What have I done for ex to hate me like he does?

[turnitonon]

Me and my ex had a bad breakup 4 years ago.
He did the bad things to me,I did him no wrong.
After we broke up,stupidly we started speaking even tho we knew to stay away.
Eventually we cut ties,I deleted him off social media except for Facebook -I just deleted my account.
It's been 4 years now and I'm engaged and live with my fiance and we have just bought a house.
I'm in a good place and I reactivated my Facebook.
Uploaded some recent pics of us and started using my Facebook.
My ex was still on my fb and after 4 years all my upset was gone and I didn't feel the need to remove him.
A week he viewed my fb stories
I posted Nothing exciting ,just me and fiance,our weekend away,a few pics of our house.
Anyway it took a week I noticed my friends went down ,had a feeling it was him and it was -he deleted me.
Now bare in mind his fb is full of ex's (when we were together he told me he didn't delete them as no point )
We have Facebook mutual friends with another of his ex,women he slept with (he wishes them happy birthday)

I don't understand how he did me wrong,ruined any chance of happiness with us,yet he is the one deleting me.
I thought after 4 years and our memories ,maybe we could of just been civil (well not civil but not hate enough to have to remove each other off fb )
Why ?
I don't get it

Also, you probably posted those things hoping that he'd react...He did..just not in the way that you'd hoped.

Cancel everything with the new partner. Tell him the truth about what you've been doing, and your feelings towards the ex.

You're not in a good headspace.
Perhaps therapy would be beneficial.

Why TF do you care!??? Who notices their friend count and then checks?

You're asking so many "why" questions but you aren't answering the main one - Why do you care so much?

I thought FB accounts were permanently deleted after 30 days so how did you reactivate after 4 years?

Does it matter?

You started posting. He decided you aren’t someone he wants to see updates on. Or he wants seeing updates on his life. So removed you.

Up until you reactivated your account you had no updates on eachother. You now don’t get updates in eachother. The situation hasn’t changed.

How have you decided that this means he hates you? He probably just isn’t bothered about remaining in touch.

You need to snap out of this thinking

Exes remaining friends tends to be an awkward relationship to navigate; he might still find you attractive, or maybe he finds you annoying, or maybe he’s not happy with how things ended, or maybe you just bring up bad vibes/memories and he doesn’t care for it. Regardless of the exact thought process, you’ve both moved on.

You are now engaged to someone else - I’d be pissed if my fiance was wondering why his ex deleted him from social media, your post almost reads like your ex is the one that got away! You really shouldn’t give this so much headspace. People remove others from social media every day. The fact you’re checking if he still has other exes on his friends list is a bit much! And this doesn’t mean he hates you. But even if he does hate you, why do you care?

Your poor fiancé. I’d question the relationship if I knew the person I was marrying was obsessing about whether their ex wanted to be their ‘Facebook friend’, I mean jeez!

Snap out of worrying about what your ex is or isn’t doing. It doesn’t matter that he has other women he slept with on there. You should not care.

Would you really be happy of your fiancé was wasting headspace on an ex?

You use “he must hate me”, with the implicit “I have space in his head”. Have you considered that it’s “God, I’m so embarrassed I ever knew her” or “God, she’s so vacuous Face-bragging and clogging up my feed” or any one of a million other reasons. The truth is you have no clue about him and what’s going on in his life/head and are just making it up.
The whole “under my skin” schtick is also so lame, and so disrespectful to your fiancé- imagine him having this sort of fantasy life about an ex. It’s actually pathetic.

Worrying that you care so much.

Do you post frequently? I think this annoys some people to see the same person's posts popping up in their timeline and they don't realise they can "hide" rather than delete.

I use my FB as a sort of photo diary for my own use and enjoyment but I can see why others might think I'm showing off/posting too much at times and I've noticed a few people disappear off my friends list when I've had a busy spell. It doesn't bother me though. I admit I hide people myself when their posts are getting on my tits 🤣

After 4 years apart, you still care what he thinks and why he does what he does.

That isn't healthy, and if I was your OH I would be concerned why you care about it.

His actions don't mean he hates you. But even if he did hate you - it shouldn't bother you. You shouldn't care. He can still get under your skin and it would be worth spending some time thinking about that.

There's no way I would ever want to swap what I have with my fiance than my ex.
My ex put me through hell,mentally,messed with my head,gaslighted me /the list goes on but for some stupid reason I thought that now that I was out of it ,I could finally show I'm okay and he's horrible treatment didn't win.
He always gets under my skin because yes I let him.
My fiance is a million times a better person than him.
He has my friend on his Facebook who he met once,so it's not him deleting people who aren't relevant either.

Goodness op; you’re far from over him. Some of these answers are bullshit, he doesn’t want to see you happy nonsense. He just isn’t interested, it’s tha simple

the issue is why are you so obsessed and putting all these thoughts into him no longer being an online friend, and so much you need to start a thread and clearly stalk his social media so you know who he is friends with.

Yet seems to hate me that he can't even look at me (when he hurt me )

it doesn’t mean he hates you. It means he isn’t interested. You’re far from ok. And may need counselling to move on.

It all seems very childish. Ignore and move on.

Delete Facebook. Concentrate on your own life. There will be lots of questions in life you will never get an answer to & lots of situations you won't understand why people behave as they do. This is a lesson for you to learn, that some things just are and you will do better to stop giving them head space.

This isn't correct. The 30 days I think related to a request for permanent deletion.

Maybe he even forgot you were on there.
Maybe he doesn’t hate you
Maybe he isn’t the least bit interested in you, your fiancé, your house
Maybe he’s out there living his best life with a new partner
Maybe you wanted him to be jealous
Maybe he doesn’t care a jot….
Maybe you’re upset that he doesn’t care a jot……

I think it’s obvious that you’re still in love with your ex and you haven’t fully recovered from him cheating on you. You’re still craving his approval and felt rejected again when he removed you on Facebook. This has reminded you of the devastated feelings you had four years ago.

Except, you’re hurting yourself this time. If an ex cheated on me, I’d want absolutely nothing to do with him including a fake facebook friendship.

It doesn’t matter why your ex did or does anything at all. No-one can give you the answers you’re looking for. You need to stop focussing on him and give all your attention to your fiance.

I think you need to focus on your impending marriage and move on.

Given your overly invested interest in the reason why he might have deleted you and not others could maybe identify why he deleted you. Stop obsessing!

I'd be really upset if my fiancé was this over invested with an ex.

Couldn't have said it better.
Who gives a fuck?

Sorry OP, but this is the type of thing that maybe you randomly mention to a mate and comment that it's strange and keep it moving.

You have a life to look forward to and if he's still getting under your skin you need to do some self reflection and work on that.

I'd be pissed if I knew my fiance was obsessing over his ex's Facebook.

I hadn't read your latest update when I posted about this being the type of comment I'd make randomly to a friend and then move on.
I would never be friends, virtually or otherwise, with someone who treated me like you say he did to you. PERIOD