Would you include a one night stand in your body count, if you wouldn't why not

[PerkyKoala]

So I recently hooked up with a friend, it ended up being a one night stand despite us having been flirting for months. We had worked together at the same job which I had left before we hooked up.
Whilst we ended on okay terms and said we were still friends, I recently found out from a mutual friend that during discussion about body counts, the guy said that he ‘doesnt include people that he’s slept with from ‘our place of work’ as they dont count’. my friend knows we hooked up so was quite shocked that he had said this as she knew this included me
Whilst a part of me thinks he said this to avoid any futher questions about who he’d gotten with from work, another part of me thinks he said because he genuinely doesn't include our hook up as having slept with me or thinks its worth including.
I personally would include it in mine, I would name any names, but he would be an additional number, and so do feel a bit hurt that he didn't appear to think the same.
just wondered what peoples thoughts are on this, is not including a one night stand in your body count normal?

How old are you?

"Body count" is a term my kids in their 20s use. I'm in my 40s and no one cares how many people their acquaintances have slept with.

What the fuck are you doing using a misogynistic term such as 'body count' for in the first place?

Body count ? What a disgusting phrase.

'Body count' is disgusting. And keeping count like it is some sort of mission.

Weird

I thought that meant how many people you've killed.

your number of sexual partners increases your disease risk. Every partner counts.

back in my day we were taught that you are sleeping with every person that person has ever slept with.

I’m 29, most of my friends are in their mid to late 20’s

Teen jobs can be boring, but honestly this sounds like you’re not even old enough to be employed!

Just stop talking about your sex life and get back to work, the queue at the drive thru must be out of control!!

Body count sounds like you’re a hitman.

I mean…why count how many people you’ve slept with? To track possible STIs, to brag? I guess anyone can make up their own rules.

Why would anyone care how many people someone has slept with? Obviously, take care over sexual health, and if you're going to have sex without using a condom, you'd ask questions about their past, maybe ask them to take a sexual health check, but judging people for their sexual past? This is 2024, not 1924.

I know how many people I've slept with,one night stands and relationships. They all count.

You could get pregnant or catch an STI just as easily from a ONS as a relationship, if you don't use any protection. They count.

What doesn't count is anyone else's opinion of who you've been with.

I wouldn't use the term body count. But yes, if for some reason I needed to count the people I'd slept with, I'd think it was fairly obvious that that includes all people I've slept with. And doesn't exclude some of them for no real reason.

I think one night stands would count if you are in to quoting this number. That’s the point of it really isn’t it - if you had 100 one night stands and two relationships it would make more sense if you said your body count was 102 than 2. Better not to know anyone else’s number though and it wouldn’t be something to be offended about if he is keeping your night more private imo.

I have never felt the need to tell anyone how many people I've slept with. Why does anyone want or need to know? Why do you even want or need to know?

Is there a certain number that's good and a certain number that's bad?

If you were in a relationship and they judged you based on your number, would you want to continue to be in a relationship with them?

Sleep with as many people as YOU are comfortable with, make the decision based on your safety and your desires.

'body count' if that's what you call it, means no of people you've had sex with, not had meaningful relationships. You don't have to keep a count or discuss it but yes it does include one nighters.

Back to the OP, it sounds like you're upset that this person isn't "counting" your encounter. That could be upsetting. But tells you a lot about the person he is. You had a flirtation, which on your side may have led to the expectation of more than a ONS. He decided otherwise. His loss. Chalk it up to experience, hold your head high and move on.

“Body count” - yuck, misogynistic crap. By all means work out how many people you’ve slept with if that’s important to you. But don’t bother with anyone who asks - none of their business!

Body count is how many people you've killed. You say it that way to depersonalise the human.

You need to grow up .

Still depersonalises the human though

I'm mid 40s and I remember hearing term body count in my early 20s (conversation passing the time in a v boring job).

Yes a ONS counts. A shag is a shag.

Using the term "body count" isn't normal. Please don't use it. It's misogynistic crap that fools women to believe that sleeping with mutiple men is fine, almost admirable. Spoiler alert - women are never the winners in this game. You're flying the flag for the patriarchy.

What they all said^^^

Body Count is 100% none of any else’s business. Of all the (5, see what I did there!) men I have been with I knew the count of precisely one. Each others first!

And similarly I have never been asked about it. It’s really grim, and you can console yourself that you have dodged a bullet.