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Original poster

Fussy eating as an adult - is this a common thing?

161 replies

Strawberrycocktail · 14/10/2023 12:51

My DH seems to me to be quite a fussy eater. He seems to have a long (and growing) list of foods/dishes he has specified he doesn’t like. So much so it becomes hard to shop for meals for a family. I try to raise my children as unfussy eaters and encourage them to try different foods. I have accepted fussiness at a young age but encourage more adventurousness as they get older. My eldest (16) is now reasonably adventurous in food choices and will at least try and eat most food put in front of him even if he has some things he eats more enthusiastically than others. However, DH stands out as the consistently and resolutely picky ester in our house. I can’t think of a time when I have refused to eat any choice if food he has bought even if it wouldn’t have bern something I would have chosen myself. I wondered if I am unusually unfussy or us my DH unusually fussy? What happens in other people’s houses? Are you all trying to navigate your partner’s food dislikes or are you the one who has a long list of food dislikes or do you both muddle along eating most food without complaint?

OP posts:
Nanny0gg · 15/10/2023 17:18

PaminaMozart · 14/10/2023 22:40

Im curious about ‘fussy’ eaters as it’s a very alien concept to me. I’d find it difficult to have to constantly navigate my dietary choices.

Have you ever consciously tried to desensitize yourself, for instance by consciously taking small bites and trying to explore and get to grips with the taste and texture?

also wondering whether techniques such as CBT might help? Just thinking aloud…

My mother tried the equivalent.

Small pieces 'hidden' in my food (cauliflower in amongst the potatoes, that kind of thing)

Didn't work and ruined many a meal. I just work round it. I'm too old to eat food I really don't like, And I AM better than I used to be

But if I don't like it I don't like it

Nanny0gg · 15/10/2023 17:19

OldSchoolCasualty · 15/10/2023 16:32

my OH is a fussy eater, as as I do the weekly menu and shopping it drives me insane the list of things he wont eat! there's about 30 meals now that are all variations on chicken that he will eat. No pork, no beef unless its a burger, no lamb, fish but only if it's breaded or the finger variety, nothing green! It's like feeding a 4 year old.

If it causes a problem then he cooks for himself

Bumface56 · 15/10/2023 17:55

As a child I couldn't eat certain foods because of the texture. Beans on toast was a nightmare if the beans touched the toast and cereal with milk was out of the question. It was the sogginess.
As an adult the main thing I avoid is shellfish, again I have tried but does make me gag.
My DH hates cheese and tomatoes but loves anything cheese flavoured. He also eats cooked tomatoes in anything, chilli, curry, Bolognese.
If you don't like certain foods then you shouldn't be pressured into it.
It's controlling and doesn't make it enjoyable for anyone.

WtP · 15/10/2023 18:47

I guess I am probably the least fussy eater in the world?
I've tried and enjoyed pretty much all foods from around the world so find it a real struggle to understand people that don't even try stuff.
I am quite happy if you have tried it but it wasn't to your taste. But to just point blank refuse whole swathes of ingredients just because you think you won't like it is a bit odd.
I get that some people with sensory issues would struggle with textures but many I have known just won't try anything else other than stuff from their childhood.

octodrive · 15/10/2023 18:51

I've tried and enjoyed pretty much all foods from around the world so find it a real struggle to understand people that don't even try stuff.

It's ok, you don't need to understand them. You just need a simple bit of respect for their choice.

Ladyj84 · 15/10/2023 18:54

No fussy eaters in our house hubby will eat anything and kids brought up same way

WtP · 15/10/2023 19:08

octodrive · 15/10/2023 18:51

I've tried and enjoyed pretty much all foods from around the world so find it a real struggle to understand people that don't even try stuff.

It's ok, you don't need to understand them. You just need a simple bit of respect for their choice.

I'm probably not the right person for this thread, I respect people who have at least tried something or can easily give me a reason why they won't but the "Oh I would never try that" brigade sort of wind me up?

Mother87 · 15/10/2023 19:11

Nightell · 14/10/2023 12:55

My DH will eat anything and everything, but I am very fussy. Always have been and probably always will be.

This. Me too

bellac11 · 15/10/2023 19:17

WtP · 15/10/2023 19:08

I'm probably not the right person for this thread, I respect people who have at least tried something or can easily give me a reason why they won't but the "Oh I would never try that" brigade sort of wind me up?

Show quote history

Its not a moral issue is it?

