Partner is questioning our relationship because of celebrity free pass

[Rockiepride]

Last night, my partner and I were sharing a bottle of wine and watching TV.

Megan Fox appeared and he mentioned how beautiful she was, I agreed and jokes that he absolutely has a free pass for her.

He immediately asked who my free pass would be and I again joked Brad Pitt.

He then started questioning if I was being serious and how I can’t love him if I’m happy that he would sleep with her or I would with Brad Pitt (insane I know!) I stuck to my comments and said yes absolutely, thinking this was all a bit of a laugh.

This morning he has said that he doesn’t think I can be serious about him or the relationship if my view is that it’s ok to sleep with a celebrity. He said that he would never want to sleep with anyone over me, that it hurts him to think I can’t say the same, and that he needs to question whether or not we have the same morals as he’s so upset I would say such a thing.

Am I the one who is in the wrong here? I thought a celebrity free pass was a bit of a common thing (and totally unrealistic, so therefore a bit of a joke). I’ve been surprised as his reaction to this.

He sounds like a barrel of laughs.

Some people just don’t find this sort of thing funny. It’s ok that you do and ok that he doesn’t. My DH doesn’t like thinking about that sort of stuff either. And while I wouldn’t get hung up on whatever celebs he put on a list for a ‘pass’, I also wouldn’t be love to be watching TV and for him to announce how beautiful another woman is. Just avoid in the future.

Op does he understand that you meant it as a joke, and in no way is he free to sleep with meghan fox, should she come calling 😕 I think you may need to spell this out to him. Maybe throw in some shade her way too just to be sure you're clear but whilst you're at it... please check why he noticed she was beautiful in the first place... let's see how long the convo lasts then 🤣

It's still talking about cheating though. Weird things do happen

I’m never going to shag Keanu (yeah, I only he’s nearly 60, but come on…) or Ryan Gosling… it’s a bit of fun. I am deeply put off by insecurity, which your pathetic boyfriend has in spades.

This is a famously lighthearted thing, depicted in popular culture. See: Ross’ laminated list on Friends.

Saying these things re a free pass is silly. Don't get me wrong I have a great sense of humour but I always think this free pass or list thing is weird

Yes. I agree with this. I wouldn’t like it either

Hilarious. Meanwhile in another thread the OP is being urged to ditch her not-yet BF because he ‘liked’ a picture of an attractive woman.
You couldn’t make it up.

What if he’d said “Claire from accounts”?

Me and my fella joke about this stuff all the time. We don’t just have a free pass, we have a list! 😂

BUT, we’re realistic and know it’s never gonna happen, so it never bothers either of us. It’s just a bit of fun!

I think your only option here is just to lie when you sleep with Brad. Not ideal but needs must.

But.....he gets it's completely hypothetical, no? How on earth can he take it that seriously? My free pass is Raza Jaffrey, that man is FINE. But if I ever met him IRL I would giggle and blush and probably accidentally dribble wine over him so it's better if I love him from afar.

It's a joke. A fairly well known one at that. But if it makes him that uncomfortable and he's that sensitive about it while you're relaxed, then perhaps this is not hte relationship for ither of you.

[for the record - Daniel Craig for me, Selma Hayek for DH....]

My CFP is Momoa. His is Helena Bonham Carter.

Anyway ... Has he ever been weird about other things, like you seeing a male gynaecologist etc etc?

It’s more likely that Megan Fox would sleep with Brad Pitt tbh.

Insecurity over stuff that’s never going to happen is a waste of time.

ONE thing I learnt about men is not to make any of these jokes with them whilst they are only BF/partner. In fact, even if you fancied BP, advice is less said the better.

It just never go well. Someone had to call the pol!ce over a valentine's joke gone wrong between a couple (fb and gf), at home, over a glass of wine.

My Dh finds it even sensitive if you mention anything age related- I have learnt not to mention age around him unless he mentions it.

Hahahaha what a bell end! He wanted to make you jealous by saying how beautiful Megan Fox is and it completely back fired so he's doubled down and gotten angry. He can give it but he can't take it. You've done nothing wrong op.

This!!! It’s completely normal to find other people attractive and think about sleeping with them even when you’re in a relationship. That doesn’t mean you don’t love your partner, it’s just human nature. People who demand their partner thinks they’re the “best and hottest” person in the world are just deluding themselves. Fair enough if some people don’t want to talk about it in detail but the free pass thing is clearly a joke

My response would be, "be bitter or be better"

He sounds like a twat and I’d be telling him to grow up and get over it.

🤣 exactly this.

Son Heung-min is my phone wallpaper and on phone case, doesn't bother my husband one bit!!

Does he often pick fights or make out you're a terrible person for little to no reason?

I could understand someone getting the hump cos they were a bit drunk, but doubling down on it the next day and making it a huge issue between you, is just weird and stinks of trying to wrongfoot you.

YABU to have Brad Pitt as your free pass

'But it's laminated!'