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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I think she's being scammed..

129 replies

tigereyes10 · 25/09/2023 15:49

Hi, I'm not sure if this is the right place to post so feel free to report/have it moved. I'm really worried about a colleague..a couple of months ago she told me she'd been talking to a man online and was very excited by it, then another day she confided in me that he was famous but couldn't say who...then another day she told me it was Jeremy Kyle & they'd met via Facebook. This woman is in her 50s, never had a relationship, is fairly socially awkward & I know she's lonely, I don't want to call her vulnerable but she probably is - the perfect recipe for a scammer! I told her at the time to be careful, it probably wasn't him, never send money etc but she wouldn't have it and said it was definitely him. Then she told a couple of other people and it ended up getting spread around work..some people finding it funny, some finding it worrying. But it died down & she told me he'd gone to prison and they weren't talking anymore. Fast forward to last week, she told me they were still talking..he's promising to come to her house when he gets out of prison, wants to send her handbags etc etc...I'm trying not to be mean to her but I keep reminding her that there's a very high chance (100%!!) That it's not him, it would be in the media if JK was locked up. But she's really adamant it's him, she's totally brainwashed by the idea and nothing I say is changing her mind. I've tried to stay out of it because if it makes her happy talking to someone online then who am I to get involved. However, today she's told me that she's going to take out a £30,000 loan to bail him out of prison, and she's going to be repaying £75 a month for years...but in her eyes she's doing the right thing and she's helping him. She won't listen when I tell her not to send money or get into debt for a man she's never met regardless of the fact it's definitely a scammer. How can I help her? I'm honestly tempted to call 101 and ask for their advice because I can't let her send him that money! X

OP posts:
Littlegreene82 · 11/10/2023 18:51

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This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Pinkbonbon · 11/10/2023 19:01

If its not been said, there's a site called social catfish ,(I think) where she can test the profile out for scams. Eg: reverse image search the pictures to see if there's lots of other fake profiles with them. Amd check the things they've said for common scam paragraphs ect...

I'd also watch some social catfish YouTube and send her links to any that seem similar. Eg: there was a girl on one episode thar thought she was dating an actor from Stranger Things.

QueenofTheSlipstreamVM · 11/10/2023 19:02

Go on Instagram and send this to Jeremy Kyle.. he will definitely help .. it's happened to others and he's put status before about people pretending to be him and scamming women when it's not him.
Or send it Via Talk TV of which he is now a host and they will help

SamW98 · 11/10/2023 19:27

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m000b1px

Point her towards this show on BBC where there’s many examples of vulnerable people being scammed out of £1000’s by romance fraud.

It’s a real eye opener

BBC One - For Love or Money

Consumer series focusing on online dating scams.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m000b1px

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