Hi everyone,
A bit of background. I’m 24, he’s 36. We met on a dating app. We’ve been dating for over two months now - and have been having sex since the fourth date. A week ago, I asked him where he thought the relationship was going (given that we’d not spoken about exclusivity yet). He said he was looking for a long term relationship and was enjoying getting to know me, but that he didn’t want to rush into a relationship yet, because it didn’t end well when he rushed into a relationship with his last girlfriend. He said he wasn’t speaking/seeing anyone else. I told him that I wasn’t happy with that and that I’d prefer to call it a day. I also raised other concerns, namely that we don’t have a lot of time to see each other because of his work commitments (and child).
Anyway, he’s since made all the right noises, saying he’d like me to be his girlfriend but he wants to ask at the right time, and that he’s going to drop some of his work commitments to see me, blah blah blah. Anyway, he’s not yet asked, and we’re still drifting along. We’re also both still on dating apps even though he’s said he’s logged out.
My last boyfriend was crazy about me, and asked me to be his girlfriend after a matter of weeks and it was a brilliant relationship (even though it ended). He told me he was falling in love shortly after. I can’t help feeling that that is what love and passion is supposed to be like rather than all these wishy-washy uncertainties.
On the one hand, he’s nice, handsome, thoughtful, introverted like me, and he was very determined to say all the right things when I said we should go our own separate ways. On the other, he takes 8 hours to respond to texts, doesn’t make me laugh, very rarely asks me questions about myself, and is wishywashy about exclusivity.
Do I just call it a day or persevere? Maybe he does just genuinely want it to “develop naturally”?
Sorry for the long ramble!