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Original poster

Is it pathetic to unfriend family on social media because they make you feel triggered.

127 replies

Orangeblueberry · 12/04/2024 19:41

I’ve got a family member who has done nothing wrong to me but having to look constantly at their perfect family photos is making me feel shit. I have de-friended them now but is that me being pathetic?

I’m trying to protect my mental health. I had a shitty childhood and a long abusive marriage (which I left a few years ago) and having to constantly look at their perfect life is really effecting me. My life has been hard and hard lessons have been learned. This other person (she is female) has never worked, her husband pays for everything, she is absolutely happy with this. She gets to stay at home all day whilst the kids are at school and crochet and bake cakes and I’m getting triggered seeing this on a daily basis. Like I said she hasn’t done anything to me personally I just can’t keep looking at it and thinking what crap luck I had, why me.

OP posts:
Original poster
Orangeblueberry · 17/04/2024 21:26

It is interesting what the other poster said about having painful and distorted view of myself. I’m wondering what this means. Have I soaked in all the horrible things people have said to me over the years?

OP posts:
purpleshortcake2021 · 14/07/2024 18:22

Orangeblueberry · 13/04/2024 08:49

It’s not a friend it’s a family member. I am happy in my relationship with my partner and my children. I’ve an awful lot of trauma in my past and for some reason this family member triggers me.
I’ve had to grow up alone and go through all of my trauma alone. There is no one who has told me they are proud of me from my family or from my in laws. For some reason this particular person gets tonnes of praise. I get sick of reading it on Facebook. When I think of the abuse I’ve suffered and no one has ever supported me it makes me sad. The family member has not suffered abuse of any kind (we all know this). She is just the most perfect person. Of course I’m jealous. I’d love to go through life and it be easy. When I see her posts I see my past, I can’t help it. She hasn’t done anything wrong.

Oh I get the praise thing been so frustrating. We have a family member (SIL) who has never worked, spends her days getting nails and makeup done, her daily posts are selfies pouting like a teenager wearing revealing clothes. Her husband and secondary school aged kids rarely get a mention. When I post it’s mainly of family days out, occasionally the odd selfie. Invariably my FIL likes every one of her posts saying how lovely she looks and sending encouraging words. My family posts barely get acknowledged. Drives me crazy as I work really hard in two jobs to support my husband in providing for our family and make an effort to do interesting things with the kids. Yet feel I’m the unacknowledged “poor relation” as I’m not glamorous. Really hard not to feel bitter 🥲

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