Husband's reaction to sexting by Geri Halliwell's husband

[Turkathon]

My husband and I were talking about Geri Halliwell's husband, who has been caught 'sexting' his female colleague.

I don't think there are sexual images in the WhatsApp messages. They are flirty texts with a sexual element. For example, he asks women what kind of underwear they're wearing.

My husband said that it shouldn't be a massive deal for a women if her husband does this (though he said 'it isn't great'). He said that women who get really riled and angry about this sort of thing are letting their thinking be clouded by 'gender politics'.

I thought he was joking but he wasn't.

Would many people take my husband's attitude?

He is actually very bright and has a job as a Director in a large company (I won't name it).

But I agree his use of the term 'gender politics' didn't actually make much sense.

He also called people's shock at these things 'woke'.

No bright preson uses the term "woke".

Identify your husband’s conventionally handsomest friend and ask your husband for his phone number.

Seriously, this behaviour would be ok for some couples but very few, I would think. And no one would agree to the secrecy, because open marriages are based on transparency I believe. So, sneaky sexting would/should be a problem for everyone I think.

What are your own thoughts about your bloke, then, OP? No one cares about his worthless thoughts.

DH would be in hot water if he was caught doing what Christian has. Would it be marriage ending likely not, but I would be saying we need to work on the relationship if I caught him going it!! I would also have joined him in Bahrain as a united front.

If he was a single male I don't think the texts are anything but two people flirting with each other! They were very tame for all the drama that has been made of it.

OP what was his answer when you informed him you would do similar with a male colleague next week, as he's given you the green light?

And actually this sleazy pickle this man has found himself in is more than just flirting. It's a powerful man abusing his position. Tale as old as time

He is actually very bright and has a job as a Director in a large company (I won't name it).

///

Mmm

Maybe he has done similar to a female subordinate in the past?

Oh and in your OP you refer to her as a colleague? She isn't . She works for him so not a colleague. Colleagues are generally the same level.

Ask him how he would feel if you did some light hearted flirting with men by phone. Or catch him unawares. Over breakfast say "I just texted Brian to tell him his bum looks yummy in his new gym shorts". His immediate reaction will tell you if he holds identical values for both of you or if he's a hypocrite.

What an arse. Basically 'Men in long-term relationships want to flirt with other women. It's fun for us and we don't care if you don't like it. If you don't let us, you are an angry feminist hag'. Presumably he would be totally fine with you sexting other men about what underwear they are wearing?

He might be many things, but devout Catholic isn’t one of them.

Absolutely!!

He sounds like an arse sorry OP.

CHs texts were not light hearted flirting.

he’d clearly engaged in sexual activity with the recipient at some point.

"For context, he is a devout Catholic and he says he wouldn't cheat."
But he's saying he doesn't see sexting as cheating and that's the problem. I'd be asking myself, and him, what else he doesn't see as cheating. His boundaries are clearly more blurred than yours, or most women's for that matter. I'd be rather concerned.

He said that women who get really riled and angry about this sort of thing are letting their thinking be clouded by 'gender politics'.

Aren't we lucky that we have men like your husband to tell us how and what to think. If it wasn't for bright men like him us little ladies would waste our time getting riled at faithless partners when we could be more usefully thinking about sweet little kittens and perfecting our ironing techniques.

You've got yourself a right nob there.

Errm, obviously not. Would he see asking a guest at a dinner party that sort of question as appropriate? That's madness.

So would he be happy if you did it?

Does he think it is okay for someone in power in the workplace (like him) to keep on sending texts to a female employee when they are no longer interested in him?

I'll bet my house your husband has sexted other women. There's a reason he's basically defending men doing this. I hope you have your blinders off.

For context, he is a devout Catholic and he says he wouldn't cheat.

Of course he says that. He's clearly devout. 🙄

and he says he wouldn't cheat.

Yeah mine said that as well....3 months before he left to live with OW.

Looks like Andrew Tate has joined the conversation.
I'm off to do the washing internally.

And the message the previous two replied to has quite rightly been deleted as self-aggrandising nonsense.

There's probably other things he's been awful about, can this just come out of the blue? It's awful though, sorry OP.

This is the trouble. No one ever fully discusses EXACTLY what they consider cheating.
Some people don’t consider flirting as cheating, some do. Same with porn or strip clubs. Some people would say an emotional affair isn’t cheating because it’s not physical, some say kissing isn’t cheating etc etc etc.
We all just assume our lines are the same as everyone else’s and it sounds like you’ve found a difference in yours and your husband’s understanding of what constitutes cheating.
I would personally be very worried now if I was in your position because he says he would never (or hasn’t) cheated, but maybe he already has or will do but doesn’t even think it’s cheating.
I wouldn’t ignore this and I’d have a proper sit down and really discuss exactly what the lines of adultery are for you as a couple. Modern life blurs a lot of lines with things like Only Fans and live sex cams etc. which is really helpful, because life just isn’t hard enough…

He said that women who get really riled and angry about this sort of thing are letting their thinking be clouded by 'gender politics'.

He's letting his thinking be clouded by his own morals, his opinion on women, or else he's one of those who tries to be superior acting like people only think what they think because they're conditioned to and it's him who can see things clearly.

It's clearly got fuck all to do with gender politics, seeing as men are equally as likely as women to be furious and upset if their female partner sexted another man.

He may be a director in a large company but he clearly isn't that bright for at least 3 reasons, 1- he thinks this way, 2 - his use of gender politics demonstrates a lack of understanding, 3- he had this conversation with his wife.