Has anyone ever used MDMA to fix a marriage?

[theaccidentalcandidate]

Background
Ex ravers, married 20 years together 30 years, adult kids at University. Not taken drugs for 25 years, hardly drink. One partner still in love, the other not. Get on fine, don't argue, etc, no other people involved.

I doubt it

I’ve taken MDMA a few times, years ago, but I can’t see how on earth this is a solution?

All drugs do is destroy

What’s the issues for the out of love one?

Want to save the relationship, Talk it out.

Not a long marriage but a night on MDMA with my partner 2.5 years ago put an end to our tendency in the first year of the relationship to suggest "calling it a day" when things got difficult - we have genuinely never looked back. Also aging ex ravers here

Can you explain how/why? Genuinely intrigued.

What?! 😂 Errrr, no.

I've taken mdma in the past in my mid 20s but I'm not an experienced user and I won't be taking it again either, but I can't see how this would be a viable solution.
Wouldn't the false love last only as long as the high?
It makes me think you're about 15.

I've never taken MDMA so I'm intrigued to understand how it would fix a marriage?

How would drugs magically make someone fall back love with another person? Even if they thought they did, it would only be a temporary high, the cold reality would be still be there after the comedown.

It might have saved mine. I'd try it if I were you.

You've got the come down to deal with so you won't be full of love at that point. You can't walk around in a perpetual loved up MDMA state either.

What is missing for you?

Do you still fancy your partner? Are you repulsed? Bored? What's going on?

MDMA doesn't, it's lovely. But OP of course it's not going to fix your marriage. If one person isn't in love, the best you'll get from MDMA is one confusing night of mixed signals that will cause even more hurt and regret the next day.

um not ‘fixed’ exactly but after 25 years of marriage and being both 50, it’s given us a new lease of life. Didn’t try it before. Bloody lovely and amazing stuff. Etc etc terrible social harm.

have a session every three months or so.

worth a try I reckon!

Maybe look for a psychedelic friendly therapist?

Would imagine it would massively depend on why one partner is no longer in love. It probably wouldn't fix the underlying issues that have led to that, but depending on what they were, and if both were willing to work on them, then it might help with finding feelings of love and reconnection.

Just getting high without addressing the problem unlikely to be a long term solution though, however loved up you might feel under the influence.

If you have to resort to drugs to save a relationship then the relationship isn't worth saving.

It was used in marriage guidance therapy back in the 70’s and 80’s in some states in the US. It’s how it moved into the rave culture (people taking it for therapy, started taking it for fun). It’s part of its use for PTSD.

I didn't know that, wow. I can understand why it's being suggested here. My recreational experiences from my youth certainly provided great experiences and furthered connections with people I was doing it with.

The comedown situation was for me, awful, and that was enough for me to not do it often.

Is the purpose of the drugs to get the other person to fall back in love?

MDMA makes you feel lovely and warm and loved up. If you take it with a partner it can lead to a lovely connected experience with lots of face stroking and soppy behaviour and feeling like the most in love you've ever been. However it can also make you feel a bit like that with other people too, so it's hardly reliable as a barometer of how the relationship is going!

There are also studies that show it disconnects emotion from memory, so can help when discussing upsetting issues - allows people to express and explore difficult times without the incumbent emotion. Hence why thought to be good for PTSD etc.

I can only tolerate you if ai’m off my tits is not good grounds for a marriage.
Also, you will looka right pair of dicks gurning your way around the Garden Centre on a Sunday morning.

Depends what you think it would help with.

I once had a night on MDMA with an ex I didn't really want to be with. I spent the whole night feeling really awkward and very "aware" I wasnt in the right headspace to enjoy it.

If you're taking it to try and talk it out and be really open and honest, I think it's worth a go but if you think a night mashed up might revive the old loved up feelings I don't think it will work tbh

It is not called the love drug for no reason. And it's not a "fake" love either, it genuinely fills the mind with dopamine and feelings of overwhelming love and empathy for those around you. A bit like LSD, in that the experience stays with you long after the effects wear off, as do the understandings gained.

They have experimented a lot with it in research re use in therapies and treating depression.

Obviously comes with various dangers, so I am not recommending it for all and sundry but the above is certainly my experience

I've found it useful to bring down walls with my partner and reconnect when we've been going through tricky times. Also- the mind blowing sex. However I'm not sure it could help fix a relationship if one person has totaly fallen out of love maybe counselling alongside it?
I'm aware it is used in couple's therapy now and for PTSD
Ex raver here too but still use it a few times a year.
Wishing you luck❤️