Why oh why is there always another woman 🙁

[Unhappyheart]

I’m so sad and desperate praying someone up will message.
Broke up with my partner about 4 months ago after what I thought was the perfect relationship. I loved him so much and try believed he loved me. All my family and friends thought we were going to b getting married and everyone commented how happy we both were.
anyway out of the blue he told me he had financial problem and needed to sort tyrm
out and didn’t want to drag me down.
I was devastated
however I kept in touch from a distance to offer support whilst trying as best as I can to get on with my life. He maintained he just wanted to struggle on his own couldn’t accept my help.
mom Christmas Day he changed his profile picture to a photo with his girlfriend and it is clearly not a new thing. Also he’s 55 she’s 30 max. He couldn’t look happier.
I know I should be glad he’s not worth it etc but I cannot control my emotions at all feel so so devastated and haven’t slept for two days.

why do they do this. I truly believed he was a good guy 🙁

Yuck! I am so sorry OP. Not his daughter is it ??

Sorry OP.

It’s not 🙁
it’s a very romantic photo and you can see the bloody Christmas card is the same one he gave me last year!
she really looks young enough to be though which has absolutely shocked me as he didn’t seem the type to go for younger at all!!
his coldness to me is so shocking like a different person not the person I know at all. I can’t understand why he didn’t just tell me as I wouldn’t been hurt but easier than this

Would have been hurt I mean but would’ve understood if that makes sense I feel like a fool

If you have broken up why are you still seeing him on Facebook and he is single so why wouldn't he be with someone else?

Sure be upset you have broken up but you have to move on sometime

Yes you are right I do just have to move on. I don’t know how I’ll do it though

Block him instantly honestly he knew you were hanging around for him and didn't make it clear to you there was no point he is icky

I think im
upset because he led me to believe he had problems was struggling blah blah. I asked if he met someone he told me no I only want you or no one it’s just I’m in a mess and need to sort my life out.
but really he was just bog standard off with someone else. And if he’d just told me I wouldn’t have been so worried about him for months which I was.

Sorry you are going through this OP

Unfortunately it takes time once something like this has happened. You get so angry you were lied to, if they had been honest it still would have hurt but you would not have held out hope for reconciliation.

What a cowardly lying twat he is OP. I'm so sorry you found out like this 🌺

I have now because yes you’re right

I know it’s hard to see because it was early days clearly and it seems he was not being his completely honest self with you. In the future you will look back on this and realise you have dodged a bullet. This is not a reflection of you, I believe it is a reflection of a man who is not really, as he presents himself. Be really kind to yourself. Treat yourself well do things you enjoy, that make you feel nice and find support from people who genuinely care about you and your real life as well as on here of course. All the best to you XX it is a horrible feeling but he has been deceitful and dishonest with you and that is all you need to know. This man is not an honest man.

Unclear from your op why you think there was an overlap. He may have met her and realised things with you weren't forever and ended it rather than cheat on you. People always say leave dont cheat. Altho sadly many do cheat! There's nothing wrong in removing him as a friend on Facebook if it's hurting you to see his profile. Also if in 30s, she's a grown woman.
I hope you heal soon and have a better 2025. Your hurt feelings may be clouding your judgement slightly

Thank you yes. I would’ve been upset but these things happen but to see that Christmas Day was so devastating

Thankyou. Yes you’re right he’s not honest and I really thought he was thanks for your reply

Yes you’re right he probably hasn’t done anything wrong really I’m just hurt and hopefully it is going to be a better year. I think even though there was no overlap I’m just hurt as we had been so close and he implied he just wanted to sort his life out

What has he done wrong?

Oh come on everyone.
He clearly wasn't honest with the OP & let her keep trying to support him through his "problems" - probably to keep her on the back burner in case it didn't work with the new younger woman.

What he did wrong was just not be honest and up front with someone who cared about him.

It's normal to feel upset, OP, but it does sound like you are better off without him.

And good luck to them both with that age gap...

Yes, I agree with Orangesinthebag
This man told the OP he didn’t want a relationship with her because of his financial issues and not wanting to drag her down. In the last four months whilst she has maintained a distance but still been there to offer support, he has not updated his story to tell her that actually there is a thirty-something girlfriend now. He does this by posting a picture of them together on Christmas Day.

I doubt they got together last week or even last month, so the decent thing would have been to tell you UnhappyHeart and then you would have been able to decide whether to cut contact and you would have started to move on. So I can see why you are upset. But I think now you can start to move on and get over the relationship because you have a full picture of the person he is and why it ended. It would have been better to have had that four months ago, of course.

Thank you for that message. Yes I just feel so sad that I was misled and a fool telling everyone how great he was wouldn’t hear a bad word about him and that he’s whacked up with someone else by the look of it and he had said he was moving in with me and wanted to get married and stuff. Which he also obviously didn’t mean. But thanks for being kind and getting it. X

Thank you for getting it and understanding. It is exactly that.

Imagine if it was. That would be embarrassing.

And annoyingly she is his perfect ideal woman and he looked so happy and I just can’t believe it and it feels so unfair

Frankly a 30 year old woman who dates a 55 year old with financial issues is completely foolish and setting herself up for some serious disappointment.

I know it is hard but try to reframe it as you no longer having to deal with a lying waste of space after you finally saw his real face. He was a loser all along.

So people said bad things about him and you wouldn't believe them?