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Original poster

Yes or no to partner going to a strip club

124 replies

shatteredL · 03/02/2024 18:16

Just curious really as me and my partner discussed it earlier out of the blue (we're not engaged and don't plan to be🤣)

Would you be okay with your partner going to a strip club and having a lap dance on their stag do, if they were honest about it and didn't try to conceal etc?

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 03/02/2024 18:18

Flip it. If you gyrated with very few clothes on the lap of another man for fun at your hen, would he think that was OK? No? Then it's not. Why women think the money removes the issue I'll never know.

LauraNorda · 03/02/2024 18:18

You don't own him. Plenty of women go to strip shows, why not men?

sprigatito · 03/02/2024 18:19

I wouldn't be marrying someone who was comfortable with commodifying women's bodies in the first place. Gross.

Oneofthesurvivors · 03/02/2024 18:19

No. Objectification of women is a dealbreaker.

MinervatheGreat · 03/02/2024 18:20

MrsTerryPratchett · 03/02/2024 18:18

Flip it. If you gyrated with very few clothes on the lap of another man for fun at your hen, would he think that was OK? No? Then it's not. Why women think the money removes the issue I'll never know.

This ^

thatneverhappened · 03/02/2024 18:21

I trust my DP wholeheartedly so would trust him to spend time with any female and he'd be faithful to me but I don't think he'd ever go to that kind of place because he understands they're exploiting women

faustus5 · 03/02/2024 18:22

I think it sets the tone for the stag night - not great. Nor something that would encourage my admiration or respect for a future partner, or his choice of best mate who may be organising and making such choices.

Ponderingwindow · 03/02/2024 18:24

lap Dance is a hard no. It counts as cheating in my relationship.

Opentooffers · 03/02/2024 18:24

Someone else's stag maybe if part of a group. Their own stag, I'd be more disappointed if they wanted to do it themselves rather than feeling they had to follow.

Original poster
shatteredL · 03/02/2024 18:25

LauraNorda · 03/02/2024 18:18

You don't own him. Plenty of women go to strip shows, why not men?

As the post says, not my personal experience we were just discussing it earlier and I was curious. We've actually been to a strip club together pissed up in Prague haha

OP posts:
Original poster
shatteredL · 03/02/2024 18:29

Yeah I said I'd be okay with a strip club, basing that agreement on the fact his friend has arranged it and not that he just wants to go to one. Lapdance is a big no for me personally. It's the thought of him enjoying someone else touching him like that

OP posts:
Flatleak · 03/02/2024 18:29

Lap dance is cheating. Would it be ok if your partner went to a pub and let a woman climb in his lap and grind on him? Her being a stripper doesn't make it better.

And men who buy sexual favours from women are disgusting

5128gap · 03/02/2024 18:33

I wouldn't marry the type of man who wanted to go to a strip club on his stag do, so I'd never have to be happy or unhappy about it. If the man I married suddenly revealed himself to be a sleezy creep at the 11th hour and said he did want to, that would be entirely his decision. He'd have to change the name for his holiday from 'stag do' though, as he'd not be needing one of those.

Corondel · 03/02/2024 18:37

sprigatito · 03/02/2024 18:19

I wouldn't be marrying someone who was comfortable with commodifying women's bodies in the first place. Gross.

Exactly this.

If you think purchasing the sexual use of women’s bodies is in any way OK, you are a revolting, dysfunctional human being, and I wouldn’t want to share a train carriage with you, far less my life.

SpringleDingle · 03/02/2024 18:39

Lap dance is no-touchy!!!

Wouldnt bother me to be honest. I’ve been to strip clubs, a bit tawdry and dull to be honest!

Lavenderosa · 03/02/2024 18:41

Only if they were agreeable to me doing the same thing if I wanted to.

GreyCarpet · 03/02/2024 18:43

SpringleDingle · 03/02/2024 18:39

Lap dance is no-touchy!!!

Wouldnt bother me to be honest. I’ve been to strip clubs, a bit tawdry and dull to be honest!

Every time one of these threads is posted, at least one woman comes on to say this. And at least one other woman comes on to say she used to work in a club and that the show they put on when wives or girlfriends are there is very different to the sort of show they put on for men only.

Very tame to reassure the women so that the men are more likely to return in future.

CaramelCarmen · 03/02/2024 18:51

No, not ok in my relationship.

halfthesun · 03/02/2024 18:57

Absolutely not. If my DH wanted to go he would not be the person for me. My x went on a regular basis - worked in the city and would take clients etc. still can't believe I put up with his crap - he ended up screwing my best mate ... probably not related Confused

JenniferBooth · 03/02/2024 18:58

Would he be happy with you doing that job @shatteredL

Original poster
shatteredL · 03/02/2024 18:59

halfthesun · 03/02/2024 18:57

Absolutely not. If my DH wanted to go he would not be the person for me. My x went on a regular basis - worked in the city and would take clients etc. still can't believe I put up with his crap - he ended up screwing my best mate ... probably not related Confused

Ewww he sounds like a wanker and you're well rid of him clearly!

OP posts:
Original poster
shatteredL · 03/02/2024 18:59

JenniferBooth · 03/02/2024 18:58

Would he be happy with you doing that job @shatteredL

No but he also has no intention of going either, we were just discussing it in passing. We're not engaged or planning to be ☺️

OP posts:
MonsteraMama · 03/02/2024 19:00

No from me, I'm not ok with the exploitation and commodification of young and potentially vulnerable women and I wouldn't be ok with my husband thinking that's acceptable either.

sexnotgenders · 03/02/2024 19:02

sprigatito · 03/02/2024 18:19

I wouldn't be marrying someone who was comfortable with commodifying women's bodies in the first place. Gross.

Exactly. I'd divorce my DH in an instant if he went to a strip club. But then, we wouldn't even be together in the first place if he was the kind of man that thought that was ever ok

ScottishShortie · 03/02/2024 19:06

My first ‘DH’ got a private dance from a stripper on his stag then a souvenir photo with six of them, all topless….which he decided to show me to see my reaction. He was an abusive monster.