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Original poster

To not go on another date because of his car..

283 replies

bluebellmountain · 01/09/2023 20:46

Met a guy OLD, we have been on 4 dates, twice we've met in public, once I picked him up to go out to eat and once I have been to his house. He seemed a great guy, we hit it off pretty quickly, I feel comfortable around him, he seems genuine and kind. Own house, good job etc.

I was out after work this evening to say goodbye to a colleague moving on, so id got a lift to work and was planning on getting a taxi home. This guy text to ask how I was etc and turns out he was nearby and heading to the gym so offered to drop me home, I was excited to see him so agreed.

He arrives to pick me up and my heart sank, his car was fine, a mondeo, pretty standard car but it had been modified to make that stupid noise when you accelerate, you know the kind of boy racer unnecessarily loud car. I got in and said wow that's rather noisy and he gave me some explanation as to what had been done to the car, how much it cost etc.. and it's really really put me off him.

I'm 35, he's 38, surly we're far too old to be driving round in a car like that. I was actually embarrassed to be in the car with everyone looking at every bang it made.

Am I an awful person, should I look past this? He was being nice and doing me a favour and all I could think of was getting out of there! Would this put you off someone who, granted I don't know well, but seems to be pretty good in every other area.

OP posts:
porridgeisbae · 03/09/2023 11:45

There's usually something about anyone that is somewhat cringe, even a really attractive guy.

You could see how it goes and if you can overlook it.

Men can be into stuff like that at any age.

porridgeisbae · 03/09/2023 11:49

Why does a standard car need to have its performance enhanced?!

It's just for fun. I mean, it doesn't necessarily improve performance, sometimes it's just to make a more racery noise.

I agree that it's a bit mid life crisis territory.

Sounds like you find him annoying /offensive in general, so, onto the next.

beatrix1234 · 03/09/2023 11:54

@bluebellmountain He said he doesn't like going out and hearing children screaming but he has to accept it.

There’s a difference between “acting different and not caring what others think of you” and “terrorising old people and children and not caring what they think of you”. He doesn’t sound like the most Kind and empathic man in town really, and the lack of those Qualities gets applied into other aspects of life. You have a special needs child and I don’t see this man as being the right partner. Kindness is vital in a man, sorry but he’s showing you his true colours on that first date and they’re not pretty.

porridgeisbae · 03/09/2023 12:05

IDK how many older people or children are 'terrorized' by it. My friend can tell when people've done it because he's into these things. I wouldn'tve noticed before, or, it would just sound like a car that's gone a bit wrong.

TroysMammy · 03/09/2023 12:10

If I see or hear any souped up vehicle I always mutter "twat".

CaptainMyCaptain · 03/09/2023 12:37

TroysMammy · 03/09/2023 12:10

If I see or hear any souped up vehicle I always mutter "twat".

So do I. I'd also like to point put to the bloke defending these noisy cars that the people staring at you as you pass aren't gazing in admiration they are all thinking 'twat'.

Anniegetyourgun · 03/09/2023 14:27

There's one that used to drive round and round our town making such a huge racket that you wouldn't have to be some kind of expert to work out whether it had been modified - bang, pop, roar, and given the shape of the town they couldn't have got up to more than 15mph at any stretch. I'm not known for my delicate nerves but it made me jump. I thought of asking them if they ever stopped at a traffic light near me whether they couldn't afford to get it fixed. But no doubt that would be terribly funny because I didn't understand they'd made it like that on purpose, silly me 🙄

Haven't seen them for a while, actually. Hope either they got served an injunction or the shit-heap fell apart. It sounded as though it was about to.

PinkB87 · 03/09/2023 15:01

MarshyMcMarshFace · 02/09/2023 10:37

@PinkB87 I don’t want to be subjected to your additional exhaust noise.

it is incredibly inconsiderate , selfish and probably dangerous. Making people jump with unnecessary loud ‘pops’ while driving is not a good idea.

Sit in your own home and play engine noises to yourself through headphones. Don’t subject the rest of us to it.

My exhaust isn't loud and doesn't pop but I see your point

User13865890 · 03/09/2023 15:06

I just generally think the exhaust has blown and they need a new one.

Lucyccfc68 · 03/09/2023 18:42

Sticking a plastic spoiler, lowering the suspension and adding a noisy exhaust onto a 20 year old Corsa does nothing to enhance its performance. Just makes the driver look like a dick.

Its what young lads do in certain parts of the UK, as they think it makes them look cool.

MsRosley · 03/09/2023 19:36

bluebellmountain · 03/09/2023 10:25

Update on the date.

