Card sent to husband by admirer

[Naz110]

Hey guys, so it was my husbands birthday and he got a birthday card in the post. In the card this person has stated they love him and he is their life, sunshine and he means the world to them. Me and husband got into a massive fight as the card has no name... he is saying he doesnt know who it is.. and his conscious is clear. He believes someone is stirring our relationship. Any advice would be great! I think he is being honest but why would someone send a birthday to a married man!

Did he send it to himself?

Normal functional people don't send those.

It must be someone he knows for them to send it on his birthday.

Are any of his friends the type to do a joke thing like that?

Has anything else happened to make you think it could be another woman?

Is he well known or a minor celebrity?

Alarm bells would be going off for me. Is there anyone that you could think of that is jealous or has an issue with you? If there are no obvious culprits for a spiteful gesture like this then I would be extremely suspicious. What is your gut saying? Do you have a strong relationship?

What is his job? Could he have a teenage girl or a vulnerable adult in love with him?

I’d automatically assume it was my sibling who sent it as a ‘joke’.
It is probably somebody you both kniw - his mum or sister!

His Mum? Don’t be bloody ridiculous.

Id be worried he had a stalker. I wouldn’t be having a fight and accusing him of cheating.

“the typical female stalker as a single woman in her mid-30s, divorced or separated, with a psychiatric diagnosis that is most frequently a mood disorder. Meloy et al. note that this female stalker profile is more likely to pursue a stranger, celebrity, or male acquaintance, contrary to what might be the stereotype of pursuing a prior romantic partner.”

https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/why-bad-looks-good/202305/the-truth-about-female-stalkers

Er, no idea why the divorce link also attached. Wasn’t intentional.

I'm guessing it's linked to his job.
(I'm imagining a healthcare professional with good bedside manner who all the elderly ladies flock to).
The wording doesn't sound very 'affair' to me.

Yikes! Those suggesting it's a joke from siblings..really??? Do you think your circle of friends or family would play such a 'joke'.

This stuff could break families!

I'd prob be suspicious, keep your eyes wide open. I'm pretty sure you hubby knows who this is .. but could well be innocent on his behalf.

Hope you get this solved! What awful person would do this. 😑

If the card is handwritten, then there may be clues as to the age of the writer - which of course may not be the sender. Did the card arrive in the envelope designed for it, or was it disguised in any way?
As others have said, is there anything in your husband's line of work or favourite hobby that might lead to an infatuation?

If this was a reverse situation, everyone would be saying how dare he accuse you of cheating based on (probably) someone with a crush on you amf unstable sending you a card. Yes, ther is a small chance he can guess who it is, still not his fault - a genuine affair partner who wanted to 'tell the wife' wouldn't do it via a soppy card!

Yes I have a sibling who would do this!

How would an acquaintance know his birthday and home address?

Is he a teacher?

I’ve had two cards sent to me by a freaky customer in the shop I work in. Definitely no encouragement other than normal chitchat that I’m required to do in the name of customer service. Apparently I’m lovely and he’s written songs for me. Some people are just weird and have no idea when their unwanted crushes are not reciprocated. I wouldn’t assume any cheating on this evidence alone.

Hmmm.. similar sort of thing with a friend, she received a letter saying her DH was having an affair, and we all thought it was true because why would anyone go to the trouble, and it was hand delivered.
Convinced he was guilty.
Until the wives/partners of 3 other male senior members of staff at the same workplace received the same letter. A disgruntled former employee had got their addresses and posted all 4 of these fake letters as some form of revenge.

Any chance it could be something similar?

Seems odd

They're not online or what

Someone once sent my partner an anonymous gift once and it was hard not to think the worst, but it was from one of his friends thinking it was funny and who hadn’t thought that it could worry me! I’m sure it’s just a (loser) friend of his having banter.

It’s really easy to find that information online. I found the birthdays and home addresses of relatives I had lost contact with over twenty years ago….sent them Christmas cards and we are back in touch.

All the best op

If he was having an affair the OW wouldn’t want to risk the affair being discovered. My money is either on a friend playing an immature joke or someone he’s upset historically.

Certainly not!

@SauceForTheGoose certainly not!

@WatieKatie so DH has been out of a job for quite a while so we spend alot of time together, I dont think its an affair.. but its just upsetting to know someone wants to see us fight and create a barrier between us..