What one weird thing has killed a relationship stone dead in an instant for you?

[talkingmongoose]

Just something that told you there was nooooo future?

I was seeing a chap quite some years ago, pre DH. We had been dating about a year, and were getting into bed at his place when I mentioned that I had my period, just in a casual 'so no rumpy-pumpy tonight' kind of way. The issue had never come up before.

He went all pale with disgust, said 'I wish you hadn't told me that', and proceeded to sleep on the floor.

Utter, utter twunt, I never returned his calls after that. Lucky escape.

Went to a stately home with my entire family - my parents, my brother's in-laws, the lot, plus my then bf. There were a lot of wasps around the bins, which he proceeded to karate kick, leaping all over the place, shouting 'hi-YAA', for literally ten minutes. Couldn't get him to stop. Probably the most embarrassing experience of my life, and I still bloody married him. Idiot woman.

this thread is funny

When my dream man finally seduced me, after weeks of delicious anticipation ... he turned out to be unbelievably boring in bed. I was staring at the ceiling thinking 'he reminds me of a sewing machine', struggling not to laugh. End of infatuation.

eemie, I do hope that wasn't because his thingy was like a needle...

I went out with someone once who called himself CCQ which stood for captain come quick he seemed rather proud of this fact. I shared the info with my friends, as you do hehe, and his brother also used the same nickname with my friend who was going out with him at the time.

Didn't last long that one, plus the fact he always tried to stick his finger up my bum during sex really turned me off.

One ex used a glow in the dark condom once and pretended it was a light sabre from star wars , didn't really set the mood.

These are all about sex, aren't they?

Good job 'no sex before marriage' has died a death; can you imagine the amount of instant divorces there'd be??

This isn't about sex tearinghairout. Being threatened with a shotgun by an alcoholic because I was late home. I moved out the next morning.

Actually it is about sex. I was late home because I was shagging someone else. But the drunken gunslinger didn't know that.

OMG NorksBride

bump

There was a guy i had a brief fling who was, in retrospect, so incredibly obviously gay and in denial (there were just so many things) I don't know why I couldn't see it. We started to mess around and he just couldn't get it up no matter what we did. I left my earrings and went back for them the next day and he couldn't wait to shove me back out the door!

I hope he's had the guts to come out now.

There was also the guy who told me in no uncertain terms on the second date that his (as yet non-existenet) kids were going to boarding school no matter what their mum thought!

There's some shallow bitches up in this thread.

The guy who had a framed photo of himself on his bedside drawers.
The guy who refused to admit he had a drug problem (I had a friend with one and the signs were glaring) I searched his coat, found his 'works' and a massive bag of heroin no thanks. He was infuriating anyway, he once washed a single shirt in my machine on a full wash when there was a pile of laundry right there waiting! And put his bare foot in my face when he'd had a shower and I was sitting on the sofa. And he said 'circular' instead of 'round'. Harrumph.
I've had a cocktail sausage guy too there was really nothing I could do with it!

Oh, and smackhead guy had a MASSIVE HEAD.

Care to specify, skil?

I had been seeing "gorgeous Dan" for about 2 weeks and was smitten...he was truly stunning, amazing dancer, witty etc...we hadn't gone all the way but had fooled around.

One night we had a great time out with mates and went back to his flat which was one of those trendy ex-factory/warehouse places....I'm sitting on his futon with a glass of wine and he's in the bathroom....he then reapears iin full Nazi uniform which he informs me his ex girlfriend loved.

We didn't have sex.

I'm on this thread, message withdrawn (I had my posts deleted for privacy reasons), and I cannot remember what I wrote. How infuriating.

I hope it was about the guy who put his semi-flaccid penis on the palm of his hand and said "I present my piece."

Aged 15, dating a guy of 22, tip top snogging and a bit of what was obviously a bit of dry humping (was such an innocent I was wondering what the hell was going on) At the 'ahem' main moment, I honestly thought that he was having some sort of seizure and freaked out. End of beautiful romance....

The worst one I had was a guy I was friends with for ages, he seemed so normal and nice, anyway we were in his flat chatting and he asked if he could do my make-up for me (this wasn't to weird he was a make-up artist) anyway he started getting silly and we started play fighting then ended up in a steamy embrace.
Just as things were about to really 'begin' he asked me if I would just lay down still as he had a thing for corpses.
I freaked out and ran all of the way home and when I got there I realised when he was messing about with the make up he had put blue eye shadow around my mouth and made me really pale to look well like a corpse.

I am dying. Dying.

I left one boyfriend as he wouldn't get engaged to me .
I left one because he called me by a shortened version of my name .
I left 2 because they hit me.
I had one boyfriend I never actually finished with and he didn't me, he just stopped calling but I knew it was over really. He knew I was in love with my ex still.

He said it was "egotistical to perpetuate your own genes" i.e. Have kids.

I dumped him.

He now has a kid with the most pretentious name I ever heard of.

Will never eat a cocktail sausage again

I dumped someone because when we were getting down to things in the bedroom, he pushed my hand down to his penis before I was ready to go there.

Instant no.

The man who told me that he couldn't be bothered to have sex if he had to wear a condom. Charming!

One who phoned up to ask me out but said let's meet after dinner as it is so expensive eating out!! So stingy.

My boss at a job I had ages ago who made a pass at me (knowing I was in a long term relationship) by walking past my desk and talking about "dinner and sex." At least he was offering to throw in the dinner first I suppose! No thanks!

An older married man who, after a work dinner, lunged at me in a taxi without any encouragement from me at all - I could not get away fast enough. Soooo embarrassing.

My ex-bf was late meeting me and I had been standing waiting for him for 30 minutes. When he arrived he told me that he was late because he'd been having a wank, and it was so good he fitted another two in before coming to meet me!