Would you leave a lazy husband

[Pennyduke564]

Would you leave your husband if he is lazy if he doesn't help you with the house work and does not want to work and you work fall time and have kids and your husband is always starting arguments with you

I have just had an email from my soon to be ex husband telling me that he wants full custody of the 3 older children and what's nothing to do with the youngest son

That's something for the courts to deal with. Don't give him more than a tut and an eyeroll in person.

Let him take you to court.
He probably thinks he will get CM and spousal maintenance.
Twat.

Yep.

I am not going to be seeing him as I moved out on Sunday night in to my mum's and stepdads house with our youngest son because he was the only one who wanted to come with me because he could see what his dad was doing to me and how his dad was treating me

I even found out that he is on a dating site as well the day I left

@Necky1 If OP is working and he isn't, and he has care of the children for a proportion of the time (as currently sounds to be the case as only youngest with mum), he can claim CM.
I'm not saying that's right or fair btw.

Ladies just a little updated my husband has emailed me asking me for the engagement ring and wedding ring back and he has told me that I have to change my surname

Well he isn't entitled to the rings and it's your name so just ignore ignore ignore.

You can call yourself whatever you want.

Unless he specified and you agreed to return the rings, I believe you can keep them. Your solicitor can confirm

Tell him to fxxk off on both counts.

Any bullshit from him and you call 101, let them deal with him.

Tosser.

@Pennyduke564 Re the surname...absolutely your choice and yours alone but (assuming you took his surname) wouldn't you be be happy to if it means distancing yourself further from him?

Ignore his emails and do not give him your rings. They were a gift, not on loan.
Let your lawyer deal with his unreasonable demands.

No, I think you are being mean.

be strong....youve done the hardest part by leaving which has probably shocked him . if you have a solicitor, let them do all the corresponding. he can want all he likes, doesnt mean he will get ! matrimonial assets will be taken into consideration in the divorce along with care and maintenance of the children amd who they reside with....their wishes also taken into consideration.....it will be a long jaunt,but sorted eventually. he will not control you law will see to that xx

and you can keep.your surname if you wish. us ladies can revert to.our maiden name at any time by stat dec if we wish and it costs not a lot....or keep our married name upon divorce....if we choose !!

@Angran1 Absolutely! I reverted to my family name upon divorce as I (naively) took my first husband's name. Changed back free of charge, easy.
Now remarried and firmly a Ms My Name.
Never again would I change!

I’m concerned you’re not in full possession of your rights and powers @Pennyduke564.

You can force the sale of the house. He has no money and won’t take you to court.

He is a useless wastrel of a scumbag, he has nothing and does nothing. He’s a joke. Don’t allow him to bully you and frighten you into doing anything. He has literally no power.

Please try to access good legal advice.

Absolutely this. “Helping” sounds like he is a child and you a parent.

The rings won't actually be worth that much. They will have to go into the pot as an asset (ignore the advice that they're a gift and don't count) but they are never anywhere near worth what was paid for them.

To be honest, you could get them valued then give them back and get something better from the joint pot like the fridge or a washing machine!

I reverted back to my maiden name, but just because I wanted to. He has no power to make you change your name if you don't want to. I know plenty of women who have kept their married names.

With regards to the rings, if you feel the need to respond then you can tell him that the rings, along with everything else will go into the marital pot to be distributed adoring the divorce.

If you've not already done so, please get yourself a free session with a solicitor to understand what you can and can't do (plus what he can and can't do). Don't agree to anything without firstly discussing with a solicitor