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Original poster

Found device recorder

114 replies

FredaMay12 · 26/03/2025 20:52

On Saturday night my partner went out. They knew I was planning on calling a friend for a catch up. I went to put my phone on charge and found a old mobile phone on record under the sofa recording. Why would my partner do this?? I haven't confronted them as unsure what to say and I am in disbelief they have done it. I feel like I'm being controlled. Is that valid?

OP posts:
ZekeZeke · 26/03/2025 20:57

That's super weird and creepy.
I wonder how many times they have done that in the past?
You need to sit down and speak with your partner, face to face and ask what the hell is going on.

caterpillars27 · 26/03/2025 20:59

Wtff. This is AWFUL! Leave now! I’d probably even let the police be aware.

BodenCardiganNot · 26/03/2025 21:03

There was a thread here a while back from someone trying to catch out and track a cheating partner. She was advised to put something under the sofa to record, as well as putting trackers in the car boot etc. Seems a common enough tactic (but not right either).

Burntt · 26/03/2025 21:04

That is very concerning. If this is the only issue in your relationship id be having very stern words but I suspect he may be controlling or moody or angry? Tell us about your relationship is he abusive?

Auldy · 26/03/2025 21:05

I'm so sorry this happened to you
I would leave. There is nothing that could bring me back from this abuse of trust.

MoonWoman69 · 26/03/2025 21:06

Are there any other recordings saved on the device? I was thinking you may get an idea how long he's been doing this. But then he could just listen and delete, so that's not helpful. I'd definitely have it out with him, this is not on at all.

CheekyHobson · 26/03/2025 21:06

This would be an instant deal-breaker for me. Absolute dishonesty and betrayal of trust, with controlling elements.

I wouldn’t even have a conversation about it as I would expect to hear nothing but bullshit justifications and false accusations. I would just make a plan to leave.

Easterbunnygettingsorted · 26/03/2025 21:07

Leave it on and talk about what a shite lover he is to your mate....

madaffodil · 26/03/2025 21:07

What did you do with the phone that was recording - did you leave it where it was?

LollyLand · 26/03/2025 21:08

As a safety measure I would have stopped the recording but placed the phone back and said nothing. He will assume it just stopped on its own.

When you’re away from the home make arrangements to leave but keep it secret.

InSpainTheRain · 26/03/2025 21:15

That's shocking! What did you do with the phone? DId you go ahead with your call? I'd be worried he's up to more than that because if he's done something like that it is probably not the first time (or last).

DreamerIzzy · 26/03/2025 21:20

That is awful

Ruby0707 · 26/03/2025 21:21

OP didn't say it was a he.

2025willbemytime · 26/03/2025 21:24

My neighbours husband hid a phone and camera and recorded everything. She does a job which meant this was huge problematic. I was furious when I found out as I'd shared personal things to try and support her.

He was broken two bones and abused her verbally and sexually.

Your relationship should be over. Get some help as you should know what to say.

OneKhakiFish · 26/03/2025 21:25

My next conversation on my mobile would be I'd won the lottery to a pretend friend and leave asap,

Discoprincess6 · 26/03/2025 21:25

Disgusting

Flyboyblue · 26/03/2025 21:31

Burntt · 26/03/2025 21:04

That is very concerning. If this is the only issue in your relationship id be having very stern words but I suspect he may be controlling or moody or angry? Tell us about your relationship is he abusive?

The fact he's recording her is abusive.

NoWayRose · 26/03/2025 21:35

Please contact Women’s Aid and get help to leave safely. Hugs to you x

Anotherparkingthread · 26/03/2025 21:35

Did you touch it or make it known you found it? If not you could have some real fun with this lol

SparklyGlitterballs · 26/03/2025 21:37

You can have some fun with this.

You could remove the phone and hide it. The partner will know damn well they've been found out but couldn't say anything without revealing themself.

Turn the record function off and delete any recording. They will just wonder if they set it properly and you'll know to check if it's there in future.

Record yourself saying something derogatory about your partner (ie what a lousy lover they are).

Blow a whistle loudly into it....or do a loud fart or burp.

Options are endless.

Onehundredpercent100 · 26/03/2025 21:40

You need to check your phone for malware as they are probably logging your key strokes right now. RUN

Anotherparkingthread · 26/03/2025 21:43

SparklyGlitterballs · 26/03/2025 21:37

You can have some fun with this.

You could remove the phone and hide it. The partner will know damn well they've been found out but couldn't say anything without revealing themself.

Turn the record function off and delete any recording. They will just wonder if they set it properly and you'll know to check if it's there in future.

Record yourself saying something derogatory about your partner (ie what a lousy lover they are).

Blow a whistle loudly into it....or do a loud fart or burp.

Options are endless.

Too small.

Op I'm good friends with some actors, and a couple of audio engineers. We could stage a murder.

I'm just saying.

Sassybooklover · 26/03/2025 21:43

Controlling behaviour. Is your partner normally jealous/insecure? It's very odd behaviour and would be an action a person might take if they thought their partner may be cheating. Has your partner given any indication that they think you're cheating? You need to start thinking of how long your partner may have been doing this? Also is there a possibility they've secretly recorded more intimate moments? Even in relationships there are boundaries and your partner has seriously overstepped. For me, this would be the end, because nothing that could be said, can excuse or explain this behaviour. It's a complete violation of trust and privacy.

CheekyHobson · 26/03/2025 21:48

The OP has a suspicious and controlling partner and people are advising her to “have fun” with it. Really?

BigDeepBreaths · 26/03/2025 21:58

Have you checked the device to see if there are any recorded conversations on it already? I’d be checking for pics, videos, recordings etc.

How you should respond depends on the nature of the relationship and how safe you feel raising this. If he is a partner with no ties (kids/finances…) I’d be getting out of this, fast.