Ever fallen for a friend?

[Pegs11]

Have you ever had the hots for/had feelings for a friend? How did things pan out?

Oh yes. Best friend. I was not single, she was. Circled it for ages, told her, she felt the same. I finished relationship and we got together, lived together, bought a house together.
Then she fell for someone else. Three years to separate and they were the most painful years of my life. I'm a different person on the other side.
It was what it was of course. I still think of her as 'the love of my life'. This is 25 years later.
I'm with someone else now, a man- I am and always have been bisexual.

Yeah. But we're both married. It's hard. And I'm not sure where it's headed really.

Yes. Both married. It’s ruining my life.

Yep. Had the absolute biggest crush on a friend for about five years now. I’m perfectly happily married, my dh is a nice guy, no marital issues whatsoever. Just cannot explain why I have these feelings for my friend.

Can’t really avoid him, our kids are friends and we’ve become friends through them and often socialise together. I hope to god I’ve never given him any indication of how I feel as I imagine we’d both be mortified.

I get butterflies whenever I see him. I think about him sometimes. Definitely had some very improper thoughts.

He’s divorced so I don’t have to feel guilty about a wife but my god do I feel guilty about my poor dh. He doesn’t deserve it.

Bloody ridiculous.

Yes - married now with a DS. Easiest relationship I've ever had!! Feel very lucky.

I married my work friend, second time round for both of us we are very happy!

Twice, once with a long term friend and once a fairly new friend. Both ended in heartbreak (mine) unfortunately.

I stayed friends with both but it wasn't quite the same although one was a groomsman at my wedding so we did manage to salvage a friendship and my husband is fine with this.

Yes. He was a friend of my db and then also became a friend of mine. Unfortunately, he was single when I wasn’t and I was single when he wasn’t. We stayed in touch too frequently and too intensely for just a friendship over the course of around 6-7 years and finally decided we needed to cut contact as it was impacting both our marriages. That was a year ago. I don’t think I’ll ever get over him but it is what it is.

Yep. Married him. Just approaching 30 years now.

Yes. We fell for each other. Both married to other people. We don't speak anymore. I wish it hadn't gone to that place.

Would you rather you'd have kept him in your life as a friend, or did you feel that wasn't possible?

I'm leaning towards the former but I don't know if I am fooling myself.

I'd much rather we stayed in each other's lives as friends, but we would have been lying to ourselves - we didn't see each other as friends anymore. Once the line was crossed, we couldn't go back.

Yes. I fell for a work friend. Well we fell for eachother when both in different relationships. We both ended the relationships and got together and now happily married 2 years later

Well DH and I were friends before we got together. Very good friends. A lot of people I know were friends first before getting together.

Yes. We fooled around once. We aren't and weren't right for each other. She was decent about that from the start. She's now one of my ride-or-die besties whereas a romantic relationship would have ended beyond catastrophically.

Yes. Work colleague, and it was mutual. We were also both happily married, so never spoke about it, hunkered down and waited for it to pass. Still friends, both still married, but now we live in different countries.

An online friend, yep. Together 20 years now, married 14.

It's just one of many ways two people can end up involved, no more or less likely to succeed than any other.

I fancied a work colleague but I got a transfer to get away...plus I wasn't getting on well with the managers where I was. We were both married. I don't know if he liked me but he was, and still is incredibly kind. We have mutual friends so his name pops up occasionally but that's it, I won't contact him ever again. I was going through some awful stuff and he helped me through it. I couldn't help but like him too much.

Yep. Currently work colleagues but lm trying to extract myself from the job. About 10-15% is due to the proximity being too hard mentally to them and the rest as managers / other colleagues taking the piss. I drunkenly declared my feelings a while back, a few weeks after he drunkenly kissed me. Problem is lm in a dying marriage (rot had already set in with my husbands cheating with someone then inviting them to our wedding, DV and financial irregularities) and we have very young children. Friend is single but has a complicated life with lots of baggage. God knows where this is going to end up -if anything

Yes, we knew each other through work for 8 years. Went to a wedding of two mutual friends from work, got together at it. That was 2011, now married nearly 7 years.

Yes. Decades ago. Both single at the time. Definitely fell for him but pretty good at concealing feelings. Good friends now. Probably one of the few men I trust to have my back.

Yep, married him.

Only serious relationships I have had started as friendships. I don’t really understand how anyone dates any other way. I’m just not built like that.

some worked out, some didn’t. Ultimately married my best friend and we have been together for many years.

Absolutely, in fact I’m in love with one of my best friends. I’m married, she isn’t (she was the first few years we knew each other) and we had an affair/fling for a couple of months, both told each other we loved each other. She ended it for various reasons and we’re back to being good friends. I’ve no idea if she knows how I still feel but I suspect she does. Not the best situation and if I’m honest my mind is a bit of a mess over the whole thing.

Yes married him.