Then at late 18 I met DH and we started dating. Had some more partners while dating non-exclusively the first couple months. Then committed.

A few years into the relationship, we decided to explore ENM together. Some more partners there.

I have yet to go and have sex with another man on my own, even though I have DH’s permission to have ONS with them. I don’t really want or need that. I could be sexually monogamous if that’s what DH wanted/needed; ENM is just a bonus for us.

@Fingerpie

You said you had TONS of men “in my twenties”. So your DH was a bystander in all of them?

I don’t think I said “in my twenties.” I am still in my twenties

I don’t really want or need that.

well you were desperate to a couple of weeks ago!! With your colleague! 😆

I lost count somewhere in the 20s,

and your husband was a bystander throughout them all?

Not desperate. Just thinking about it a lot, though never seriously considering doing it. There was a bit of a lull at home that has since passed. Only thoughts I’ve had on this work trip was “oh no I hope Coworker doesn’t show up; it’s going to be awkward now”

I lost count when the number of partners I had was in the twenties; that was before I met DH

between 17-18 you slept with around 50 men?

So 17-18 you had slept with around 20 and then lost count

got together with DH and then slept with more than 30 men, bringing your total to around 50

so your dh has been a bystander of you have sex with more than 30 different men?!

And you only lost your virginity at 17

so lost virginity at 17
17-18 slept with more than 20 men
18 to current slept with more than 30, all with your dh watching or involved

correct?

are you sure you don’t want to post about 16 more times with the same question?

Lost v card, age early 17. Lost count of partners somewhere in the 20s; probably somewhere in 40s when I met DH at age late 18. Now probably high 50s since we became ENM (almost entirely group scenes with DH present or involved. A couple individual women on my own.)

sweet Jesus
lost your virginity at 17
and 17-18 had more than 40 sexual partners
and then another 10-15 with DH involved too.

Did you go to uni?

Yes. Uni was like a buffet for me 😂

When did you go to uni? 18 surely?

you said you slept with them all 17-18
and then got together with your dh

you forget your own story oo

But it wasn’t surely?
you’d slept with 40 odd people 17-18
thrn got together with your dh in first year of uni and remained with him thereafter

When I was around 13 or 14, I remember I really, really wanted a boyfriend. I didn’t get asked out by anyone til 17, and by that time I was going insane with libido. Slept with my first boyfriend pretty much immediately, dated him for about a month, then broke it off because he wasn’t very mature. That opened up the door for me. Before I graduated school, it was around 12, I think, as I had discovered dating apps.

Then there was the summer time, and I had moved out on my own because my parents were trying to stop my dating and sex-having with older men. And then when I got to my uni campus, men were approaching me left and right, and since I was in a bigger city, there were a greater number of attractive options on the dating apps. I had dates/ONS lined up every night that I didn’t have much work to do for my courses.

Then I met DH and we just clicked right away. He was way better in bed than anyone I had experienced, and he cared so much about me, and he is wicked smart, kind, generous, reliable, funny, athletic, handsome, a good dad… I saw that we could have the kind of life I wanted together, and so I let myself fall head over heels for him. Gave up seeing other people when he asked me to without hesitation. I didn’t require sexual monogamy from him.

He was very vanilla when we met, and I sort of perverted him… We did a lot of exploring on our own, and then we decided to go ENM and explore with other people, together. After some of that, he realized he didn’t feel as jealous as he thought he would, and said he wouldn’t mind if I had ONS with strangers that was unlikely to ever see again. Like I said, I haven’t wanted to do that.