Boyfriend crying because of me,am I really horrible?

[redsblacksoranges]

So today

The more you post, the worse he sounds. I wouldn't be having a kid with him.

Everything is on his terms. Happy to go away for what he wants to do, but if you want to go away, he can't be arsed. I couldn't be with someone that selfish or tight.

Give yourself the best birthday present. ever, the best bit of self love ever, and dump this gaslighting, controlling DARVO loser. Please, for the love of all things good, do not get in any deeper with this man. If you think it's bad now, wait until you are tied forever to him through children and debt, and can never make a decision because he is controlling you, whether in marriage or as an ex.

Don’t marry or have children.
I lived with a sucker, who then also started refusing to go places.
it’s a miserable life.
I then married a partial sulker with issues of his own it hasn’t been the best life.

So he could have just said no then, suggested she go with someone else. But he didn't. He deliberately played for time so that he could sabotage her plans. Then cried and cancelled the hotel that he had wanted.

There’s 2 points to this.

Firstly, it’s your birthday. From your suggestions, it’s very obvious that you want to get away for a few days. He’s blatantly ignoring that.

and secondly, he’s reminding me of my ex. It’s okay to go away to go see his friends but it’s your birthday and it’s all too much trouble and too expensive?

I’d say make him cry one last time by dumping him OP. You could do better.

Because he doesn't care whats fun for you.
If you have kids it wont change anything for him. You'll deal with everything while he carries on doing whats fun for him

The tears and hissy fit are to get his own way. Obviously it has worked for him in the past so he adopts the same strategy.

Some people never get past the toddler stage emotionally.

For God's sake don't have kids with this one. He cries when he doesn't get his own way, and calls you sly? I would have dumped him on the spot for using that word at me. Can you imagine what your life would be like if you had his kids? He'd be endlessly manipulating and causing scenes to get attention. Find yourself someone who behaves like an adult.

I think you've proved my point though, "most people" are not you though and only you get to define yourself not other people
In your example yes you said something bad but that doesn't make you a bad person from one snippet of your life. I've done so bad things in my life (and good too) and none of those things define me as a person.
Who knows why you would say something like that but I'm sure it would make the other person stay far away!

OP, if you want a miserable life then stay with him. Otherwise, accept you have been given the gift of knowledge about this man. He is manipulative and selfish. Start building yourself an independent life away from him. He isn’t someone who will allow you to be happy.

Just ditch this manipulative big baby, otherwise you’ll be drying his crocodile tears until the end of time. It’s all about what he wants, isn’t it?

And now he's ruined your birthday and made it about him.

If you were still dealing with this three years from now, would that be ok?

He's showing you who he is, believe him. End it.

Happy birthday OP

If you can’t read the op properly why comment?

she told him what she wanted and he nipped in there first to book something shit so he wouldn’t have to go to the gig - which is what she actually wants to do. On her birthday.

you can do so much better than this OP. Please don’t settle

You won't like each other any more than you do now if you bring children into the mix, and you'll probably like each other a hell of a lot less.

Do not do it.

... and babies don't "come along". They're actively brought into the situation, don't bring any into this one.

He booked a hotel in the city where she lives! FFS how crap is that?

Goodness he sounds like a baby. You’ve spoilt the special surprise that he quickly booked to stop you from arranging something you actually wanted to do? Bullshit.

Go away with a friend and leave him at home. And don’t have kids with this pathetic, selfish, tight-fisted little man child.

redsblacksoranges · Today 11:11
@MrsSkylerWhite Blackpool was because I used to go with my mam when I was young and she passed away when I was 13
My happy memories before she got ill was going to Blackpool so for me it's a nice place to go -I know some people hate Blackpool tho ha ha”

Fair enough. Very sorry for your loss.

OP do as I just did and read your posts only, it is very clear that you two aren't a couple as such in the ususal sense. The bitching, sulking, whinging, crying and that's just from him.
Wake up to the fact that this so called man comes across like a hormonal teenage argunig with his mother.
Triple your contraception fgs or leave him. You can do so much better.

Book the tickets - go with a friend - it’ll be more fun than this fun sucker anyway.

Found the boyfriend

He’s controlling and manipulative OP, I hope you realise you deserve much much better before having DC with him.

He seems determined to piss on your chips op. It's actually really nasty behaviour. He will make everything utterly joyless for you if you stay with him. Especially if you have kids with him , he'll have you exactly where he wants you then.

Don't go to the foo fighters gig next year with him , as he's not willing to compromise for you.

This isn't just about your birthday op.