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Original poster

What have I done for ex to hate me like he does?

118 replies

turnitonon · 08/02/2024 19:13

Me and my ex had a bad breakup 4 years ago.
He did the bad things to me,I did him no wrong.
After we broke up,stupidly we started speaking even tho we knew to stay away.
Eventually we cut ties,I deleted him off social media except for Facebook -I just deleted my account.
It's been 4 years now and I'm engaged and live with my fiance and we have just bought a house.
I'm in a good place and I reactivated my Facebook.
Uploaded some recent pics of us and started using my Facebook.
My ex was still on my fb and after 4 years all my upset was gone and I didn't feel the need to remove him.
A week he viewed my fb stories
I posted Nothing exciting ,just me and fiance,our weekend away,a few pics of our house.
Anyway it took a week I noticed my friends went down ,had a feeling it was him and it was -he deleted me.
Now bare in mind his fb is full of ex's (when we were together he told me he didn't delete them as no point )
We have Facebook mutual friends with another of his ex,women he slept with (he wishes them happy birthday)

I don't understand how he did me wrong,ruined any chance of happiness with us,yet he is the one deleting me.
I thought after 4 years and our memories ,maybe we could of just been civil (well not civil but not hate enough to have to remove each other off fb )
Why ?
I don't get it

OP posts:
10ThousandSpoons · 08/02/2024 19:15

It's just Facebook. He's decided he can't handle seeing you move on or he's decided he doesn't want to stay in touch. Why do you care so much?

solice84 · 08/02/2024 19:18

Why do you care?

Paddy667788 · 08/02/2024 19:19

I wonder if you need to examine why you feel disappointed that he can’t see your engagement posts. Were you hoping for him to see you happy and over him?

Nothing wrong with wanting that, but I wonder if that’s your real upset.

But honestly, he sounds awful, just move on and forget it.

taylorswift1989 · 08/02/2024 19:22

You haven't spoken to him for 4 years. I imagine he's moved on too. Neither of you want to be friends now. So what's the problem? Why assume he hates you? Maybe he just didn't realise you were still friends on fb and after satisfying his curiosity decided it wasn't healthy to keep that line of communication open.

I'd be more worried about why you seem to care so much?

IncognitoUsername · 08/02/2024 19:22

Why are you bothered? He’s an ex for a reason. Maybe he thought it was time to let you go as you are obviously happy now. Maybe he was insane with jealousy and deleted you in a fit of pique. Either way it shouldn’t bother you f you ave moved on from him.

Original poster
turnitonon · 08/02/2024 19:30

It's not that I'm bothered and I won't loose any sleep over it ,it's just the irony that he ruined things and it's almost like he's the victim.
He always had the ability to get under my skin.
He has all of his ex's but can't seem to stomach me.

OP posts:
Spirallingdownwards · 08/02/2024 19:30

He's not happy atmosphere and doesn't want to see you happy.

I am more concerned why you care and why you checked whether it was him who unfriended you. That's stranger.

Original poster
turnitonon · 08/02/2024 19:32

@Spirallingdownwards when I reactivated I seen his Facebook posts,I had a feeling it would be him.
I couldn't think anyone else would randomly remove me.

OP posts:
Original poster
turnitonon · 08/02/2024 19:48

It's just strange for me when he has every other ex /person he's slept with bar me.
I would understand if I had cheated /hurt him
I guess it's just one of them things il never understand

OP posts:
10ThousandSpoons · 08/02/2024 19:51

turnitonon · 08/02/2024 19:30

It's not that I'm bothered and I won't loose any sleep over it ,it's just the irony that he ruined things and it's almost like he's the victim.
He always had the ability to get under my skin.
He has all of his ex's but can't seem to stomach me.

No it's not. He's seen you've moved on and he probably has too or if he hasn't he's realised you have and is just leaving you be. It's really not that deep.

10ThousandSpoons · 08/02/2024 19:51

Does your fiance know this is bugging you?

IncognitoUsername · 08/02/2024 19:55

I find this all a bit odd to be honest. I would have no idea how many friends I have on FB and even if I did I wouldn’t worry if the number dropped by one.
Do you still have feelings for him?

WhatWhereWho · 08/02/2024 20:02

turnitonon · 08/02/2024 19:30

It's not that I'm bothered and I won't loose any sleep over it ,it's just the irony that he ruined things and it's almost like he's the victim.
He always had the ability to get under my skin.
He has all of his ex's but can't seem to stomach me.

You obviously are bothered because you are posting about it here. If you truly did not care you would have thought oh well and got on with your day.

Original poster
turnitonon · 08/02/2024 20:06

I can't explain why and up until activating my fb never thought about him.
He always had the ability to get under my skin.
It bothered me ,I don't know why
I wish I did
It makes no sense to me why he can have his ex's (who have moved on ) people he's slept with etc
Yet seems to hate me that he can't even look at me (when he hurt me )

OP posts:
IncognitoUsername · 08/02/2024 20:08

You are giving this far too much headspace. He’s the past and the past is gone. Move on with your own fiancé and forget him.

Letsseeshallwe · 08/02/2024 20:10

You seem to care far more than he does.

aitchteeaitch · 08/02/2024 20:12

Maybe he's filled with guilt and remorse, now he sees that you have moved on and are now engaged, he can't face knowing you are so happy without him.

Maybe he realises what he lost.

Maybe he decided the best thing to do was remove himself from social media.

Maybe he doesn't hate you at all.

MamaAlwaysknowsbest · 08/02/2024 20:15

He does not hate you, there is no point in you being there for him anymore.

Indifferentchickenwings · 08/02/2024 20:19

He deleted you because the photos made him feel sad or jealous
DOH

IncognitoUsername · 08/02/2024 20:24

Maybe he deleted his FB
Maybe he got hacked and had to start again
Maybe he has a new controlling girlfriend ho made him delete you.

Who knows?!

MrsTerryPratchett · 08/02/2024 20:27

Letsseeshallwe · 08/02/2024 20:10

You seem to care far more than he does.

This. You're bothered about him. Time to do a little self-reflection before you get married, I think.

Anjea · 08/02/2024 20:28

Why do you think he hates you? Maybe he just finds it boring.

SanFranBear · 08/02/2024 20:37

Wow... that's not hate, not even close! There are many women using this site - me included - who's exes genuinely hate them - they're vindictive, spiteful, use DC as weapons and cause physical and mental harm!

I'm sorry but I couldn't get worked up over a FB deletion and wish life was really that bloody easy!

10ThousandSpoons · 08/02/2024 20:44

I think you should seek counselling prior to booking your wedding

ElevenSeven · 08/02/2024 20:47

So it was ok for you to delete him from your social media, but not ok for him to do the same?

He’s just not interested in what you’re up to, would be my guess. Who is, after 4 years?!