So you meet someone, fall in love and plan a wedding.
Years down the line (9, to be precise), you are stuck with someone that you just don’t really fancy anymore and you have to live with the decision you made. Is that it?
My own situation: DH is 14 years older than me, we have 3DC. I have spent many years taking extended maternity and then part time jobs whilst he has had full access to his career. He does not share his money fairly and I pay for most bills etc. He has never had to take a day off work to take after a sick child, nor had to shorten his work day for pick up.
I feel resentment towards him for two main reasons: 1. He does not feel attached and therefore burdened by the children in anything like the same way I do. His work and life has carried on exactly the same way as pre-children. One of my DC was born on a Friday and I remember feeling pleased because at least he could make cups of tea for me over the weekend before returning to work on Monday (for the others he was back in work the very next day). 2. He’s incredibly tight with money. For instance, if I buy the children new school shoes and ask him to pay half, he won’t and will say I should have bought them secondhand. He won’t pay for music lessons (even though he can easily afford them) as he says it’s my choice that my DC want to do them.
I’d probably be better off on my own. But is this just normal among most marriages and for most men?