It was our last date, it just isn't for me. We discussed the car, it isn't a performance model, it's a standard mondeo, it was a childhood dream and something his ex wife was dead against so when they separated and being old enough to afford it he decided he wanted to do it. I asked why he likes it and he just said he likes the noise and isn't bothered what people think of him. I said my son gets really upset when cars like that pass us, I said are you ok with scaring children and old people. He said that's life. He said he doesn't like going out and hearing children screaming but he has to accept it. Well, with an autistic child, public meltdowns are very much part of my life. So we just aren't compatible.

What an utter bell-end. You're well rid, OP.

Katmai · 03/09/2023 20:39

Yettisrus29 · 02/09/2023 08:28

I know nothing like a bit of sexism. I love cars, I think of a Mondeo as a salesman car though. I do like a Ford Mustang, McLaren and the Jaguar F-type. A friend has a Lamborghini so it's not even about thinking they're flashy or showing off.

A Mondeo is a fairly boring car.

Show quote history

Boring? What, one that sounds like someone's fired a shotgun into a box of firecrackers?

Katmai · 03/09/2023 21:01

RealisticGuy · 02/09/2023 19:18

I’ll say this one last time. There are performance versions of Mondeo’s. If he has put a remap and exhaust on it, it will significantly improve that performance. You can disagree with this as much as you like, but it is fact. You are being told this from experience not just a random idea.

He maybe wanted to further improve that, as it’s his hobby.

You might not understand the logic of that in any way, however it is a completely legitimate hobby that is a huge industry across the world. Just because you don’t enderstand something, doesn’t take the merit away from it

Edited
Show quote history

This is nothing to do with understanding the logic of something. It has everything to do with an unwanted assault on the eardrums.

Oh and by the way, everyone I know mutters 'dickhead' under their breath whenever they hear one go by. As do I.

Beaverbridge · 03/09/2023 21:03

He sounds a right knob, good riddance.

dodobookends · 03/09/2023 22:00

porridgeisbae · 03/09/2023 12:05

IDK how many older people or children are 'terrorized' by it. My friend can tell when people've done it because he's into these things. I wouldn'tve noticed before, or, it would just sound like a car that's gone a bit wrong.

Horses would have an adverse and dramatic reaction to it. Lorry air brakes are bad enough.

porridgeisbae · 03/09/2023 23:20

@dodobookends I can imagine. Not many horses near where most of these cars are, though. People with those kinds of car adaptations would maybe tend to be less keen on the countryside than the average person.

ImNotWorthy · 03/09/2023 23:29

@bluebellmountain, you posted: He said he doesn't like going out and hearing children screaming but he has to accept it. (emphasis added!)

Well bully for him, eh? The children, their mothers, and your neighbours have to accept it as well, do they? Confused

Good for you getting rid.

CaptainMyCaptain · 04/09/2023 07:23

porridgeisbae · 03/09/2023 23:20

@dodobookends I can imagine. Not many horses near where most of these cars are, though. People with those kinds of car adaptations would maybe tend to be less keen on the countryside than the average person.

I don't know about that. There are boy racers and horses where I live. There are huge areas that are neither city nor countryside. I can see farmers' fields from my house but I don't live in the countryside.

Ianar · 04/09/2023 09:25

I also wouldn't want to regularly travel in such a vehicle as I'm susceptible to cringe.

But I'm far more irked by people who drive unnecessarily large 4x4's, or large open backed trucks (unless for work purposes) with large engine capacities. Hogging road space and releasing great emlssions - often with a sole occupant driving them. Completely overkill and unnecessary yet have become the norm.

QueenBitch666 · 04/09/2023 10:27

It's a bit sad at any age tbh. Definitely a pass from me

idrinkandiknowthings · 04/09/2023 12:51

Setting aside the age.........who on earth pimps a Mondeo??? 😂😂

dodobookends · 04/09/2023 13:48

porridgeisbae · 03/09/2023 23:20

@dodobookends I can imagine. Not many horses near where most of these cars are, though. People with those kinds of car adaptations would maybe tend to be less keen on the countryside than the average person.

😂True.

Although there may be people suffering from PTSD who don't much appreciate what sounds like a volley of gunshots either.

User13865890 · 04/09/2023 14:50

I don't think I would go out with someone with a Mondeo anyway

DatingDinosaur · 04/09/2023 16:45

Just followed a low slung, sporty, soft-top Porche home. Now that had a lovely throaty purr of a fine tuned, high powered engine being driven sensibly for the road conditions.

Much more impressive than the racket one of these souped up roller skates makes when the driver works the accelerator like an on/off switch.

Castleview6 · 10/09/2023 09:09

It’s obviously a hobby/ interest to him and that’s fine. If you’re embarrassed by it and this is more important than all the things you liked about him then you won’t want to be with him.