It's over, isn't it?

[Timeout22]

I am having a very difficult time getting over an ex that I loved very much. He was the one to chase me in the start (love bombed I now realise) but things dwindled over time. He was really cut up when I ended it due to me not feeling like I got enough from him and since then I have wondered if I made the correct decision.

At the weekend I wanted to put my feelings of missing him out there and sent this:
'I know i've nothing to lose but I'm really missing out and having a difficult time getting over us. I'm not saying this to mess with your head but I thought it was best I put it out there'
He simply replied: 'it's very hard to know what to say, obviously it's the same for me. It's been a very difficult time for both of us'
I said: 'you don't need to know what to say'

Since then zero reply from him. I know this is a big sign it's over but I felt I needed to share it as I am checking my phone far too much for some magical message from him.....

Given that you've put it out there why don't you say more clearly what you want, and if you get back together, resolve to take things slooowwly. If he's a love bomber that does send up red flags , as you obviously found out before.

You send that first message about missing him to test the waters, but that second message to him should have been more straightforward. "I agree. Why don't we meet up for a coffee?"
The message you did send instead didn't really invite any further response from him. I wouldn't know what to respond to that. You messed up the convo with that one. Just be more direct in your next text to him.

the message reads more like a venting frustration over your feelings than extending an olive branch to patch things up and try again

the lat bit is really weird and manipulative too

Nobody is going to be thinking of repairing the relationship after reading a message like that

Also, adults should be able to communicate clearly and openly. You said you didn't want to get hurt so you played some weird game of manipulation and...got your feelings hurt. Probably his too.

How long have you been together and how long has the split been ?

Op, you clearly ended things to enforce some boundaries and you have buckled first and contacted him.

He knows you want him back, but he's not running to you, if he manages to get you to beg for him, he may return but on his terms.

You can't win here.

Did you end things so he can beg to come back? Promise he will change? Send texts / gifts / phone you saying how he needs you? But it backfired?

Then you are not behaving as an adult, and you don't love him.

Step back and have a read about how healthy adult relationships work. It's nothing like what you're doing. It's not about coded messages, testing the water, being cagey about your feelings, mind reading, push/pull.

If you can't tell him what you want no how you feel, you can't have a relationship with him.