Anyone else trying not not to contact a guy part 2??

[YouAreAllMySymmetry]

Hey loves @namechangeforthis5 @Frith2013 and whoever else I can think of.

How we all doing?

I'm having a weird night; I've been drinking and guess what skill it reminded me I've developed: crying out of one eye. It means that people generally don't notice, in the car, or lying on the couch or in bed.

That's sad, isn't it.

Yes she is using you

Very true @LadofNorth

If anyone remembers me from a few weeks back, things rumbled on, just the same. Some very kind behaviour from him but some rather questionable behaviour, especially in the last fortnight.

Totally ignored for a few days again . Saw him at a shared hobby - ignored.

Texted him to say I'm very unhappy and want it to end. Not the first time I've texted this.

And guess what? No reply.

He's nothing but a messer and a waste of time.

You're worth more than the crumbs he gives you.

I can't explain it. Even the seemingly good things had a negative element.

Earlier this week we had a good evening and I stayed overnight. I never thought that would ever happen. And yet, (TMI) I only had 2 condoms in my bag, the last of a box. We discussed it. In the morning, he tried to have sex without one as there were none left (not in a rough way) saying "one time won't matter". I then had to pop out for half an hour for a work thing and when I got back, he asked if I'd bought more condoms! I'd literally driven from his house to an industrial unit in the middle of nowhere and back again.

Something else a bit icky happened before which involved somebody else. I don't want to out him or me so let's say he had to run in and ask someone for a condom - something really obvious even though I'm a secret. That sort of thing. I'm still mortified as I told him 3 times not to do this particular thing.

I'm actually much more easy going and patient than you'd think from this thread! I can't handle the blowing hot and cold behaviour and the bloody being ignored.

And the sex was always shit.

What are you getting out of it? Is it attention that feeling of being wanted but he doesn't even do that.

And if the sex is shit aswell as the rest of the problems then what's the point? He's not serving you're needs in any respect.

@Kat888 the problem is that I have literally no one else. His house is the only house I have been in this year (apart from my own!)

Sorry to take over the thread but I want to remind myself that it has ALWAYS been bad...

And

Well, it is definitely 50% my fault though!

I realised it's closely related to hormones; spent the day feeling sad about it, got my period and every month I go 'ah yeah, right enough' 😆

Also have NC'd again @namechangeforthis5

I do it all the time in case any of this absolute horror show is recognisable.

I guessed that 😆@FourToTheMFingFloor
@Frith2013 i get he’s all you got but he’s really awful. You deserve better

@Frith2013 I agree - you sound like a lovely person but this has left you absolutely lost. He's utterly awful for you.

@Frith2013 He really is a POS. He does that on purpose the not replying the ignoring you so you are constantly on edge.

I also think it's strange the way he came after you when you had just broken up with you're ex. I'm sure you were feeling vulnerable and he took advantage of this.

I get it. Being lonely and just wanting to feel something but he does not deserve you one bit. For me I would rather be lonely than deal with this headfuck. You're worth so much more than this always remember that 💕

@Frith2013 what they both said. He does not deserve you. It will be hard but please get away from him xx

Well, no phone call tonight which is good 😄

Well I expected a message today after he tried calling me but nothing which makes me have mixed feelings

Gah. I was just in a meeting and heard so many things come out of my mouth that he would say, and that I would say to him, and I hate that it just won't leave me.

Like what @FourToTheMFingFloor ?

Just...we worked in the same field so a lot of what I know now comes from that time.

Ah ok I see what you mean sorry. Yeah it just makes it harder

So we did meet up, she came round, talked the same things like she needs to see how it is with him... then had breakup sex, blew both our minds, lots of tears, she left. We had agreed previously to watch the Euro final at the pub as friends so we did. Her kids were there for most of it, they left, we talked, she was back to being confused again - she had sent a text saying she would be late for the pub as needed to shower, had not done so already as wanted to keep my smell on her as long as possible.

Anyway, walked her home, and then I said for both our sakes I will not contact her till end of week and see where things are then. We have never gone 36 hours in the last year without messaging but both sticking to it so far. She needs some time and I need to stop checking to see if she has messaged.

One day at a time. For anyone else trying not to, I am writing down my messages I would send her on a Word doc, so I can write them, just not send which sort of helps. From stuff like I am missing you to asking about her daughter's work experience. Sounds rubbish but seems to work.

Ooo, she's an absolute messer, @FloydPink .

Obviously, no reply for me!

Have been round the charity shops today and built a wardrobe so all good.

@FloydPink what a head fuck!
@Frith2013 glad you're doing well

Complete headfuck for you.

I do the same with writing stuff down... like a diary almost. I find it really helps to get my head straight as an outlet for my feelings