OLD - Hello as a first message - instant unmatch?

[Vegandiva]

That’s it really, I’m wondering if anyone has ever had a decent relationship with someone whose first message on OLD after matching is a zero effort Hello, Hi, How are you, Hey, etc. 🙂

I always unmatch anyone who makes so little effort for a first message. Or anyone who doesn’t message first within a certain amount of time.

it doesn’t speak volumes for how they’ll be actually arranging a date or being in a relationship if they can’t even say something remotely
interesting off the bat.

No. And I gave the fit ones a chance. Never ever turned interesting.

Wow, saying hello to you, what a rude thing to do🙄. What exactly do you want them to say?

Would you prefer a shitty chat up line or a random question right off the bat?

Saying hello is polite. The conversation then evolves and gives an indication of what type of person you are talking to.

I'm with @Scalottia and @yhk

What an odd way to think.

I would rather someone is normal than trying too hard to impress. I can’t be imaginative with it either. If I bumped into someone in the street I’d be more impressed by interesting conversation than a one liner. The one guy I have had any luck with online was normal chat and he never mentioned sex which was refreshing!

It’s not rude. It’s just low effort. How hard is it to demonstrate actual interest in someone?

@Rainydays777

So what should they start with? What exactly is wrong with Hello?

Well just saying hello is lazy. I'd not be looking for a cheesy one liner, but a little bit of an introduction and something showing a little interest in you would be polite.
Just 'hello' is expecting the other person to do all the work.

So what would you do? Just say hello back?
Is saying hello code for being interested?

Something that actually starts a conversation or demonstrates a bit of interest or personality.

honestly how easy does it have to be for them? Online dating already makes the whole thing low effort.

My husband actually said Hello three times before realising he had cocked up. Nothing wrong with a simple hello!

No wonder online dating doesn't work for some if their expectations are so high. My partner said hello (how terrible!). We have been together for 8 years.

I still don't understand what you want them to say!

Can we have an example of your own superior introductions to benchmark this against?

Hello is fine.

Tbh, I find witty remarks unbearable. They're always the same thing! I had to constantly keep changing my bio so I wouldn't get the exact same smart arse comments.

Depends if you make an effort to write something interesting on your 'about me' profile for them to bounce off a message to....

Yes always delete if the first message is one word, an emoji, a wave or something cheesy or sleazy.

When I message first I show I’ve their profile by referring to something they’ve mentioned, their interests etc. it’s easy to make a bit of effort.

Out of interest, how did you reply?

My single friends are always moaning about the fact that they are single, why can’t they find anyone etc.

Suspect this is why. Binning guys off for saying hello…

I wouldn’t bother with a hello but a question like ‘how are you?’ would get a reply 🤷🏻‍♀️

How does "do you fancy a chat" shape up in the OLD intro hierarchy?

I've replied to a "hello" with a "hello to you" to see what happens next and it was usually not much!
Of course there's nothing wrong with saying hello but I don't know if people are being obtuse - all it takes us a "Hello, how are you, thanks for matching with me, or other inane comment to get a conversation going. It's the same in real life, you usually follow hello up with something!

I met my partner on Tinder. The first messages I got that made me unmatch...

-Hello
-Hi
-Hi Delix, how was your day? Mine was busy so just having a cuppa and a custard cream
-Alright sexy
-Hi, shall we have a phone call?

My partner's first message was warm, fun, picked up on things in my profile. A shade of flirt but subtle and classy.

I recently had ‘wow cracking tits’ as an opener

Needless to say that was an instant delete

Pretty sure my DH started with Hello when we matched, which then lead to great conversation.

No wonder online dating is such hard work with all these made up rules.