You're not better than someone because you want to try something and they dont.

No one owes you a reason about what they want to put in their mouth.

AngryGreasedSantaCatcus · 15/10/2023 19:36

OldSchoolCasualty · 15/10/2023 16:32

my OH is a fussy eater, as as I do the weekly menu and shopping it drives me insane the list of things he wont eat! there's about 30 meals now that are all variations on chicken that he will eat. No pork, no beef unless its a burger, no lamb, fish but only if it's breaded or the finger variety, nothing green! It's like feeding a 4 year old.

If he's that fussy, he should take responsibility for feeding himself.

GCSister · 15/10/2023 19:51

I'm probably not the right person for this thread, I respect people who have at least tried something or can easily give me a reason why they won't but the "Oh I would never try that" brigade sort of wind me up?

So you'd prefer to see me gag or actually be sick? What an ignorant attitude

octodrive · 15/10/2023 19:57

@WtP

I'm probably not the right person for this thread, I respect people who have at least tried something or can easily give me a reason why they won't but the "Oh I would never try that" brigade sort of wind me up?

Self appointed diet police?

WTF?

You think people need to give you a reason as to why they don't want to try something?

Away you go you absolute balloon

WtP · 15/10/2023 20:25

I'm quite happy on my balloon 😊

Fussy eating as an adult - is this a common thing?
Namechangedforspooky · 15/10/2023 20:28

I’m quite fussy but DH does most of the cooking

i just pick and choose what I eat. We deliberately make extra to take to school the next day anyway as my daughter doesn’t like sandwiches so it doesn’t go to waste

GCSister · 15/10/2023 20:33

WtP · 15/10/2023 20:25

I'm quite happy on my balloon 😊

I guess some people are happy living in ignorance 🤷🏼‍♀️

WtP · 15/10/2023 20:35

GCSister · 15/10/2023 20:33

I guess some people are happy living in ignorance 🤷🏼‍♀️

Show quote history

No I'm quite happy for people to explain what they don't like.

PaintedEgg · 15/10/2023 20:43

WtP · 15/10/2023 19:08

I'm probably not the right person for this thread, I respect people who have at least tried something or can easily give me a reason why they won't but the "Oh I would never try that" brigade sort of wind me up?

Show quote history

do you really want people to spell it out to you why they find certain foods revolting?

do you need graphic details as to why someone finds certain food not appetising?

bellac11 · 15/10/2023 20:43

Blimey and you mustnt be made unhappy eh?

FrangipaniBlue · 15/10/2023 20:44

@Goldencup life's to short to eat food you don't like.

Forcing yourself to eat food you don't like is not sociable or polite, it's just plain daft.

I'd be horrified if I thought my friends were forcing themselves to eat food they don't like just to be "sociable" and eat at the places I like.

GCSister · 15/10/2023 20:46

No I'm quite happy for people to explain what they don't like.

There are certain things I physically cannot bring myself to try. These are relatively common food items but just the thought of them makes me gag.

According to your previous post you'd judge me for not trying these things. Who made you the food police?

2023shady · 15/10/2023 20:47

I've been called fussy but I don't think I am.. it's just the stuff I don't eat seems to be what other people love!
I don't like steak, lamb, offal, game, fish with bones or pistachios
Aside from that I eat anything

NancyJoan · 15/10/2023 20:50

I’m like you, OP, and will eat anything at all. When I met DH his palate was very limited. He’s better now, and will eat tomatoes, fish and eggs, which he didn’t before. Still won’t eat a mushroom, courgettes, aubergine. I do still cook with them, and he and DS eat round them. DD is like me, and will give anything a go.

Millybob · 15/10/2023 20:56

I have a friend like this. Most of what she claims she can't eat, she has never even tasted.

GCSister · 15/10/2023 20:58

Millybob · 15/10/2023 20:56

I have a friend like this. Most of what she claims she can't eat, she has never even tasted.

And?
Why is that a problem?

mondaytosunday · 15/10/2023 21:00

My sister is extremely difficult with food. She was anorexic as a teen and has never really conquered a very tricky relationship with food. She can be awful to eat out with, thinking we are over ordering, ordering the wrong things, looking at how much everyone eats. She has been staying with me for a few days and I let her buy and eat her own food and just cook for me and me daughter. She's fine with that. She did make a comment about how big our dinner was after going out for lunch, but I just ignored it. I am overweight, but if she should ever broach it I'd shut her down pronto.

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