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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Would you tell his wife

129 replies

Cottonpink · 18/12/2024 13:47

Colleague that I don't work with now. Told me his marriage was over. Confessed feelings for me..slept with me twice. Ghosted me. Wife still seems in married bliss on Facebook.

Work friend showed me messages of him chasing her. But she's also informed me that another woman is debating telling his wife about a thing with her too.

Would you message the wife or let karma deal with it.

OP posts:
intherough · 20/12/2024 07:59

YES

Icecreamlover63 · 20/12/2024 09:06

404ErrorCode · 18/12/2024 14:36

Are you doing it out of spite, or because you genuinely feel for her being cheated on?

I can’t understand how people can do this, knowing another person will get hurt. Right before Christmas too 😔

That poor woman. No sympathy for either of you, just this poor woman. Hope no kids are involved here.

I feel a conversation with the wife will be pointless. It would just cause lots of hurt. Why don’t the pair of you confront him. He is the guilty party. He is the person being unfaithful he is the one who needs to be spoken to!

Gloriia · 20/12/2024 10:41

Icecreamlover63 · 20/12/2024 09:06

I feel a conversation with the wife will be pointless. It would just cause lots of hurt. Why don’t the pair of you confront him. He is the guilty party. He is the person being unfaithful he is the one who needs to be spoken to!

He won't change even if he is spoken to.

The wife should be told so she can then decide if she wants to stay with a cheat or not. Her decision, not his.

Elasticatedtrousers · 20/12/2024 16:19

@Icecreamlover63 REALLY?!? Just give him a good talking too?

What about his wife's right to make decisions about her life based on the truth? What about his wife's right to protect herself from STIs? What about his wife's right to informed sexual consent?

How on earth does giving him a telling off give her, right to HER personal agency back?!?

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