Stories of stingiest first dates

[frtedsbed]

Just comparing experiences here at a friends ... jaw dropping stuff!

Mine asked me to transfer money for a coffee and cake after our first date which was a walk and feeding the ducks.
I thought we were going for lunch ... that was the original invite.
Another asked me to transfer money to r a takeaway having offered to pay for my child and I , as he stayed at mine every weekend. Both ended there and then !

I was joking 😬

@nononocontact at a friends house for dinner I took a piece of kitchen paper from the roll to use as a napkin. She said oh no. They were her housemates, she said her housemate would probably notice and give out that she was taking her stuff!

@Oliviacoleman not a date but a guy who was part of my inter-railing group kept 'forgetting' his wallet. We were all just after finishing secondary school and not rich. I eventually said well you better go back and get it after he said that at the umpteenth place in a row. I wonder did he grow up to go on that date with you 😂

He didn't come back out that night but wrote on his myspace that we were bullies and that he would love to stab us in our sleep 😐we split from travelling with him the next day

FFS, that's horrific!

I used to go out a lot more - twice a week to the pub and once a week nightclubbing, and there was always that ONE person who had only a tenner in their purse, and 4 cigarettes in their cigarette packet. They would buy the first round, and hand out the first round of smokes, but would then cadge off everyone else all night. Would get another 6-8 drinks, and 10 ciggies over 4-5 hours. They were always on their last tenner, and last few smokes! (I don't smoke now, but did for 7-8 years when I was 17 to 25-ish.)

No you weren't. 😂

Agreed to go out on a date with a guy who I worked with and I agreed to meet him at the station as he lived in the city and didn't drive (the city wasn't that far away, only about 15 minutes on the train so the fair was like £4.50 at the time so not expensive. This is important). Anyway he arrived and then asked me for half his train fair as he'd had to travel in!

When I pointed out that I'd driven to the station to pick him up and was driving to the pub we'd agreed to have dinner in and should be charging him petrol costs he got remarkably quiet lol.

It didn't set the date up for a roaring success. We got to the pub and having previously agreed to split the bill he ordered the cheapest food item (think potatoes skins and some beans or something like that) and a glass of water. I ordered a pizza and some wine and he complained that my meal was better than his and more expensive! Apparently I should've ordered something comparable to his meal in solidarity. I laughed and reminded him of our agreement to pay for our own meal so I was going to eat and order what I wanted. I did offer to buy him something but he only grumbled.

I ate as quickly as I could and left. Dude asked me for a second date. It was a resounding 'no!' from me.

He earned nearly 100k as well, so wasn't short of a bob or two. Just awful.

What's the joke? I don't get it.

@pontipinemum that’s hilarious!! Another friend invited me round once and his live in landlord texted him to complain that I had used the toilet as it was “his” toilet roll I had used!!

No idea where these people come from or how they get on in the rest of their lives!

Ah! sorry, it's difficult to tell who's joking and who actually means some of the stuff on this thread.

Was this during the great loo roll shortage of 2020? 🤣

What a weird correlation in these few posts between the kind of posters who expect a man to pay for everything, and the kind of posters who think eating squid or rabbit is beyond the pale and hilariously "revolting".

😂 tough crowd!

The one who invited me to lunch and bought a couple of supermarket meal deals which we sat in the park and ate before he asked me for the £3 (IIRC) for the meal deal

THEN he suggested I bought him a coffee as a thank you for going to the shops...

I did buy the coffees because I wanted one but we didn't have a second date even though he sent a few text messages suggesting another lovely picnic😂

The thing is dating now is a game of numbers so it does get expensive if the man is always paying. Also there can be expectations of reward for buying expensive meals which didn'treally exist before. 30 years ago the men of our generation took 3 weeks to pluck up courage to ask the one person they fancied out. They then saved or borrowed to pay for the date but needed to strike a balance between looking generous but not too flash. There only hope at this stage was to get a 2nd date. If they didn't then they spent the next 3 months trying to find someone else they liked that might go out with them.
Times seemed to have changed a bit😁

Absolute tool. I wonder why he thought you would look better chubby? NO-ONE looks better chubby. I mean, you don't have to be thin/slim to look nice, and it's not a case of thin = attractive, fat = ugly. I have seen some bigger women who look lovely, and some thinner women who don't look great.

But any particular individual will look better slimmer IMO. Don't have to be a size 6 or 8, but just not 'fat.' Curvy/slightly overweight yes that's fine. Less than 2 stone overweight is OK IMO. I look OK anything up to 2 to 2.5 stone overweight, then I start to look a bit shit. Too much weight on me doesn't suit me.

As I say, some women look fine with quite a bit of extra weight, but look better without it. (Same with men!)

Not disgusting as such if you're a meat eater, but a very weird combination, which was apparently not great. If you read my post I never once stated he was expected to pay for everything, merely split and then paid for nothing with added extras and never asked for the money back. Where's the correlation then?

OMG this reminds me of a guy I was seeing and we were travelling from London Euston to go to a concert and we both went to the loos for a pee before our train was due. It's a double barrier there (or it was at the time) so both men and women go through the same set of barriers before going left or right to go to their respective loos.

Anyway, I put in my 20p for the barrier and he pushes me out of the way to get through! Like really shoves me to the side and leapt through the barrier to use my money. I was like WTF! He winked at me as if he was being some cheeky chappy rogue (which I hate anyway). I told him we were going to the concert separately after that stunt (thankfully I knew other people going so joined their group) and dumped him there and then. Can't even use his own 20p to use the toilet. Dick.

Interestingly though, my exH, my adult DC dad, gives our DS money to pay for the first date as often the young woman doesn't have an income as still in education and he wants to take her out. My DS likes to pay. Sometimes the young woman will go halves but sometimes not and will accept his offer. He's been in a relationship now for about a year, they're both 18 with pt jobs and I believe they go halves. My daughter has worked ft since 18 and has always paid her way on dates. Again, her dad would give her money before she had a ft job to enable her to pay her half. She earned more than her ex bf so would pay a little more for things, like I did, when I was earning more than her dad (who is now wealthy following huge career progression whilst I went pt and brought up our DC, plus a large inheritance).

please God tell me you said no.

Going slightly against the grain here but I also hate the opposite. I’ve had men insist we go to fancy champagne bars (I hate champagne and cocktails) super fancy restaurants (I’m vegetarian and often these places only have one crap
option) When I tell them this they still won’t budge- presumably to look flash!

Pisses me off as much as splitting 2 drinks.

It is stingy to split such a small bill, so why didn't you pay it. It was a coke, why on earth did you not pay for his coke?

Really interesting to read as these as in my culture it would be absolutely outrageous to expect the woman to pay on any date ever even 50 50.
Most men from my culture would be so offended if you even asked.

Some of these stories are about outright scammers tho, it feels to me like the detail they were on a 'date' is just a detail.

In some cases, it seems like the guy has met the person in person and then decided they didn't fancy them and therefore changed their mind about whether to pay.

I get the frothing that women shouldn't automatically expect to be paid for on a first date but it does feel in some of these situations like something changed after the arrangement was made that is a bit off.

Fucking - let's go for dinner and drinks and then it's like, no we'll go for a walk. I mean - what?

Reading back, I see the thread has pissed off various obvious incels... that's worth any number of drinks. Try buying the lady a Coke, guys, it might improve your luck. As if you've got anything better to spend a couple of quid on anyway.

What culture is that?

Fab post!