Found device recorder

[FredaMay12]

On Saturday night my partner went out. They knew I was planning on calling a friend for a catch up. I went to put my phone on charge and found a old mobile phone on record under the sofa recording. Why would my partner do this?? I haven't confronted them as unsure what to say and I am in disbelief they have done it. I feel like I'm being controlled. Is that valid?

I wouldn't be having fun with it.I'd be making plans to leave.

Blimey op. I don’t think there’s any coming back from this? What the hell is he playing at! You need to end this - he’s controlling, weird, and what the hell else is he up to/watching/listening to…

Do you seriously have to ask if it’s ’valid’ to be concerned about your parter secretly recording you? Of course it’s fucking valid to be concerned about that; it’s insane behaviour from him and you should be running a mile from him.

I don't want to scare you OP but you should check for signs of recording in other places around your home, also look in your car, and if he's had access to your computer or phone there is the possibility of spyware.

I'm really sorry, but he is a piece of shit.

This is next level creepy and controlling. You need to leave him, but make sure you scan your home and devices first for any other signs of tracking.

😵‍💫
sorry op but you need to hear it

this is SO fucked up

I would be unsurprised if you also find an AirTag in your car etc etc
you need to get away from this man. He will not give you a happy life.
Run.

Please leave this man. He is creepy, controlling and potentially dangerous.

There’s only a few reasons someone might do this.

He thinks you’re cheating
He's abusive and worried he’ll tell your friend

Some men get off on invading your privacy . But You can buy recording devices that look like a pen or a button so I don’t think it’s that.

Is he abusive? It’s strange you haven’t confronted him.

I would go to this site https://uppbeat.io/sfx/category/body/fart

Fill up the recording device with fart sounds, several hours worth!

People making fun of this is shocking. Op you need to tell someone and stay safe

Controlling scum.
Don't even discuss it.
Get out.
Check for other recording devices.
It may be a police matter if you find cameras.

This is really scary and abusive, I actually can’t believe the number of comments suggesting the OP “has fun with it”. She is experiencing domestic violence and it is at risk of escalation! OP, talk to Women’s Aid (out of the house! Call them from a work landline or something) and make plans to safely leave.

Sorry OP as you don't mention the sex of your partner, are you in a same sex relationship and do they think you might have a fling going on with your friend?

This type of behaviour is controlling and abusive. It can start small and become addictive, spiralling to more intense forms of surveillance.

There was a thread on here from a few years back where the poster found files on her husband’s PC of his recordings of her. He became more and more addicted to it and used various different methods to watch what she was up to. I don’t think it even started as worrying about her cheating - he just enjoyed knowing her every move.

You can’t trust someone who does this to you. Recording and spying on someone can be very easy to hide as well with all the technology available.

Check your phone.

People saying ‘have fun’ with it and suggesting recording fart noises are unbelievably naive.

It doesn’t matter what they might suspect. It still wouldn’t justify the behaviour.

You are right it doesn't matter, recording anyone, it's reprehensible in any situation.

Leave. He doesn’t trust you, what he’s doing is abusive. This isn’t a relationship, it’s a potentially dangerous situation.

Check around your bed for anything odd.
Look on top of wardrobes for cameras.
Check your devices for key stroke monitors.

What a horrible shock @FredaMay12
This can't be mistaken for anything other than controlling behaviour. It is not accidental butt dialing. This is the first time you have noticed it. I wonder how often he has done this before that you never noticed.
Ask yourself, has he brought anything new into the house? A clock, an ornament, a smoke alarm, these are typical items for having secret spy cameras in them. On Ebay, Amazon etc etc really cheap and easy to set up.

Have you noticed an odd pissy mood from him that he refused to explain or denied? This could be that he has found something out that he didn't like, but couldn't mention because he found out by secret recordings or spyware.

Do you think this is the only recording device?

Keep it.
Have it examined and take him to court if need be.

@FredaMay12 ??

The immature part of me wants to say, simulate sex sounds, but the mature part of me says GTF away from this individual at top speed.

Forward any recordings on there to your own phone and that of someone you trust.

Yes, it’s valid to believe it’s controlling and abusive. And extremely creepy.

Is there anyone else in your household other than your partner?

Seek advice from a domestic abuse charity on how to deal with it safely.

This feels abusive to me.
I’d do as some others suggest, stop the recording, delete it. Delete it from deleted and put the phone back where you found it.
I’d then be making moves to leave.
If you confront them, they’re probably going to deny it is theirs, deny it’s recording. But none of that really matters, because the only questions you should now ask yourself is - Do you still trust them after this? And (if yes), are you sure about that?

That’s beyond weird