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Original poster

advice about a man

155 replies

juliet111 · 19/05/2008 22:30

I think I can guess what you're all going to say before I write this...I have been a single parent for 4 years since my son was a baby. I have only had one relationship in that time as I hardly ever get the chance to go out as my son's father lives miles away and doesn't see him. I really miss sex (and a relationship) but sex mostly! On Saturday I went out with a friend who has a 16 year old who babysits for us sometimes and met a man who is a friend of hers.

My friend had been trying to set me up with this man for ages. Anyway, had a few drinks and went back to his...had great sex and a really nice time. I do have some reservations such as I think he's tight with money but to be honest it was just so nice to be with someone I fancied and who fancied me.

Spent Sunday with him and he said a few things about seeing me again - 'such as next time I'll make sure I shave properly...' I had to text him and he said 'I have your number now' so I said 'well call me' and he said he would. He also said he was quite shy (I can come across as not at all shy and quite demanding but am shy really) But we didn't make arrangements to meet up and I'd really like to know whether to text him - just say I had a good time or leave him ...???

OP posts:
jasper · 21/05/2008 22:24

I'm Jasper and I am a LAy-dee.
But have often been told I think like a man

MissingMyHeels · 21/05/2008 22:25

text him, text him, text him

Original poster
juliet111 · 21/05/2008 22:29

I know it is so stupid to agonise over it. It could be right about a child. He knew about my son and had met him before. At one point though (I can't remember why) I said I wanted to go to Chepstow castle and he said that we could go there. But I said I meant with my son, because that was the reason I wanted to go there and that obviously wasn't what he meant. (by the way I would never go to a place like a castle without my 4 year old because he would love it.)

OP posts:
jasper · 21/05/2008 22:30

Dior I can't ignore your point that men are completely different creatures tio women.

I just don't think that at all. I think we are mostly similar.

Dior · 21/05/2008 22:34

Message withdrawn

jasper · 21/05/2008 22:39

that's it.
I am a man.

I don't agonise over relationships and certainly not over cards

Dior · 21/05/2008 22:42

Message withdrawn

Confidentialnamechanger · 21/05/2008 22:46

I think being straightforward without boiling bunnies is the way to go. If you want a repeat performance then ask to meet up again.

Sounds like you've got your head screwed on. nothing wrong or weird with a consensual sex only relationship.

I wouldn't have a problem with texting him, where exactly is it written that only men chase. You clearly aren't trying to 'hook' a man forever so why would you need to play by "The Rules" (mad book for women trying to 'get married')

Confidentialnamechanger · 21/05/2008 22:47

oh and madamez is right as usual.

Original poster
juliet111 · 21/05/2008 22:47

Sometimes I think I think like a man. I don't agonise over cards, clothes etc. If I like something and I can afford it I buy it. I hate shopping and a lot of other 'girly' things. But I obviously agonise over men otherwise I wouldn't have written this.

OP posts:
Original poster
juliet111 · 21/05/2008 22:49

I suppose my thought is, I would find it hurtful if I texted and he didn't reply. Chances are I'll bump into him at some point and I suppose that I don't want to be rejected.

OP posts:
Dior · 21/05/2008 22:49

Message withdrawn

Original poster
juliet111 · 21/05/2008 22:51

I love mumsnet, I love the fact that you've all given me your opinions. I agree with everyone really, can see both sides...

OP posts:
jasper · 21/05/2008 22:51

I agree with Dior .Text him.

Does that make me more like a woman?

Dior · 21/05/2008 22:52

Message withdrawn

gracepaley · 21/05/2008 22:56

text him. gwan.

Dior · 21/05/2008 22:57

Message withdrawn

jasper · 21/05/2008 22:58

oh yes I love the smell of diesel

And Yorkies

jasper · 21/05/2008 22:59

give me his number and I will text him for you

Dior · 21/05/2008 22:59

Message withdrawn

jasper · 21/05/2008 23:05

fncy nother shg bg boy?

jasper · 21/05/2008 23:06

JUST KIDDING

Dior · 21/05/2008 23:06

Message withdrawn

jasper · 21/05/2008 23:08

What I really would say is

Well have you shaved yet?

I would totally be up front for at least one text!

What's the worst thing that could happen?

he does not reply? Then you know where you stand.

But I bet he just needs a bit of an encouraging shove.

Let me know when I need to buy a new hat

Dior · 21/05/2008 23:10

Message withdrawn