Am I being unreasonable

[Mooseylooseyloo]

I don't even know where to start.

Me Female 42 and my partner Male 41 years.
I've been with my partner for 3 years ( known him 15 yrs) , the last 12 months has been tense as he's depressed about his job/working situation and Is desperately trying to change careers to become a property investor. He's done numerous courses and has one propery on the go which is making a little money. In my eyes he is still very novice at this (6 months) mistakes have been made, but I know its all part of learning. To add, he has no money of his own, only his wages, he has no savings and is trying to do property through investors money.
Cutting to the issue.
A few weeks ago he was looking at a property that needed an investors money, the 2 that he knows wasn't Interested, so he came to me and said he had a thought, that I could be the investor as I have equity in my house ( I owned my own house for almost 20 years and i have 150k plus equity) I said I would think about it.
I did, and I don't feel comfortable taking money out (at the time he wanted 70k) I told him I didn't feel comfortable taking money out, it's a house we live in and my kids home and I would not want to risk it in any way. Since then (several weeks now) he has been quite cruel to me, Silent treatment, talking to me like crap, he says I'm a f idiot as I could be earning interest on the money and how he would be giving me back more etc, how my money is worthless being stuck in a house blah blah. Yesterday he said he was sorry for the way he's been and is just stressed as he so desperately wants to get into property and it was stressing him. Well todsy he has read a chapter in a book about equity and has started again, calling me names and saying how I wanted to be partners etc and yet I won't take the money out (30k he wants now) and now I'm getting silent treatment again stomping around, slamming doors etc, he told me he's not interested in my empty words of support and encouragement. This is because I won't take equity out of my family home.

Please I need another person's perspective on this, am I being unreasonable? , should I risk it to help him? He has never done it before and I just don't want to be the guinea pig. If I had the money just sat in a bank account then fine, but I'm nervous at taking it out of my house and him not being able to pay it for some reason and me becoming liable.

Thanks for reading.

You’re asking whether to risk your house for this abusive arsehole? Don’t even think about it. Kick him out for treating you like that. Please. Nobody deserves that sort of treatment from someone who’s not getting his own way. Why are you putting up with his cruelty. Read back your post and imagine it was someone else. What would you say to her. Anything could go wrong but I wouldn’t be doing him any favours. Show him the door, what example is his behaviour setting your kids. You deserve better.

He sounds like a total moron. There's so much wrong with this I can't even list it out.

It's your house and your equity. Be careful. Next he'll be telling you to get the loan for the property in your name and let him manage it for you.

I would dumb my DH if he treated and spoke to me like that. Don't give him the money!

There’s a reason the other two investors don’t want to know, now is such a volatile time to get into the property market. He sounds like he is trying to bully you into agreeing, imagine if this was a partner to one of your children down the line, you would tell them to run a mile and get rid of him because he’s being abusive.

Please don’t jeopardise your home for someone like this.

Read your OP again.
Imagine your daughter/sister wrote that post.
What advice would you give her?

Nope, don’t risk it and don’t let him guilt trip you into it.

He is an abusive shit who wants to get his hands on your money. Don't give in, whatever you do!

Please get out of this awful relationship as soon as possible.

And let me guess? He is cocklodging in your home?

Noooooooooo!

Just no. Red flags everywhere!

Seriously- get out of this abusive relationship as quickly as you can!

He's abusing you. And being quite obvious about it.

Never, ever risk your house for anything. Ever.

Dont just say no to financial help, say no to the whole relationship. Get rid of this nasty, horrible man.

Absolutely no to giving him equity from your house.
And since he’s showing an abusive side, dump him asap !
Don’t marry him whatever you do !

He doesn’t have his own money so he’s trying to bully you into giving him yours. That’s attractive. I never say this, but LTB.

You are not being unreasonable at all OP. Please don't risk your home by giving him any money!

OP he is asking you to risk your, and your families security for his gain. You have little to gain, but a LOT to lose. This is not something that you need to do, in fact it’s exactly as your instinct is telling you, a bad idea. Please do not be bullied into doing this. It’s madness.

I genuinely have never called a person I loved a fucking idiot .
And the rest of his treatment of you is extremely abusive.
Do not give him any money.
He is not a good man.

Don’t even consider being bullied by this grabbing prick into risking your children’s home. If he wants to invest money, he should grow the hell up and earn it, not try and swindle you out of yours. Kick him out and find someone who isn’t an abusive freeloading sponge.

Even if he was not being an arse, I still would not risk it. Why aren't tgebotger investors interested ?

Give me money or I will swear at you, call you names and withdraw from our relationship? Charming.
absolutely don’t give this man a penny, or a second more of your time.

Do you honestly think you'd see him for dust once he'd screwed you and your children over and made you homeless? His words show you precisely what he thinks. This is not a partnership.

He'd be on to his next victim, I mean 'investor'. Probably already scanning for them.

I not sure I understand this correctly. Does he want to play investors with your equity of the house? You told him no, because it is yours and you are not gambling the little bit you have achieved and because of that he is sulking and making a fuss etc.

If I understood correctly please dich him.

Absolutely not! Do not under any circumstances give him the money from yours & your children's home.

He’s trying to manipulate you into giving him the money by abusing you. Absolutely do not give him the money.

If you cave now he knows that this behaviour works eventually. It will happen again.

Tell him no and to knock off the abusive dramatics or he can leave

I invest in property and I would not mortgage my house to invest in another currently. Interest rates are relatively high and more than ROÍ in many places.
He's a jerk and he can risk other people money not yours.
But take the money thing out if it. Would you really want to be with a man that treats you this way?