I've been seeing a guy a few months now.
He really is confusing me!
When I see him all seems very good. He is reliable, never cancelled or let me down, we laugh and talk lots.
The last time I saw him however I was going to end it as I felt inbetween seeing him I hear .... nothing! Absolutely nothing. It can be a whole week and nothing no msgs or calls. The longest it has gone is 10 days!
Unless I initiate and his replies are very blunt & yes and no answers.
After getting advice from others I was advised hes not all that into me so I was going to end it.
I arrived at his place and he asked me if I'd like to go to a friends birthday party the following week , I was stunned as he had seemed so uninterested in me all week.
We went and he was introducing me as his girlfriend all evening to his friends & family. I though ah maybe now weve established what we are... in a relationship he will feel more open to more communication inbetween dates.
He stayed mine that evening, had breakfast out the next day... his idea. Great weekend really.
He went home. Since then ... over a week ago....nothing! No msgs , no calls ... nothing. I was waiting to see it he would initiate this time... nope not happened.
It's making me feel so confused, introducing me as a girlfriend yet not acting like a boyfriend.
So on top of this his family and friends have now added me on social media! .... my friend seems to think they wouldnt be doing this unless he has expressed he is serious about me ... so what the hell is going on?
Still not heard from him now been a week and I feel he is sending very mixed signals.
What would you do in this situation? Advice please
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Relationships
Wierd dating / relationship situation here
Violetroseyjane · 11/04/2024 20:42
WickWood · 11/04/2024 20:54
I was dating someone like this for 4/5 months, great times when we were together, none stop talking and laughing, then in-between dates he rarely contacted me. He would sometimes initiate a message but it was after days of nothing. Seemed really keen when he was with me. I'm sorry to say the communication didn't improve in my instance. I would be honest and say you don't like/understand the lack of communication between dates, say you would like more initiation and communication, and see what he does, that'll tell you all you need to know!
BirthdayRainbow · 11/04/2024 21:08
What I would do is I would ask him!
BirthdayRainbow · 11/04/2024 21:15
X, you introduced me as your girlfriend and your family have all added me on SM which makes me think we are solid. However, we have no contact for a week at a time and that to me is not a relationship. I would like to talk to you daily, at least texting if not always a call, though daily phone calls with your boy/girlfriend is normal. If that is not something you would want to do then maybe we need to think whether we are right for each other.
LeaveTheClocksAlone · 11/04/2024 21:27
Massive introvert here (if that's what he is). Totally understandable that you want a more normal level of contact but if someone said to me "I would like to speak to you daily" I would run a mile. Fast 🏃♀️
LeaveTheClocksAlone · 11/04/2024 21:27
Massive introvert here (if that's what he is). Totally understandable that you want a more normal level of contact but if someone said to me "I would like to speak to you daily" I would run a mile. Fast 🏃♀️
ShrubRose · 11/04/2024 21:45
It's making me feel so confused, introducing me as a girlfriend yet not acting like a boyfriend.
I think it's possible that he is acting like the boyfriend that he can be.
You have to decide if you are happy with that.
There's a great saying, "It never works to ask for what's not on the menu."
BettyBardMacDonald · 11/04/2024 21:45
You barely know him; I wouldn't want to be enmeshed with anyone at such a very early stage. What's wrong with weekly dating as you get to know one another?
Do you have a full life of work and activities of your own? It's always a mistake to rely too much on one person.
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smellslikecinnamon · 11/04/2024 21:53
Ok I'm going to throw it out here even if I get slated but could he be ASD?
It's very autistic to do this. Autistic people don't tend to initiate texts or calls. Google something like 'autistic boyfriend never contacts me. See if resonates.
He may just need direct explicit info on what you require .
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