Stories of stingiest first dates

[frtedsbed]

Just comparing experiences here at a friends ... jaw dropping stuff!

Mine asked me to transfer money for a coffee and cake after our first date which was a walk and feeding the ducks.
I thought we were going for lunch ... that was the original invite.
Another asked me to transfer money to r a takeaway having offered to pay for my child and I , as he stayed at mine every weekend. Both ended there and then !

I can’t believe this sort of attitude, it’s like someone saying they are so important you have to pay for their time, so unbelievably grabby and full of themselves

First date was to a dessert shop, as we were leaving to pay he said he had a gift card to pay for his.
We got to the till and gift card wouldn’t work, don’t know if it was expired or what but after a few mins the waitress called another staff member over to try, still didn’t work.
Guy I was on the date with made a loud joke about how we’d have to go out the back and do the washing up 😂by this point I just wanted to get out of there so I paid for both of us on my card.
Second date he invited me over to his place and as I was on my way he text me “I’ve only got ipa beers in which you won’t like so if you want something to drink you’d better stop at the shop”

Another angry man. Honestly a quick search of these guys’ other posts is illuminating.

incredulous - not angry , if that’s how some behave fair play to them - I’ve shown this thread to my daughter and she was just as taken back ad some of the comments, maybe I should get her posting instead

Do you have children ? This really the game changer

Why was there a second date ?

Not All Men Are Like That

You’re literally invading women’s spaces and calling them grabby and full of themselves for having their own standards when dating. Don’t you think that’s a little strange?

I am imagining that you want your date to be the right sex and reasonably physically attractive. That is normal, if you want more you might struggle, but you are perfectly entitled.
If someone finds wealth combined with generosity attractive, they are entitled to that. We have deep and shallow wants in a partner and it is a shame that women are shamed for having shallower wants that we accept men have.

It a parenting site “by parents for parents “ - as a parent I don’t think it’s strange at all , or do fathers not qualify as parents any more?

I certainly don’t want my daughter having such low standards that she expects her dates to pay for everything, she has been brought up a fully independent human being

Don’t start with the ‘parenting’ crap. You’re over 50. You don’t have young kids. The majority of your posts are on sex topics. I’ve had a quick review of your posts on here and funnily enough you seem to oppose female posters 90% of the time.

I’d think it was completely bizarre if my dad was posting crap like this on a women’s forum.

Wasn’t for me. And 80 percent of women work. It’s not the 50s.

I’m 46 and this man was 49… it was a £6 glad of wine for goodness sake..

Less than 50% of women with pre-school work ft. Women's pension pots are generally a third the size of mens.

Just remembered another. This was a friend of a friend, so we vaguely knew each other. We went to the pub and each bought a round, all good, but then (this was when you could still smoke in pubs) he asked me for a cigarette, saying 'I didn't buy any cigarettes because I knew you'd have some!'

I gave him one of course, but, what? I could barely afford my own smoking habit, I had no plans to take on his as well. If he'd said he'd forgotten his own, that would have been reasonable, but the casual assumption I would act as his cigarette supplier was really off-putting.

Hahaha!

Mine accidentally knocked my prosecco over (I'd bought the drinks- his was a beer). He was sorry but didn't jump to replace it. After 5 mins or so he grudgingly asked if I wanted him to get me another one (after saying I could share his beer if I wanted- no thanks). I said he didn't have to... So he didn't! No more drinks were bought that day! It was the final straw.

This was quite a few dates in- I'd already noticed he was tight (which is my #1 turn off!) but kept thinking I'll see how it goes, give him time to redeem himself.

in fact I bought him lunch on our very first date - he'd driven quite far to meet me (I'd driven a fair bit too mind) and I insisted for that reason (not that I ate anything as we were only meeting for a coffee but he'd ordered food!). He was happy to accept. Which is fine, but I found it a slight turn off.

Every time we went for a coffee I'd automatically offer to pay as it's in my nature (i know it's hypocritical as I do prefer a man to insist on paying - not all the time- but I can't just stand there and wait expectantly) but as it turned out, he gladly accepted every time!

It's annoying as there was quite a lot I liked about him but i couldn't get past the tightness.

There was more..

Pissing myself at the 50-something dude coming on to Mumsnet to stick it to the woman over buying a drink because he thinks that's the danger facing his 15 year old daughter. Even better than the guy who tried to have us believe that his rage at the thought of shouting a woman a Coke was borne of his great, noble sense of equality, which must surely equate to an equal desire to do 50% of all domestic shitwork.

These plonkers are really ruining a good thread.

I went on a date with a guy to the pub, I think he might have bought me a drink so not too bad. But the girl serving short changed him 5c (so about 3p!) she said that she didn't have 5c coins until the manager was back to open the safe. He made a big song and dance about it. I was mortified, she was getting really red. I didn't see him again

Absolutely.

Disaster ''date'' number one: I was 16 and invited out by the school playboy, he was all ''Donny Osmond'' teeth and ''Crocodile Dundee'' looks. I didn't like him at all but he was my 1st date ever so I agreed.

We went to a sit-in, some pizza place or other. He knew I was a vegetarian but insisted on ordering my pizza -which turned out to be a meat-fest. I wouldn't touch it so I ordered my own veggie one and he moaned bitterly ''bloody woman having her own brain''. I walked out and never ever had anything more to do with him.

Disaster ''date'' number two: I was 23, we were only going to a cafe so I didn't dress up, just wore a decent top, nice fluttery light-weight scarf and a decent pair of black trousers with flat casual shoes so I was tidy but comfortable. My hair was washed, dried, combed and tidy.

He told me I should be wearing a white top transparent enough to see my bra with buttons low enough ''to show some cleavage'' and stilettos. I snapped at him I'm not a prostitute, tipped his HOT tea all over him and walked out. He got burned .... good!

This sounds quite charming, not gonna lie