He’s bankrupt, broken…I don’t know if I can do this

[Jasmine1973]

10 years ago I have become a single mum of 2…haunted by the narrative that no man would take on a woman with 2 kids I have ended up dating guys who have treated me poorly. Finally, 6 months ago I met a guy on bumble, we hit it off and both fell for each other very quickly. The relationship was initially filled with so much laughter, a strong connection and love. He is divorced twice, has moved around countless times and has been in lots of relationships (nothing lasting more than a year). He even gifted me with chlamydia (which in his defence he might not have known about). He has his own business and was initially successful until recently. Over the course of a month I have watch his business crash..losing everything. He is absolutely broken, crying non stop, often cold towards me. I am trying my best to support him but it’s starting to take its toll on my mental wellbeing. Friends tell me to walk away but my love for him is as strong as ever. I acknowledge he might be heading for a breakdown and I just don’t know how to cope? Do I just walk away? How do I support him? When I told him the whole situation was upsetting for me he responded with he didn’t need that additional stress. I’m so confused.

I doubt his business has gone from buoyant to crashing within six months. He sounds full of red flags and you have dc to consider, cut your losses and end it.

How old are your children? Have they met him?
And just leave - you don't need him dragging you down.

This trail of broken relationships sounds like a pattern... And this is your experience too, now? Your comment rings alarm bells for me:

"He is divorced twice, has moved around countless times and has been in lots of relationships (nothing lasting more than a year). He even gifted me with chlamydia"

Personally if he's being cold, I would follow his lead and distance yourself... Sorry if this is painful to hear but this sounds like it's doomed to fail through no fault of your own. It's just his way...

I agree, it’s rare for a business to crash and burn in six months. It must’ve been in trouble for some time. He doesn’t have a very secure history of anything I would be careful, especially when you have DCs to consider.

The man has more red flags than a communist party convention. Run away. Save yourself.

Could he be a scammer?!?!?

I would have left at the Chlamydia gift point.

Do not lend him money

nope, I would’ve called it a day after the chlamydia

⛳️🇳🇵🚩

He’s a walking disaster.

Get rid now before you get embroiled into a lifetime of shit.

What the fuck? He gave you Chlamydia? And that wasn't bad enough? His business hasn't gone bust in a month, it's been a long time coming.

Do yourself a favour and focus on yourself and your kids and stop subjecting them to a string on inappropriate men. This man is not a good one and it's only been six months.

I think op, you know that there's red flags here with him or you'd be asking us how to support him with his bankruptcy and the crashing of his business without needing to tell us about his lengthy relationship background and the fact he gave you chlamydia. The need you felt to share that information tells me that you in yourself don't feel that it's right and actually you're not listening to your own gut instinct. Which is where the pattern of being treated badly by guys is recurring. You not trusting your instincts and listening to yourself when it's time to leave.

He may not have known that he had chlamydia, but he did know he is responsible for his own sexual health and put you at risk by not owning that responsibility.

At first read of ur title I thought what a shame but bankruptcy isn’t the end of the world. Most of us r two missed wages away from it but then reading the rest I think you should get out now. Multiple divorces, moving around, company probs been going tits up for a while, the STD… It is a shame for him yes but it’s a lot for u to take on. Id cut my losses and distance myself massively here.

What the hell have I just read.

I also have slightly higher expectations of gifts

HermioneWeasley · Today 20:13

The man has more red flags than a communist party convention. Run away. Save yourself.

...........

basically; he seems goes around, ruining womens' lives. He should stop doing this because is totally nasty and irresponsible

Dump him and stay single, this is not good enough for your children.

6 months in, all this red bunting everywhere...and your love for him is as strong as ever.
I truly don't think we can help you.

You’ve only known him six months. Your kids deserve more than you supporting him. The number of red flags are alarming. Walk away and don’t look back.

I couldn't concentrate on the OP once I read gifted me with chlamydia.

Walk away. Is there a reason you didn't use condoms in such a very new relationship? You were playing romantic roulette with your health there. Like others have said the minute he'd given me an STI I'd have dumped.

Oh, dear. He’s a scammer.

6 months in, you should still be in the honeymoon period, not recovering from chlamydia, dealing with this kind of mental load and putting up with him being cold to you. You deserve way better. Don't feel guilted into staying with him. Walk away from this relationship or it won't be long before he's a full on cocklodger.